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Chiropractor Jokes

What do you call a chiropractor that loves his job?

A crack addict.

I never believed that chiropractors could solve my back problems

2 weeks later, I stand corrected

My chiropractor is serious as hell

But he still cracks me up

My chiropractor and I got into a terrible fight in the middle of my neck treatment.

Now I have to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder.

I had to quit going to the chiropractor ...

I felt he was always trying to manipulate me.

What's the difference between a chiropractor and a proctologist?

You go to one if you need your finger cracked and the other if you need your crack fingered.

Did you hear about the chiropractor who got in trouble with the IRS?

It was for back taxes.

“But Quasimodo, what makes you think you need to see a chiropractor?”

“Oh, it’s just a hunch...”

Sorry.

What do you call two chiropractors who've got each other's backs?

Vertebros

The chiropractor and the lawyer

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."
...

What do a chiropractor, a comedian, and a druggie all have in common?

They all try their best to crack you up!





(i posted this to a different joke sub a few hours ago... first time poster, hope i'm following community guidelines)

I go to the chiropractor because my wife told me to.

At least I assume that's what she meant when she said, "Prove to me you have a spine."

Bugs Bunny meets a chiropractor

For the first time ever, somebody called the chiropractor "doc."

A chiropractor said he could fix my paraplegia. I told him it was impossible.

I stand corrected.

I used to not believe in chiropractors...

But now, I stand corrected.

People always ask what's so special about my chiropractor. I tell them she's so funny ...

She cracks me up.

Good friends are like chiropractors.

They have your back and set you straight.

Yo mama so old

Her chiropractor a paleontologist

Every time I go to a new chiropractor

Every time go to a new chiropractor I have to tell them my twisted back story.

Anyone need some old copies of Chiropractor Monthly?

I have lots of back issues.

A man walks up to a chiropractor

and says, “doc my back is fine!”
the chiropractor then proceeds to crack his back in several places. Afterwards, the man feels relief and is standing several inches taller. He says “I stand corrected”

What happens when an NFL player is denied a chiropractor?

Crackback block

Chiropractors should be hired to cure all ails, since we know laughter is the best medicine and….

….. they really just crack you up.

My chiropractor said he's not my friend...

but he's always got my back.

Have you heard of the good-looking chiropractor who fixes neck injuries?

She's a head turner

Why did the composer go to the chiropractor?

Because he had Bach problems

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

chiropractors and police officers

What's the difference between a chiropractor and a police officer? One takes a crack at it and then the customer goes home, and the other takes a crack addict and throws him in jail for a very long time. But it's not all differences though. They both offer temporary relief with not much data to prov...

Does anyone remember the joke I made about the Chiropractor?

It was about a weak back.

My chiropractor said he couldn't decide which vertebrae to crack.

Guess he had a bone to pick with me.

Bugs Bunny goes to a medical convention

He meets a cardiologist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a dentist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a chiropractor, and says "what's up?"

I watched a movie called "The Adjustment," about a Chiropractor who quits, goes back to school and becomes an famous Orthopedic Spine Surgeon. I didn't really like it.

Too much backstory.

My chiropractor says I have the spine of a 60 year old

I still have my own spine too, but it's good to have a spare

How are chiropractors like Pringles?

Once they pop, the fun don't stop!

I put all my copies of Chiropractors Weekly on eBay

I have loads of back issues.

Why was the chiropractor a good interrogator?

He always got the suspect to crack.

I turn heads every time I go to work

Makes sense, I'm a chiropractor.

What's a chiropractor's favorite food?

Baby crack ribs.

My chiropractor's a funny guy

He cracks me up all the time.

What do chiropractors and comedians have in common?

They both crack people up.

Police are asking the public to be on the look out for a homicidal chiropractor.

The Chief reports that the best line of defense is to watch your back.

Went to see my chiropractor for the first time in a long time.

First thing he said when I walked into his office was "Glad to see your back!"

I didn’t think the Chiropractor would improve my posture...

