Hi, I'm Buzz Aldrin. Second person to step on the moon.

Neil before me.

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I walked into our bedroom and stepped on my wife’s bra

It was a boobie trap

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Everyone knows what Neil Armstrong said as he stepped onto the moon, but few people know what he said as he boarded the lander to take off- "Good luck Mr. Kowalski."

Years later when a biographer asked him about it, Armstrong told him about a time he heard his neighbors having a huge fight.

Mrs. Kowalski was really tearing into her husband, Neil could hear her yelling from clear across his yard. Curious, he snuck closer to the window of their house just ...

What do you call a monkey that stepped on a minefield?

A Ba-boom

I lost my watch at a party once. An hour later I saw some guy stepping on it while he was harassing some woman at that party. Infuriated, I immediately went over, punched him and broke his nose.

No one does that to a woman, not on my watch...

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I saw two kids fighting on the elementary school playground and being the only adult around, I had to step in...

Little bastards didn’t stand a chance…

Just heard that Harry is thinking of taking up painting full time after stepping down from the Royal family.

He'll be the artist formerly known as Prince.

What did one dividing cell say to its sibling when they stepped on their foot?

Mitosis!

I have a step ladder.

I never knew my real ladder. Last I heard he was in a twelve step program.

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In the event of a fire, what steps should you take?

Fucking large ones

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A man steps into a brothel (nsfw)

He approaches the head mistress and says what can I get for $5? The head mistress takes him to a room with a morbidly obese woman. He doesn't enjoy it but it got the job done.

Next week he goes back and tells the mistress he only has $4 this time so she takes him to a room with a chicken in...

I was walking in the park today and I stepped on something brown and sticky. What was it?

A stick

A priest walks in to his stock broker’s office. When their business is concluded, the broker sighs and says, “Father, I must confess for I have sinned. I once cheated on my wife.” The priest nods his head and says, “there’s nothing I can do here, we will have to step outside.”

Confused, but eager to get it off his chest, the broker leads him to the door. As soon as they pass through the exit, the priest says, “Don’t worry, my son. Say three Hail Marys and don’t do it again.” The broker is relieved, but also curious. “Father, why couldn’t we do this in my office?”
...

When I was a little boy, a strange man stepped out of a time machine and punched me for no reason.

Now at last I've managed to invent a time machine of my own, so I'm going to go back to when *he* was a little boy so I can punch him and see how he likes it!

What do you say when your sister steps on your toe?

Mitosis

I got a new step ladder.......

I used to have a real ladder.....One I could look up to. Who at one time could support 3 people but now is in the 12 step program. I learned if you wanna reach new heights you got to have something strong to lean on. Otherwise you might fall and not get back up.

3 women die and go to heaven. The only rule? Do NOT step on a duck.

3 women die and go to heaven. God tells them that they are free to do as they please, but there is only one rule. Never. Step. On. A. Duck. Seems easy enough.

The next day the first woman steps on a duck. POOF! She is suddenly handcuffed to a really ugly guy. The other 2 women make sure to be...

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A man and woman step onto an elevator

after the doors close, the man leans into the woman and asks "can I smell your vagina?" shocked, the woman screams "No, you cannot" "Oh" the man replies, "then it must be your feet"

Fitness experts recommend walking 10,000 steps per day to remain healthy.

That is an awful lot of trips to the fridge.

One time I saw a kid being bullied by 4 kids so i decided to step in

He didn't stand a chance against all 5 of us

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Me Tarzan, you Jane...

When Jane first met Tarzan in the jungle, she was instantly attracted to him and during her questions about his life, she asked him if he had ever had sex.

"Tarzan not know sex." he replied.

Jane explained to him what it was.

Tarzan said, "Ohhh...Tarzan use knot hole in trunk ...

A woman steps in front of a bus and dies instantly.

She finds herself at the pearly gates, being greeted by God himself.



