Dermatologist Jokes

He made too many rash decisions

A pirate goes to the dermatologist to check the red bumps on his arm.

The dermatologist looks at them, and says "Don't worry, they're benign."

The pirate says, "Arrr! I counted them meself, and there be eleven of 'em!"

Now he has to start from scratch.

and says "Doctor, I have this terrible rash." She lifts up her sweater to reveal a large H-shaped rash.

The doctor replies, "Now, that is the strangest rash I've ever seen."

The woman explains, "Well, my boyfriend goes to Harvard and refuses to take off his letter sweater when we mak... read more

“I don’t want to breakout”

He kept making rash decisions.

Rumor has it he was last spotted on his way to a topical island.

and her boyfriend has terrible dandruff, so one day she asks the Dr. what she can do about it.He says, "Its simple, just give him head and shoulders." The next day she comes in and says to the Dr. " I've got one more question, how do you give someone shoulders?"

Being a health concious pirate, he books an appointment with his dermatologist to get them checked out. The dermatologist takes a look and says "Well, cap'n, i've done a thorough examination and i'm pretty sure they're benign"



Blackbeard replies "Arrrrrr, can ye check again? I'm sure ... read more

A dermatologist walks into a bar and orders a vodka tonic. He notices that the bartender has a patch of red scaly skin on his arm. "Say," the dermatologist comments, "you should really have that spot looked at." The bartender replies, "That seems like a rash statement."

"What's so funny?" asks the dermatologist.

"Sorry, it's a inside joke." replies the surgeon.

I can't make a rash decision.

Their care for you is only skin deep.

*Thank ButIamARobot for the idea!

I'm not too worried though alopecia it all together in the end.

Quit-itch

I wish I could see the dermatologist.

His dermatologist told him to apply the medication locally.

Doctor: I'm a dermatologist, not a veterinarian!

They are both engaged in a conversation when all of a sudden, one of the surgeons starts laughing hysterically. A dermatologist walks over to their table to join them. He asked the surgeons, "what's so funny?" One of the surgeons replies, " you wouldn't understand. It's an inside joke. "

A question on an internet forum:

Q: Please help, I have this great itching between my toes.

A: Well, that depends. If the itching is between all toes, consult a dermatologist. If the itching bothers you only between your two big toes, consult a gynecologist.

A cheerful young noble knocks on a witch's door and tells her that he's always wanted to become a bear, and that he will reward her handsomely if she transforms him. She accepts, and starts gathering components for her spell. The man follows her around the whole time, explaining how he had read abou... read more

I thought it was a strange thing for a dermatologist to say but hey good to know

A woman walks into the dermatologists office complaining about a rash on her chest. The doctor asks to take a look, so she removes her shirt, revealing a large, red 'H' on her skin. Believing this to be a case of contact dermatitis, the doctor asks her what could have caused this. "Well", she said, ... read more

“Hey you got the eggs, ma?”

That covered her legs. She went to a dermatologist and he said

"What you have is very rare but easily cured. Take a bath in milk for 3 nights and it will go away."

The woman went home and called the local grocery store and said
"I would like to buy 40 gallons of milk to bathe in."... read more