The stork is the bird that helps deliver babies. What bird helps prevent pregnancy?

The swallow.

What do you call an army of babies?


Whatโ€™s the difference between 20 dead babies and a Lamborghini?

I dont have a Lamborghini in my garage.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?

Depends on how hard you throw

This joke may contain offensive words. ๐Ÿค”

Three woman have a chat about the sex of their unborn babies.

The brunette says I'm sure I'm having a boy. My husband came in me while he was on top.

The redhead says I'm sure I'm having a girl. I was on top when my husband came in me.

The blonde starts crying.

What's wrong the other girls ask.

I don't want to have puppies!!

How warm are babies when they're just born?

Womb temperature

This joke may contain offensive words. ๐Ÿค”

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?

Definitely not 6 because my basement is still dark.

What's worse than finding 2 babies in a trash can?

Finding 1 baby in two trash cans.

The Jones didn't have any children and decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Jones kissed his wife and said, "I'm off, honey. The man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell with the hopes of making a sale.

"Good morning madam. You don't know me but I've come to....."

"Oh, there's no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Jones cut in.

"You have?" the photographer asked....

My son asked me "how babies are made?" I told him

Babys are delivered by a stork

Fat babies are delivered by a crane

And no Babys are delivered by a swallow

What do Endgame spoilers and anti vax babies have in common?

Both die in new.

This joke may contain offensive words. ๐Ÿค”

Dirty dead baby jokes?

My dad told me some pretty bad ones, so I guess let's collectively get them out there

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Cadillac?

A: I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?

A: I don'...

I was so ugly as a baby

That when my mother breastfed me, she used to close her eyes and think of other babies.

This joke may contain offensive words. ๐Ÿค”

A teenage girl come home from school and asks her mother a question

"Is it true what Rita just told me?" "What's that?" asks her mother. "That babies come out of the same place where boys put their penises?" said her daughter. "Yes it is dear!" replies her mother, pleased that the subject had finally come up and that she wouldn't have to explain it to her daughter. ...

What do babies wear when they go skateboarding?


Words are like Babies

Nobody cares until you start throwing them.

What do apples, bananas and babies have in common?

They all start going bad once exposed to air.

Why do babies miss their umbilical chords?

Because they grew attached to them.

Why do Chinese people have Chinese babies?

Because two Wongs don't make a white.

There's a new category of art where people paint babies who died in childbirth.

Still life.

This joke may contain offensive words. ๐Ÿค”

A woman and her 12-year-old son were riding in a taxi in Detroit.

It was raining and all the prostitutes were standing under awnings.
"Mom," said the boy, "what are all those women doing?"
"They're waiting for their husbands to get off work," she replied
The taxi driver turns around and says, "Geez lady, why don't you tell him the truth? They're hookers,...

What is the day when most Babies are born?

Well, I was always told it's Labor Day.