... However, I stand corrected

A friend and I went to a chiropractor exam and we had to unscramble the letters PEINS

He wrote SPINE, he's a chiropractor now and I spend all my time on reddit.

My dad works as a chiropractor and sees two patients at once.

Back to back.

Why is it best to visit your chiropractor for your fetishes?

Because they will help you work out your kinks.

What part of the body did the chiropractor fix when Eminem came in?

♪ *Shady's back* ♪

To whomever I got into an argument with about going to the chiropractor,

I stand corrected.

You wanna know the most HUMOROUS person I know?

My Chiropractor, he really cracks me up

My chiropractor makes me feel like a Rice Krispy treat

But that just may be the marshmallow spread he rubs all over me

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Chiropractor Walks Into a Bar

A chiropractor walks into a bar. He finds a seat near the bartender and orders a beer. He takes a sip then notices an old friend of his is seated next to him. He turns to his side. "Hey George! How have you been man?". They catch up over a few beers. Eventually, the chiropractor asks, "So what have ...

What’s a chiropractor’s favorite type of drug

Crack

My chiropractor recently started doing stand up comedy

He really cracks me up.

I told my chiropractor that my spine was already in alignment, but he proved me wrong.

Now I stand corrected.

A thread of all the best jokes Siri has ever told me.

One day I was looking for creative task avoidance tactics, so I asked Siri to tell me a joke. Here are some of the best she had:

1. Whiteboards are quite remarkable.

2. Pavlov’s hair wasn’t always so silky. He had to condition it.

3. Did you hear about the band called 1023MB? Th...

My dad is a pediatric chiropractor

He’s never done anything too major but he’s really good with minor adjustments.

A man walks into a chiropractor's office...

A man walks into a chiropractor's office and says, " doc, youve got to help me...I think I'm a moth." Doc says, "I can't help you, youve got to see a psychiatrist." Man says, "yes, I know." "Then why did you come here?" "The light was on."

Why did the chiropractor have trouble waiting behind people?

Because he didn't know what alignment.

I hope this one cracks you up!

Wife: I’m just going to the chiropractor so he can fix my back.

Husband: Ask him to sort out your front while you’re there.

I used to go to the Chiropractor once a week...

But I stopped going because I was afraid I’d get addicted to crack.

What is a chiropractor's favorite cereal?

Rice Krispies (Snap, Crackle and Pop)

One liners about professions ?

Example, I would have been a doctor but I didn’t have the patience. Or, trained as a chiropractor but I couldn’t crack it.

Anyone got any more ?

How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one. But it takes about 8-10 visits.

Don't ever let a chiropractor tell u a joke.

It'll hit your funny bone.

Chiropractors should become interrogators

Because their patients crack easily under pressure.

I'm not exactly sure why my posture is so bad but I have a hunch.

I was skeptical when my chiropractor said she could fix it but I stand corrected.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three professions

Three people, each with a different profession discuss their job titles.

'I'm a chiropractor' says the first 'or "chiro" for short' .

'I'm a physiotherapist' says the second 'or "physio" for short'.

'I'm a psychologist' says the third 'Can we talk about something else?'

I went to the chiropractor for an adjustment and left with the worst pain in my neck

I don't recommend Dr. Acula.

A duck walks into a chiropractor‘s office

„I‘d like to get my bones quacked.“

I was trying to make my chiropractor laugh yesterday..

But he was the one cracking me up.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little medical joke

The South African Medical Association has weighed in on the new National Health Insurance proposals.

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thoug...

Where did da Vinci visit after painting the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel?

Mostly the chiropractor's office

I went to a chyropracter today

Oops, I meant a chiropractor. I stand corrected.

I used to date this pirate chiropractor...

.. but I broke up with her because she was holding me back.

What kind of music do chiropractors like?

Hip hop.

What kind of music does the grim reaper like? Death metal and Soul.

I'm sorry.

How many Chiropractors does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just the one, but it'll take three visits a week for the first few weeks, once a week for a month, then once a month for as long as you choose.

I heard it was medically impossible for a quack doctor to make me straight

But my chiropractor managed to realign my spine.

He was kinda cute too.

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