I used to play the triangle in a reggae band.

But I got bored and quit because it was just one ting after another.

New study shows bodies found from the Bermuda Triangle all died from heat exhaustion...

...everyone knows its 180 degrees inside a triangle, I don't know why people even bother traveling through it.

A circle is circular, a triangle is triangular, a rectangle is rectangular, but a square is...

You. You're a square.

I once worked with a very musically talented Jamaican

I once worked with a very musically talented Jamaican who, after years of auditions for various instruments, got a gig in the local orchestra playing the triangle- not his first choice. One day he came in super stressed looking.

I said “What’s up...can't handle the pressure of performing on ...

The Bermuda triangle used to be known as the Bermuda rectangle...

...until one of the sides mysteriously vanished...

What's it called when a triangle has multiple partners?

Polygony.

Joined a new reggae band playing triangle

I just stand at the back and ting

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

How to play the “Devils Triangle” drinking game.

Devil’s Triangle is played a lot like quarters.

With two men and one woman,
Start with three glasses in a triangle.

Then the two men have sex with the woman at the same time.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Three kingdoms lay on a triangle lake

One kingdom lies on each side of the lake. For decades, the king's had argued over it's true owner, each claiming to be the first kingdom to settle there, and many tales of magical swords and godly favours to claim divine right. Eventually, this story telling and legal battling came to no conclusion...

What is the difference between Germany and the bermuda triangle?

The bermuda triangle has three points.

Why is the Toblerone chocolate shaped like a triangle?

So that it'll fit inside the box.

Where did the square go after killing the triangle?

To prism.

What do you call a triangle with attitude?

An isasceles triangle

The circle and the triangle

So a triangle and a circle meet each other and the triangle says: "you're pointless."

To which the circle replies: "that's how I roll!"

What do you call a triangle that gets into an accident?

A Wreckedangle

My friend and I were having a heated argument about the angle of a triangle

Things got messy and we went off tangent

Taking the side length that’s opposite of an angle in a right triangle is very much frowned upon.

It’s considered a sin.

What newspaper does a triangle read?

...the *hypotenews*

What do a blonde and the Bermuda Triangle have in common?

They both swallow seamen.

Why did the mathematician shout “triangle!” At a deaf person?

He was speaking sine language

Nobody in the world knows what those tiny sideways triangles on a keyboard mean.

Well, more or less.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why don’t triangles have an SSA Congruence Theorem?

‘Cause that would be ass-backwards.

Today, in math class, we had to label triangles.

I would tell you the answers, but they're all classified now.

What do you call a triangle with four sides and a serious drinking problem?

A wrecked angle.

Why was the triangle sent to hell?

Cos sin

Why isn’t Taylor Swift a pair of congruent triangles?

Because there’s no ASS

Which body part hurts most when you get hit by a right-angled triangle?

Your sinuses.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common?

Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common?
A: They’ve both swallowed a lot of semen.

A horse walks into a bar and says: 'On a right triangle with sides X, Y, and Z, if X and Z are perpendicular, which side is opposite the right angle?'

The bartender says Y, the long face.

I was in a love triangle with my girlfriend and a tool. I told her she had to choose. Me or him.

She chose the ladder.

What do you call a triangle that got OWNED?

A rectangle.

Q: Why did the 30-60-90 triangle marry the 45-45-90 triangle?

A: They were right for each other

What kind of church does a triangle attend?

Anglican.

Why is it called a right triangle?

Because there are no degrees left!

Two triangles are having difficulty buying an apartment.

It turns out they needed to cosine.

One day the triangle player of an orchestra gets very ill and goes to the hospital.

He spends the entire day practising despite his fever and all his constant sneezing and sniffling. The next day, he goes home to find his house surrounded by police cars.

He asks a police officer, "What happened?"

The officer replies, "Your conductor came by your house to talk to you ...

If you made a triangle with sticks...

would it be twigonometry?

Why do math textbooks only ever give you one angle in a triangle?

Just cos.

How do you climb a triangle?

By scalene it

My trigonometry teacher and I got into a fight because she thinks triangles are the simplest polygon.

However, I think we can let digons be digons.

Police officer to a driver: “OK, driver’s license, vehicle license, first aid kit and warning triangle.”

Driver: “Nah, I’ve already got all that. But how much for that funny Captain’s cap?"

How did the triangle know he had appendicitis?

He had an acute pain in his side!

How did the right triangle commit suicide?

With a Hypote-noose

Why didn't the triangle go outside to get a tan?

Cos the sine said so!

Why did the obtuse triangle go to the beach?

Because it was more than 90 degrees.

You know what they say about cows in the Bermuda Triangle...

They moo in mysterious waves

What do the Bermuda Triangle and a blonde have in common?

