I shot an arrow into the air, where it went I had no care...

then it hit me.

Time flies like an arrow

but fruit flies like a banana

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Student 1: My name is Tom Archer because my ancestors were making bows and arrows.

Student 2: My name is Sam Baker because my forefathers were bakers.


Student 3: My name is John Dickinson, and I hate this game.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her 3rd grade class. The boy said, "Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she's in Grade 4".

The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal. The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.

Principal: What is 3+3?

Boy: 6.

Principal: 6+6.

Boy: 12.

The boy got all the questions right. The principal told the Madam to send ...

Did you hear the one about shooting an apple off your head with a bow and arrow?

Yeah, I don’t wanna Tell you.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Robin Hood was dying

Robin Hood was dying. He had lived a great many years, and now he was old, grey, and bedridden. He put out messages for all his friends to see him; and so at the appointed hour, Maid Marian, Little John, Friar Tuck, and the rest of the Merry Men gathered in his bedchamber.

"Maid Marian, my l...

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone

Robin Hood's last words

As Robin Hood lie dying, his loved ones and merry men, not so merry now, gathered round. With faltering, hesitant breathes, he calls for his bow and an arrow.

"This bow," he says, "has saved my life, kept me fed, brought peace to our land. I will fire it one last time and beg only that I be b...

How can you tell if an arrow is nervous?

See if it quivers.

What does an arrow do when it’s excited?

It quivers

How many flat-earthers does it take to draw an arrow?

None. They can't make a point.

I got my friend a new set of arrows, but he said they looked like they sucked

I told him not to knock it until he nocks it.

One of my friends is scared of seeing a bow and arrows.

He always quivers in fear around them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a prostitute with a bow and arrow?

Debarchery

A Racy Joke?

A group of 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to Churchill Downs to see and learn about thoroughbred horses. When it was time to take the children to the bathroom, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the...

There was this guy working at McDonald’s.

and it was his turn to cook the French fries. So he put the frozen fries in the metal basket and dipped it in the oil. You see this guy was a veteran chef and used to be able to sense when food was cooked by looking at it's color or by smelling it, he never needed a timer or a meat thermometer or an...

Two men were hunting deep in the woods one late afternoon

As the sun set over the horizon, the two hunters realized they were lost. Finding themselves outside of signal range and miles from civilization, they mulled over their options for rescue.

"Oh," one man perked up, "I remember reading that if you fire three shots in the air, it's a sign of dis...

I think one day I'll be able to shoot an arrow off my son's head

Time Will Tell

Why does the arrow on the computer screen use profanity a lot?

Because it was a cursor.

What is Green Arrow's superpower?

He can turn left whenever he wants.

The members of the newly-formed Justice League were introducing themselves to each other.

S: “I’m Superman; I can fly, move at super speed, and have super strength.”

B: “I’m Batman; I’m the world’s greatest detective, master of many martial arts, and have gadgets that can do almost anything.”

GL: “I’m Green Lantern; my emerald bling can create constructs of anything I can i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It's 1845 and a man travels to Montana with his wife and son to settle. (LONG)

It's 1845 and Jacob travels to Montana with his wife and son to settle. After hard work, he has a log cabin built and pulls a brass bell from a steamer trunk they brought with them.

His wife, Sara, is bemused, asking what the bell is for. As the man proceeds to hang it from the eaves just in...

(Multiple Punchlines) One Should Never Make Fun of Someone Else's Bow.

1. They might not think it's friendly ribbon.
2. You should have the presents of mind to be polite
3. If they have an arrow, they might shoot you with it.
4. They might get angry and resort to violins.
5. In that situation, it's best to be curt, see?
6. Just say the bow wowed you.
...

What’s the difference between you and a guy who dresses up in a toga & wings and shoots arrows at couples on Valentine’s Day

One’s a Cupid Stunt...

A physics professor retires and buys a lake house.

The first thing he does is build two long wooden platforms out over the lake. Every day he goes out with a bow and some arrows and stands on one of them while shooting arrows into the lake. One day a curious neighbor goes up to him and asks "what exactly are you doing?". The physicist replies "well ...

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese man imitating a phone ringing and answering the call.

"Wing, wing, arrow?"

I used to be Muslim, but then I took an arrow to the knee...

Now I Muslimp.

A fool wearing an eye patch enters an archery contest

The contestants are told to hit the target in the distance. The guy wearing the eye patch picks up his bow, pulls back an arrow, and releases it. The arrow completely misses the target, goes in a totally different direction, and buries itself in the hat of one of the judges. The judge jumps up, shoc...

I don’t like blunt arrow heads.

They are pointless.

Which is better, Arrow or Flash

Being an Apple Fan, i think it's the arrow. I don't support Flash.