He looks the woman up and down, and says "Hm... Strange. It's not your time! I'm sending you back."

"Sending me back? How long until it IS my time?" she asks.

"Worry not, my child. You have many, many m...

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I was walking along the other day and stepped in dog shit.

As I was wiping my shoe, I watched another guy also step in it. I said to him "I just did that".

He walked over, punched me in the face and screamed, "You disgusting bastard!".

Harry and Meghan announced that they were stepping away from the royal family to focus on their work...

This is the first time someone is quitting their family to spend more time with their job

There’s a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming around the corner and heads straight for him.

The man walks faster, trying to hurry across the street, but the car changes lanes and is still coming at him.


So the guy turns around to go back, but the car changes lanes again and is still coming at him. By now, the car is so close and the man so scared that he just freezes and stops...

What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?

Mitosis!

Sorry if it’s been posted before but my little cousin just told me this and I died laughing

I remember doing security at the Brits a few years back when it all kicked off between Steps and Jamiroquai

I was the only thing between H and JK

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A man with no arms and no legs is sitting on the beach, thinking deeply about his life.

As he lays there, unable to move, he thinks about all the rejection he has faced. Countless women, scared off by his grotesque appearance, have avoided all contact with him. Never been kissed, never been loved.


As he reflects on his sad, lonely existence, a beautiful, busty young lady, ...

A husband and wife visit a marriage counselor. First, the wife speaks to the counselor alone.

The counselor asks her, “You say you’ve been married 20 years. So what seems to be the problem?”

“The wife replies, “It’s my husband. He’s driving me crazy! I’m going to leave him if he continues!”
“How does he drive you crazy?”
“For 20 years,” she says, “he’s been doing these stupid th...

What steps would you take if a bull chased you?

Big ones.

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An army recruit steps into his base for the first time

He he’s greeted by his Commanding Officer.

“Hey welcome to the base rookie as you can see we have just about everything pools, restrooms, weight rooms and more”.

The rookie looks him in the the eye.

“ So you have just about everything to fulfill all my needs”.

“Yeah just ...

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Walls of youth

A fifteen year old Amish boy and his father took an outing to a shopping mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.
The boy asked, 'What is this Father?'

The father responded, 'S...

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Starts with an F and end with K

A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"

Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"

Ms. B...

Don't step on a duck

St. Peter is assisting applicants to heaven three at a time. He's leading the latest trio around, showing them the best clouds, where to get the best harps, best wing cleaning service etc.

One guy has a complaint, though. "What's with all these ducks? They're everywhere and getting underfoo...

Euro-English

As a part of Brexit negotiations, the European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will remain the official language of the European Union rather than German, which has been regarded by many as a better choice.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conced...

How to get ripped in 4 easy steps:

1. Stand on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side.
2. Hold a 5-lb potato sack in each hand, extend your arms straight out from your sides and hold them there as long as you can. Try to reach a full minute, and then relax. Each day you'll find that you can hold this po...

My step-dad told me it was pointless to apply to med school because "I was too stupid to be a doctor"

8 years later one of us is an unemployed loser with a drinking problem and the other is making six figures and going to Hawaii this weekend to renew his wedding vows with my mom.

My buddy Jacob is a bad driver. He got in a bad wreck. His car was totaled. The other car was totaled. He stepped out of his car and went to check on the other driver. He was fine.

Jacob said, "This is a miracle. Look at how bad our cars are and we are totally unscathed. Even still. I have this bottle of wine in my backseat which it still unbroken. This surely is a sign. We should toast". The other man agreed, it was a sign and a toast was in order. So Jacob popped the cork an...

My step mother came to me and demanded that I take all her clothes off.

So I took off her blouse.

She said, “Now off with the skirt.”

I did, and she continued, “Now take off my stockings.”

And when I did that, she said, “Now the bra and the panties.”

I took them off. She continued, “And don’t ever let me catch you wearing my stuff again!”

