UPJOKE
courgettepumpkincucumbersummer squashmarrowfruitsquashpotatoesonionseggplantceleryunpeeledasparagusradishescauliflower

Zucchini Jokes

What do you call a hairy zucchini with an attitude?

Sas-squash

What do eggplants, zucchini and cucumber all have in common ?

none of them looks like a peach

What is a zucchini's favorite sport?

Squash!

Is this a zucchini in my pocket, or am I...

...(username)

Why did Sean Connery throw away his zucchini?

Courgette was rotten

What's the difference between squash and zucchini?

You can't zucchini bugs!

A family-friendly take on the age old "jam VS jelly" joke.

What did the Zucchini say when it got stepped on?

*squash*

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old Italian man and his three sons...

NSFW (Best if delivered in an eccentric Italian accent with all the gestures)

So this old Italian man has 3 sons, 2 of them quite fat and 1 skinny.

He asks his first son "a-Mario! Why you-a so fat?" Mario says "oh but-a papa, I like-a the linguini!" His papa say "but-a Mario! You take...

Did you hear about the woman who left a zucchini in her car while she went shopping?

When she got back, someone had broken in and left her three more.

For women, it's called a Bikini Wax. For men, it's called

A Zucchini Wax!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a group of students recently did an experiment with results that showed zucchinis can actually improve your memory...

That’s great and all but I just feel sorry for the guy who had to get a zucchini shoved up his ass because he’s never gonna forget it.

My flirtatious neighbor called me and said that she bought too many zucchinis and ended up making two cheese and zucchini pies. She said I was welcome to come over and take one, and she also had some left over herbs that I could have.

So I went over, and she told she had just finished reading a Cosmo article called "which traffic sign are you?"



"Which traffic sign would your ideal woman be?" she asked me seductively.



I said " Ain't no particular sign I'm more compatible with I just want your extra t...

What’s a Jawa’s favourite vegetable?

Zucchini!

What's a Jawa's favorite type of bread?

ZUCCHINI!

What do zookeepers take care of?

Zucchini’s.

My 4 year old told me this. I think he made it up but who knows.

What do vegans wear when going to the pool?

A zucchini.

A guy starts his first day at a bakery...

The boss says, "We're a healthy, whole-food bakery, so we put vegetables in every type of bread that we make." He shows the new guy to the back room, where there are rows of file cabinets with pictures of vegetables on them.

"Here's where we keep the carrot dough," the boss says, opening a fi...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.