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Chives Jokes

My waiter asked, "would you like sour cream, bacon and chives on your potato?"

"That's a loaded question."

I was walking by the fridge last night and I thought I could hear the spring onions singing a BeeGees song.

Turns out it was just the chives talking.

A man opened his fridge and swore he heard two onions singing a Bee Gees song.

After closer inspection, he realized it was just chives talking.

If a vegan accidentally eats meat...

Do they break out in chives?

The Master Chef

A master chef brags to another man that he has at long last created the perfect dish. A dish so delicious that no man alive could resist it culinary divinity.

The man asks how such a dish is possible.

The chef responds that the secret is his artfully crafted blend of herbs and spices t...

Son walks into the living room and says to his Dad

"Dad I think im going crazy, every time I walk past the fridge I can hear the Bee Gees"...
"Oh thats nothing" replies the Dad, "its just the chives talking".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Family First (original joke)

Mr. Scott Lood was a poor little farmer from Illinois who paid the bills by churning butter all day and all night. He came from a family of dairy farmers: his father was a cream maker, and his father before him a cheese maker. There was little money to be made in this line of work- so little in fact...

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