Before the surgery, the anesthesiologist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle...

It was an ether/oar situation.

I'm an anesthesiologist.

I get to pass gas for a living.

An anesthesiologist asks his colleague, "Man I borrow some chloroform?"

"Knock yourself out."

What do you call a rabbit who is an anesthesiologist?

An Ether Bunny

I asked the anesthesiologist if I could administer my own anesthetic...

He said “go ahead, knock yourself out!”

I used to go out with an Anesthesiologist.

She was a local girl.

So, apparently Rand Paul was sucker punched...

So Rand Paul, who happens to be an ophthalmologist, apparently got into a fight with his neighbor, an anesthesiologist. Paul claims he was sucker punched, but neither man was badly hurt.

Does make you wonder, though - an ophthalmologist who didn't see it coming and an anesthesiologist who fai...

What fashionable shoes do ninjas wear to the anesthesiologist?

Numb Chucks.

One night, a man and a woman meet at a bar

. After a drink or two, they start talking and come to realize that they're both doctors attending an out-of-town medical conference.
After about an hour, the man says to the
woman, "Hey. How about if we sleep together tonight-no strings attached. It'll just be one night of fun."
Considerin...

Silly Russian joke

Flight attendant is making an announcement:
*-Is there an anesthesiologist on board?*
Some bloke says:
*-I am anesthesiologist!*
The flight attended tells him to come to seat 12A. He comes to the seat 12A and there is another bloke pouring vodka into plastic cups. He says:
*...

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Doctors were asked if we should reopen the country. Here's what the experts said:

Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

Obstetricians felt certain everyone was laboring under a misconcepti...

How many anesthesiologists

does it… take… to… … change… … a… … … … …

I once met an anesthesiologist for a brain surgeon.

They said the pay was great, but the work was mind numbing.

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At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other.

The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. As they sit down at the restaurant, she excuses herself to go and wash her hands.

After dinner, one thing leads to another and they end up in her hotel bedroom. Just as things get hot, the female doctor interrupts and says she has to go and ...

How I became famous at a hospital during a surgery.

So to give some background information. I was 12 years old at the time and at Emory Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia. The reason why was so I could get a tumor out of my eyeball, which was usually a sign of cancer in people in their 50s-60s, not when they are 12. So when I was in the waiting room for my...

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What's the difference between a urologist and an anesthesiologist?

An urologist plays with somebody else's penis during surgery.

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A man and a woman meet up for sex

The man, who had really enjoyed himself asks the woman afterwards, "Are you a nurse?" The woman replies "Yes I am. How did you know?" The man answers "because you took care of me so well." The woman then asks him "Are you an anesthesiologist?" He answers proudly, "Yes. How did you know?" The woman r...

In the world of flies, a young fly needed a heart transplant.

After being taken to surgery, the fly anesthesiologist put the young fly to sleep. The fly doctor's assistant cut open the young fly’s chest. He then announced to the fly heart doctor, "Your fly is open."

The heart doctor blushed.

My dad always said

" First rule of theater is always leave them wanting more"

Good actor, bad anesthesiologist.

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How'd You Know?

A young man and woman meet at a bar.

They start to talk and really hit it off, so they decide to go back to her place for the night.

They are just about to get it on when the woman gets up and starts to scrub up in the sink. She carefully washes from the ends of her fingers all the way...

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THE DOCTOR'S CONVENTION

There's a bunch of doctors gathered together at a doctor's convention one night. A male doctor notices a female doctor from across the room. The female doctor notices also and the next thing you know, they're sitting next to each other by the end of dinner.



After dinner, the male asks...

No Bedside Manner

I’d never had surgery, and I was nervous. “This is a very simple, noninvasive procedure,” the anesthesiologist reassured me. I felt better, until … “Heck,” he continued, “you have a better chance of dying from the anesthesia than the surgery itself.”

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After having sex

2 doctors are laying in bed after having sex. The guy says "You must be an OBGYN because you can work that pussy." The woman says "You must be an anesthesiologist because I didn't feel a thing."

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A doctor and a nurse hook up for a random "one-time" affair in one of the hospitals many rooms...

...As they are getting ready to "do the deed" the nurse proceeds to scrub-down from fingertips to elbows. The doctor says to her "Hey, you must be an O.R. Nurse right?" To which the nurse replies "well, yes I am, what gave me away?" The doctor says "well, it was easy, you just scrubbed down before ...

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A man is about to have surgery on his penis...

... As the surgeon walks in, he takes a look at the mans penis and yells out, "JESUS CHRIST, MAN!! What the hell happened to you?!?"

Guy on the table says to him, "it's a long story."

"Well we've got some time before the anesthesiologist arrives, so you can lay it on me if you want" ...

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Two doctors meet at a bar

She takes him back to her place. That morning he is drinking coffee and watching her wash her hands. He says" You must be a surgeon." She replies "What ever gave you that idea?" He said, "I've observed the way you wash your hands you have good eye-hand coordination. And the way you take the time to ...

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