A man goes into confession on his way home from the gold course

Forgive me Father I have sinned.

*Tell me what happened son*

Well, I used the Lords name in vain. I was out golfing this morning and hit the most beautiful drive of my life, straight as an arrow, it must've carried 300 yards, right down the middle of the fairway.

*So you got a l...

What haw two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone.

(I'm Chinese and I give this joke the Chinese stamp of approval)

An economist, a chaos theorist, and a statistician are trying to shoot a deer for dinner with a bow and arrow...

The economist assumes no wind, and misses five feet to the left. He hands over the bow to the chaos theorist, who overestimates the effect of the wind, and misses five feet to the right. The statistician pumps his fist in the air and exclaims: "We got him!".

One more Russian one

2 guys are lost in the middle of siberian forest. One of them says "shoot. Maybe someone will hear us". So the guy shoots once, twice, thrice but no one came to help. His friend said shoot more and the guy replied "I can't. I'm out of arrows"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The history of the middle finger

I never knew this before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Isn't history more fun when you know something about it?

Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415, the French, anticipating victory ov...

A couple of hunters go out into an unfamiliar woods.

They're stopped by the Game Warden who asks them, "I don't recognize you fellers from around here. Do you boys know your way around these here woods?"

"Well no, but we can find our way out after we get our deer."

"Okay, but if you do happen to get lost, just fire 3 shots in the air. Th...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dad wanted to teach his son how to shoot a bow and and arrow.

So they go out to the backyard and Dad shows the son how to do it.

The son takes the bow and fires off, and the arrow goes flying over the fence and into their neighbor's yard. The son goes to retrieve the arrow. When he comes back, arrow in hand, he says:

"Dad, I have bad news and ve...

Time flies like an arrow...

...but fruit flies like a banana.

Probably, a lot of you already know this one. But I posted it from a -- *ahem* -- 'philosophical' consideration (not a really good idea for a joke subreddit).

But I think about this joke from time to time. Not only is it a complex double pun -- flie...

An old joke.

Two hunters were lost in a forest.

One tells the other, “I heard that if you fire three times in the air, that can help people to find you.”

They try that once, then again an hour later but still no-one turned up.

The second hunter says “I am not sure we should try that again.”...

What did Achilles say when he got hit by an arrow?

Aww heel no!






Kill me right now.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teacher in 1st grade at school is angry with a student that always swears and pays no attention to the lesson

"what's your problem?" Teacher asks

"Miss, I think I shouldn't be in the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm far smarter than her. I should be at least in the 3rd grade" he replies.

She goes with him to the principal, with whom agree to do some knowledge tests.

-wha...

Once upon a time in a far away land...

There's a triangular lake, with three kingdoms on each side of the triangle.

The first kingdom is very rich, and the people are content. It has a very competent army, with a squire for every knight, and a total of twenty thousand knights. There is no hunger in the land.

The second kin...

The down arrow key on my laptop isn't functional. IT asked me if they should call the on-site repair guy to come in today...

I told them it wasn't pressing.

How do you improve your archery?

With better arrow dynamics.

3 Kids are arguing about who's dad is the fastest...

At lunch, the first boy says his dad is the faster because he is a brick layer & when he drops a brick from the 5th floor he can run to the ground level & be there before the brick hits...


Not bad says the 2nd boy, but my dad is faster.


He is a professional archer. ...

How does Ellen DeGeneres fire an arrow?

With her Les-bow.

Jerry was at a store meeting about some new covid procedures.

The manager said "Ok, listen up. Jerry, this means you. When you see a customer approach, stop 'em and ask about their health, temperature, and cough. Then..." he paused. "Jerry? You payin' attention?"

"Yeah, I hear you." said Jerry.

"Ok." he continued. "If they don't have a mask, just...

Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow in the sky

She missed

Old but gold, Captain Jack Arrow.

Jack Arrow was a captain of a pirate ship. He was always chased by danger. As one day, a crew member came up to captain jack and said " We got an enemy ship approaching us from behind, sir!!!" Captain Jack, with all confidence, replied "Bring me my red shirt!". As the enemy ship boarded Captain Jac...

I don't understand how DDR RAM works at all

How do they get their hooves to work the arrow keys?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An evil black knight and a holy white knight meet on the field of battle

The black knight calls out to his opponent, "behold the power of my sturdy lance and my steed! We will conquer this land and enslave its people on behalf of the dark wizard!"

The white knight responds, "nary have I enountered such a vile and wicked man! The people of this holy land shall rem...

Back in time

Stop me if you heard this joke:

Jimmy magically traveled back in time hundreds and hundreds of years.

He walked around the village feeling very superior to these uneducated and backward people. Saw them practicing with bows and arrows, riding horses, etc.

He walked up to the me...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.