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A farmer with one cow lives in a tiny farm with his wife, and three sons.

One morning he stepped outside to milk the cow, only to find it stiff and unmistakenably dead in its meadow. The farmer drops down in despair.

'How am I supposed to support my family without our only source of income?', he exclaims. In utter disbelief he walks to the shed, grabs his shotgun, ...

I got a new step ladder today

My real ladder left me.

My pet frog is always one step ahead of me..

Whenever I read him jokes from this sub he just says ‘rrreddit’.

A bouquet of flowers

A man walks past a flower shop one day and thinks how he never buys flowers for his wife. So he steps in and orders a nice bouquet of flowers.

He comes home, rings the doorbell. His wife opens the door. He hands her the bouquet and she goes wild with excitement! She pulls him in, closes the d...

A step-to-step Guide on how to fall down stairs:

Step 1
Step 2
Step 3
Step 4
Step 6
Step 9
Step 16
Step 28

A man is driving late at night when his car breaks down in front of a remote Buddhist monastery.

He knocks on the door and the monks open it. He tells the monks about his situation, and how he can't call for a mechanic at those hours of the night, so he asks them if he can stay the night in the monastery. The monks happily agree, and give him a room with a bed to sleep on.

In the middle ...

When I'm fixing my house, I take out my step ladder...

...because I dont know my real ladder

A male potato chip steps up to the bar and buys a drink.

He sees two female potato chips sitting nearby. He says to the one female potato chip, "Excuse me. Are you Herr's or Frito Lay?"

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I just failed a fire safety course when they asked what steps I would take in case of an explosion.

Apparently “Fucking large ones” wasn’t an acceptable answer.

How do you get an Art Major off your front door step?

Pay for the PIZZA!

My girlfriend stepped on the scales recently and asked me to guess what they said.

I said "One at a time please"?

She was not amused.

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John gets pulled over on the highway for speeding...

John: "Is there a problem officer?"

Cop: "You exceeded 80 in 55 zone. May I see your license?"

John: "ahhhh, why don't I spare you the trouble, officer? I don't have a license, so I shouldn't be driving this car that I jacked from this dude I just killed. The gun I used is right here ...

A man stepped out of his house to go for his afternoon walk when he noticed his neighbor had two black eyes...

"Whatn' hell happened to you Frank?"

"Well, I was in church last Sunday and I noticed a lady in front of me had her dress stuck up in her buns so being the gentleman I am I reached down and pulled the dress free and she turned around and hit me between the eyes"he replied.

The neighbor...

Three women die and go to heaven. When they get there, St. Peter says: “We only have one rule here in heaven: don’t step on the ducks!”

So they enter heaven, and there are ducks all over the place. It is almost impossible not to step on a duck, and although they try their best to avoid them, the first woman accidentally steps on one.

Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest man she ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and s...

What a twist

Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

Teacher: 502.

Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

Teacher:No you can’t fit an elephant in a fridge!!

Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.

Student: How do you put a gir...

Two priests step into the communal shower, when they notice there's no soap. One says, "I'll go to my room and get two bars." He runs naked to the room, grabs the bars, but as he's running back, three nuns show up. Not knowing what else to do, he freezes like a statue...

The nuns look at the statue and say, "Such a beautiful figure, perfectly shaped!"

One of them, admiring its "toy soldier" decides do pull it.

The priest's reaction to the enormous pain makes him drop one of the soap bars, but he holds his pose.

The nun conclude then, that it's n...

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my step-sister walked in on me while I was masturbating.

my step-sister walked in on me while I was masturbating and incredulously asked "Are you seriously masturbating in here?"

I told her no, it was more like a hobby.

The President is walking out of the White House and heading toward his limo, when a possible assassin steps forward and aims a gun.

