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Chiropractor Jokes

I never believed that chiropractors could solve my back problems

2 weeks later, I stand corrected

My chiropractor is serious as hell

But he still cracks me up

Did you hear about the chiropractor who got in trouble with the IRS?

It was for back taxes.

What's the difference between a chiropractor and a proctologist?

You go to one if you need your finger cracked and the other if you need your crack fingered.

My chiropractor and I got into a terrible fight in the middle of my neck treatment.

Now I have to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder.

“But Quasimodo, what makes you think you need to see a chiropractor?”

“Oh, it’s just a hunch...”

Sorry.

The chiropractor and the lawyer

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."
...

What do you call two chiropractors who've got each other's backs?

Vertebros

I go to the chiropractor because my wife told me to.

At least I assume that's what she meant when she said, "Prove to me you have a spine."

What do a chiropractor, a comedian, and a druggie all have in common?

They all try their best to crack you up!





(i posted this to a different joke sub a few hours ago... first time poster, hope i'm following community guidelines)

I had to quit going to the chiropractor ...

I felt he was always trying to manipulate me.

Have you heard of the good-looking chiropractor who fixes neck injuries?

She's a head turner

Why did the dominatrix go to the chiropractor?

She had a kink in her neck

Did you hear the one about the extremely adaptable chiropractor to insects?

They were great at making adjustments on the fly.

People always ask what's so special about my chiropractor. I tell them she's so funny ...

She cracks me up.

Every time I go to a new chiropractor

Every time go to a new chiropractor I have to tell them my twisted back story.

My chiropractor said he's not my friend...

but he's always got my back.

Anyone need some old copies of Chiropractor Monthly?

I have lots of back issues.

Why did the composer go to the chiropractor?

Because he had Bach problems

Does anyone remember the joke I made about the Chiropractor?

It was about a weak back.

A chiropractor said he could fix my paraplegia. I told him it was impossible.

I stand corrected.

Yo mama so old

Her chiropractor a paleontologist

I admit I was wrong about how good my chiropractor is.

I stand corrected.

A man walks up to a chiropractor

and says, “doc my back is fine!”
the chiropractor then proceeds to crack his back in several places. Afterwards, the man feels relief and is standing several inches taller. He says “I stand corrected”

My chiropractor says I have the spine of a 60 year old

I still have my own spine too, but it's good to have a spare

Went to see my chiropractor for the first time in a long time.

First thing he said when I walked into his office was "Glad to see your back!"

What part of the body did the chiropractor fix when Eminem came in?

♪ *Shady's back* ♪

Good friends are like chiropractors.

They have your back and set you straight.

I turn heads every time I go to work

Makes sense, I'm a chiropractor.

How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.

I told my chiropractor that my spine was already in alignment, but he proved me wrong.

Now I stand corrected.

My chiropractor said he couldn't decide which vertebrae to crack.

Guess he had a bone to pick with me.

I watched a movie called "The Adjustment," about a Chiropractor who quits, goes back to school and becomes an famous Orthopedic Spine Surgeon. I didn't really like it.

Too much backstory.

Police are asking the public to be on the look out for a homicidal chiropractor.

The Chief reports that the best line of defense is to watch your back.

To whomever I got into an argument with about going to the chiropractor,

I stand corrected.

I didn’t think the Chiropractor would improve my posture...

... However, I stand corrected

What’s a chiropractor’s favorite type of drug

Crack

Why is it best to visit your chiropractor for your fetishes?

Because they will help you work out your kinks.

What do you call a chiropractor that loves his job?

A crack addict

A friend and I went to a chiropractor exam and we had to unscramble the letters PEINS

He wrote SPINE, he's a chiropractor now and I spend all my time on reddit.

My dad works as a chiropractor and sees two patients at once.

Back to back.

My dad is a pediatric chiropractor

He’s never done anything too major but he’s really good with minor adjustments.

Don't ever let a chiropractor tell u a joke.

It'll hit your funny bone.

You wanna know the most HUMOROUS person I know?

My Chiropractor, he really cracks me up

Why did Patrick Dempsey become a chiropractor?

Because he has a decade's worth of experience pretending to be a doctor.

Bugs Bunny meets a chiropractor

For the first time ever, somebody called the chiropractor "doc."

My chiropractor makes me feel like a Rice Krispy treat

But that just may be the marshmallow spread he rubs all over me

I used to go to the Chiropractor once a week...

But I stopped going because I was afraid I’d get addicted to crack.

I used to not believe in chiropractors...

But now, I stand corrected.

On our first date my wife wanted to know my back story.

Told her it’s mostly ibuprofen and visits to the chiropractor.

My chiropractor recently started doing stand up comedy

He really cracks me up.

Wife: I’m just going to the chiropractor so he can fix my back.

Husband: Ask him to sort out your front while you’re there.

I went to the chiropractor for an adjustment and left with the worst pain in my neck

I don't recommend Dr. Acula.

A duck walks into a chiropractor‘s office

„I‘d like to get my bones quacked.“

I was trying to make my chiropractor laugh yesterday..

But he was the one cracking me up.

What do chiropractors and comedians have in common?

They both crack people up.

Chiropractors should become interrogators

Because their patients crack easily under pressure.

A man walks into a chiropractor's office...

A man walks into a chiropractor's office and says, " doc, youve got to help me...I think I'm a moth." Doc says, "I can't help you, youve got to see a psychiatrist." Man says, "yes, I know." "Then why did you come here?" "The light was on."

I used to date this pirate chiropractor...

.. but I broke up with her because she was holding me back.

My chiropractor's a funny guy

He cracks me up all the time.

A thread of all the best jokes Siri has ever told me.

One day I was looking for creative task avoidance tactics, so I asked Siri to tell me a joke. Here are some of the best she had:

1. Whiteboards are quite remarkable.

2. Pavlov’s hair wasn’t always so silky. He had to condition it.

3. Did you hear about the band called 1023MB? Th...

Chiropractors should be hired to cure all ails, since we know laughter is the best medicine and….

….. they really just crack you up.

What is a chiropractor's favorite cereal?

Rice Krispies (Snap, Crackle and Pop)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three professions

Three people, each with a different profession discuss their job titles.

'I'm a chiropractor' says the first 'or "chiro" for short' .

'I'm a physiotherapist' says the second 'or "physio" for short'.

'I'm a psychologist' says the third 'Can we talk about something else?'

What's a chiropractor's favorite food?

Baby crack ribs.

One liners about professions ?

Example, I would have been a doctor but I didn’t have the patience. Or, trained as a chiropractor but I couldn’t crack it.

Anyone got any more ?

I'm not exactly sure why my posture is so bad but I have a hunch.

I was skeptical when my chiropractor said she could fix it but I stand corrected.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A little medical joke

The South African Medical Association has weighed in on the new National Health Insurance proposals.

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had a sort of a gut feeling about it, but the neurologists thoug...

I went to a chyropracter today

Oops, I meant a chiropractor. I stand corrected.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

chiropractors and police officers

What's the difference between a chiropractor and a police officer? One takes a crack at it and then the customer goes home, and the other takes a crack addict and throws him in jail for a very long time. But it's not all differences though. They both offer temporary relief with not much data to prov...

Bugs Bunny goes to a medical convention

He meets a cardiologist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a dentist, and says "what's up, doc?"

He meets a chiropractor, and says "what's up?"

What kind of music do chiropractors like?

Hip hop.

What kind of music does the grim reaper like? Death metal and Soul.

I'm sorry.

I heard it was medically impossible for a quack doctor to make me straight

But my chiropractor managed to realign my spine.

He was kinda cute too.

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