They both swallow a lot of seamen.


Ahh stupid jokes. They never get old.

My brain is like the Bermuda Triangle

Information goes in, but is often never found again

What did the triangle need to do before he could get a loan?

He needed somebody to cosine.

How do you prove triangles congruent with attitude?

Do it with SAS.

Why was the obtuse triangle upset?

Because he is never right.

What kind of triangle jokes can never be made right?

Ones with an obtuse angle.

What kind of animal lives in a triangle

Hippotenuse

What did one triangle say to the other triangle?

Hey, we should get together and square dance!

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Old man at work told me this one!

What's the difference between a vagina and a cunt?

"You know when you open that playboy centerfold and you see that little triangle shape between her legs?" "That's the vagina....everything else around it is a cunt."

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Dave wanted to send a letter to his girlfriend..

So he goes to the nearby market to buy an envelope. Just as he is about to enter the store, a man rushes out the market, furious,yelling and swearing. Dave didn't want to get in the mans way and just lets him pass. He enters the store and finds the cashier, a young lady, crying.

"Is everythi...

What did the triangle say to the preacher?

Forgive me father for I have sin().

Why was Yoda bad at geometry?

Because to him there are no triangles, only do-or-do-not-angles

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A man is tested by a psychologist for sexual obsession.

The psychologist draws a line and asks the man what it is. "This is a penis," answers the man.

Then the psychologist draws a circle and asks the man the same question. "This is a tit," replies the man.

Finally the psychologist draws a triangle, which the man identifies as a vagina...

Turns out that HR isn't happy that I invited some co-workers over to play a drinking game

I don't see what's so bad about playing a little devil's triangle to get to know people better

Hello, can I reserve a table for Pharaoh Hotepsekhemwy?

Could you spell by letters, please?


Yes, sure. A bird, two triangles, a wavy line, the sun, again a bird, a dog's head, a scarab

I went to see a concert performance by the Royal Bermuda Philharmonic orchestra...

Half way through the first symphony, the triangle player vanished...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Man: Doctor i think i have a problem, everywhere i look i see naked women

Doctor: interesting. Alright let's see. *doctor draws a circle on paper.* What do you see here?

Man: A naked woman

Doctor: Hmm. *draws a rectangle on paper.* And what do you see here?

Man: A naked woman again

Doctor: Alright. *draws a triangle on paper*. And here?

...

Three Squaws Were Each Preparing For The Birth Of Their First Child.

Three squaws were each preparing for the birth of their first child. The
first squaw placed a large bear hide by a river, the second squaw placed
an elk hide by a tree by a river, and the third squaw placed a
hippopotamus hide by a path, near the river and the tree so that the
three form...

An Indian and a Cowboy

meet in the dessert. The Indian points one finger at the cowboy. In Reaction to that the Cowboy points two fingers at the Indian. After that the Indian forms a triangle with his hand and then made a wave motion. To that the cowboy made a wavemotion and they parted ways.

The cowboy at home tel...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Four men and their dogs

Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are. The first man as an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist, the fourth was a Government Worker.

To show off, the Engineer called to his dog. "T-Square, do your stuff." T-square trotted over to a desk, took...

Breaking News: Al-Gebra Operative Arrested

A man was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport , New York, as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Jeff Sessions said he believes the man is a member o...

What did the Polygon say to the Circle when the Circle wanted to be more edgy?

Triangles.

A Pharoah makes a reservation at a ski resort...

Pharaoh: I'd like to make a reservation for two please.

Attendant: Absolutely. Can I get your name please.

Pharoah: "Neferneferuaten"

Attendant: ...can you spell that out for me?

Pharaoh: Bird, double triangle, wavy line, dog head, more bird, flames..."

A joke that makes no sense

Guy: I need to get back into shape

Guy’s friend: What kind of shape? A triangle?

What's the ugliest shape?

An eyesoresceles triangle.

A circle went to a party uninvited

"This party is only for shapes with edges. You cannot be here.", said the triangle.

The circle replied, sipping his drink, "I know. That's just how I roll."

Its interesting that different animals have different ways of showing what type of food they eat

Birds for example. They have triangle beaks if they eat plant, but hooked beaks if they eat meat

And those with flat teeth eat plants but ones with more canine sharp teeth eat meat.

Usually it would be hard to tell with humans, but they'll just tell you if they're vegan.

A circle accidentally shot a square...

his triangle buddy said, "Well, i guess he's poly-gone."

White Elephant

An old farmer is tending his crop one day when he spies a white elephant trampling the edge of his field. He knows that there are four different types of elephants in his area: red elephants, blue elephants, purple elephants, and white elephants.

To kill a blue elephant you use a blue elep...