A secret service agent, new on the job, shouts “Mickey Mouse!” This startles the would be assassin and he is captured. Later, the secret service agent’s supervisor takes him aside and asks, “What in the hell made you shout 'Mickey Mouse'?” Blushing, the agent replies, “I got nervous. I meant to shou...

What did the Pink Panther say when he stepped on an ant?

Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant...

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I stepped outside for a smoke, and a guy in a wheelchair rolled up and said “why do you smoke if you don’t have to?”

So I asked him, “What the fuck are you wearing shoes for?”

An elderly Catholic man is hit by a bus . . .

A bus on a busy street struck a Catholic man.

He was lying near death on the sidewalk as a crowd gathered.

"A priest. Somebody get me a priest!" the man gasped.

Long seconds dragged on but no one stepped out of the crowd.

A policeman checked the crowd and finally yelled, ...

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BECOMING AMERICAN

Two Saudi brothers come to America and one buys a house on the west coast and the other on the east coast. They are so excited about being Americans and during their goodbyes they make a $10,000 bet: in two months they will meet again and the one that is the most American wins.

Two months pas...

The 2 steps to success in life

1.Never tell anyone your biggest secret

Credit to u/Draiu

John got a job at the local prison. On his first day, he saw a large, muscular man cranking a shaft inside of his cell. He turned to one of his fellow guards and asked, “Who’s that guy?”, referring to the man cranking the shaft.

“That’s Khan Drea. He’s in here for life, but the warden decided...

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Twelve priests were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up in a straight row, totally nude in a garden, while a sexy and beautiful big breasted nude model danced before them.

Each priest had a small bell attached to his penis and they were told that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of them would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity.
The beautiful model danced before the first candidate with no reaction. She proceeded do...

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The train under the tree.

So there's a boy on Christmas playing with a toy train set beneath the Christmas tree. He sends the train around and stops it at the little train station and says, "All you fuckers getting on, get on, all your fuckers getting off, get off."

Well his mom hears him from the kitchen and steps in...

Dad is listening to his daughter say her prayers before bedtime

She says - God bless mommy and god bless daddy and god bless grandma and... goodbye grandpa.
He asks her - why did you say that?
I don't know, I just felt like saying it.
The next day, grandpa drops dead. Wow, thinks dad, that's an odd coincidence.
A month later at bedtime, the daughter ...

A woman shoots her husband for stepping on the clean floor

A police officer jumps into his squad car and calls the station.

“I have an interesting case here,” he says. “A woman shot her husband for stepping on the floor she just mopped.”

“Have you arrested her?” asks the sergeant.

“No, not yet. The floor’s still wet.”

Step 1: Receive message from God.

Step 2: Spread God's message to the people.

Step 3: ???

Step 4: Prophet!

A man was struck by a bus on a busy street.

He knew his injuries were too severe to survive so, being a devout Catholic, he called for a priest to pray for him in his last moments. The surrounding crowd frantically searched the area for a priest, but none could be found. Finally, an elderly Jewish man stepped out of the crowd. “Now I’m not a ...

I just found out how to make easy money with a three step plan.

Step 1. Get a job.
Step 2. Go to your job and do work.
Step 3. Get money.

How to make holy water in two easy steps

1) Take a pan of water and set it on the stove

2) Boil the hell out of it

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A woman visits a flower shop to get some flowers for her mother.

As she's perusing, she notices the most gorgeous rose she's ever seen sitting next to the cashier, and inquires about its origin.

"Oh, sorry," the cashier replies. "That one's not for sale. I got that as a gift from a fellow florist for hooking him up with a woman I met yesterday."

"Y...

Why do cats like to step on computer keyboards?

jfjkl;fdasljki;l nkfskllkteqjpteqjwtjokkkkkkkllllll..

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I used to be one of the best fluffers in porno, but eventually, I had to step down.

The competition was too stiff.

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An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading a tired old mule.

The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat.

He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.

As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in...

I fell off a 50ft ladder at work today

Luckily I was only on the first step

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A farmer wakes up to discover that his precious Alpine goat had died overnight.

Since he loved that goat very deeply, he decided to jump into the river by his house and commit suicide. Soon after, his wife woke up, and discovered his note. She too, followed in his steps and jumped into the river.

Their younger son woke up to find both of his parents dead, and seeing no ...

i just stepped on a cornflake

now, i'm officially a cereal killer

Drunk Irishman

Paddy had been drinking at his local Dublin pub all day and most of the night celebrating St Patrick's Day. Mick, the bartender says, 'You'll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy'. Paddy replies, 'OK Mick, I'll be on my way then'. Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his...

God is travelling around the world to spread his religon

He gets to India and asks the public, 'Will you take my commandments to be yours?' The public says no and decides to try elsewhere.

He gets to China and asks, 'Will you follow my commandments?' And the public replies no.

He gets to Israel and asks, 'Will you take my commandments?' The ...

I fell off my step-ladder and hurt myself!

I bet my *real* ladder would have caught me.

Jim’s car is swerving all over the road so a cop pulls him over

“Step out of the car” says the cop, “I am going to need you to take a  breathalyzer test.”

“I can’t”, Jim responds “You see I have very bad asthma, that can set off an attack.”

“Alright,” says the cop, “then you’re going to have to take a blood test.” “

Can’t do that either,” ...

(My first joke)A cat kept taking a pee on the steps to my porch. So i call my father-in-law and ask him how to get rid of it,

He says "dig a 2 foot deep hole, fill it half way with ash. Get a can of pees and put some around the freshly dug hole. When the cat comes to take a pee, kick it in the ash-hole"

Go easy on me i loled when i was told this a few years back.

A drunk man falls down the front steps of the W Hotel in New York.

He lands at the feet of a cab driver waiting for his next fare. The drunk man stands up and says, “Take me to the W Hotel!”



The cabby looks at the drunk man and tells him, “Buddy, you’re at the W Hotel.”



Perfect,” the man says, handing the driver a twenty-dollar bill, “...

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An 18 year-old Italian girl tells her mother she missed her period for two moths.

Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Fer...

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Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing. St. Peter steps up to the tee on a par three and hits one long and straight. It reaches the green. Jesus is up next. He slices it. It heads over the fence into traffic on an adjacent street.

Bounces off a truck, onto the roof of a nearby shack and into the rain gutter, down the drain spout and onto a lilly pad at the edge of a lake. A frog jumps up and snatches the ball in his mouth. An eagle swoops down, grabs the frog. As the eagle flies over the green, the frog croaks and drops the b...

A man with a new sports car was speeding down an empty road late at night.

Suddenly he heard sirens behind him. He looked in his rearview mirror to see the flashing lights of a police car. The man thought to himself “I can outrun this guy.” And stepped on the accelerator. He kept accelerating. 90 miles an hour. 100. 110. 120.

After a few minutes he realized how stup...

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Three men crash land on a desert island, 3 days later they find a magic lamp in the sand on the beach

>**this joke works best if you do the actions when you're telling it**

The men get very excited about the lamp and as they dust the sand away it hums and buzzes before a genie emerges in a puff of blue smoke.

"You have freed me from my prison," says the Genie, "For this, I will give...

An astronaut is the first to step onto an alien planet.

An astronaut is the first to step onto an alien planet. The alien's are so excited that they change all their signs to English, and even rename some of their places and landmarks after Human places and landmarks and things.
The astronaut decides the first place he wants to go is a pub. He sees ...

The 3 step Chinese torture

A guy comes to a Chinese house in the middle of nowhere. Being late he ask to sleep in their house. The dad accepts but says: "If you sleep with my daughter I will use the 3 step Chinese torture on you!"

The guy accepts and enters the house. The daughter is stunning beautiful. Also she flirts...

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3 men are standing in front of Heaven's Door waiting to be let in when St. Peter says, "Sorry, boys, but Heaven has met their quota for the day

; however, if you tell me how you died and it is interesting enough, I will let you in."

The first man says, " I am a respectable businessman who lives with my wife in a condo on the 12th floor of The Rains Building. I suspected that my wife has been cheating on me, so I left work two hours e...

In a crowded New York City at a busy bus stop,

A woman who was waiting for a bus was wearing a tight leather skirt.

As the bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus. Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus d...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

And old english gentleman is sitting in his study.

Suddenly his buttler crashes in through the door and screams "SIR! We are flooding! There's water everywhere..."

"James! This is most irregular. Please leave and come in again with the dignity that is inherent to English gentlemen!"

The buttler bows himself out and then comes in agai...

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Heaven’s been getting pretty packed lately...

Heaven’s been getting pretty packed lately, so God came up with a solution to this. Everyone who died and goes to heaven must first get an interview with an angel, who would decide if their death was noble or not. If it was, they would be let inside, otherwise they would be sent to purgatory.
...

The 20 steps to falling down the stairs:

Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 3:

Step 5:

Step 8:

Step 15:

Step 20:

A blonde enters heaven.

God says "There are 100 steps on this staircase. On each step, I will tell you a joke. But if you laugh, you will be sent out of heaven never to return."

The blonde agrees. God tells the first joke, she doesn't laugh. Same thing happens for the second joke, and so on.

On the 99th step,...

Sometimes you have to step on people's toes if you want to progress in life.

Unless you hope to be a professional ballroom dancer.

How do you make Easter easier in just one simple step?

Replace the T with an I.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A blond, brunette and red head are all in the delivery room ready to give birth.

The doctor walks in and goes the the brunette and asks how she prefers to have sex.

When she replies "missionary" he guesses she'll have a boy. A few minutes later, the baby is born and it's a boy.

Then the doctor steps up to the red head and asks how she prefers to have sex.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was doing 65 in a 35 zone when a cop pulled me over.

Officer approaches the car. "License and registration, please."


"I would, officer, but...this car is stolen. Oh, and full disclosure, there's a loaded pistol in the glove box."


"Sir, I'm going to need you to step out of the car."


As I'm getting out, I also le...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

(NSFW) Two rednecks, Junior and Billy, are walking through the forest and stumble upon a sheep with Its head stuck in the fence

Junior Looks at Billy and says, “Ima fuck that sheep!” So he runs up behind the sheep, pulls down his pants and starts fuckin it. After a few minutes he steps back, pulls up his pants and walks back to Billy. Junior looks at Billy and Says “I’m sorry, do you want a turn Billy?”

Billy looks a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man walks into a bar

This is a long'un. Strap yourselves in.

A man walks into a bar and notices a large jar on the counter filled to the brim with cash, $50's, $20's. Must be a good few $thousand in the jar. The guy orders a drink and asks about the jar on the counter. "Oh that's for anyone who can beat the three...

A guy is driving through a snowstorm in Alaska when his car breaks down...

...so he gets it towed to the nearest mechanic. As he awaits the diagnosis he steps out for a smoke. He walks back in after smoking and a few moments later the mechanic comes out and says to him, "um...it looks like you blew a seal." To which the man responds, "oh nah, that's just some frost on m...

An officer and a lawyer were having a discussion in court.

Lawyer: "A woman shot her husband because he stepped on her freshly mopped floor."

Officer: "That is correct."

Lawyer: "Officer, can you explain why it took you 20 minutes to arrest the woman once you got there?"

Officer: "The floor was still wet."

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Kirkland Nutra Nuggets dog chow

for my loyal pet, Brista, and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probabl...

My alcoholic girlfriend got pregnant recently and it was really tough to find a 12 step plan for her

But then i remembered my mom's house has a pretty big staircase.

What does a dog do that his owner steps in?

Pants. The dog pants.



Why, what were you thinking of?

I like to take the elevator while my brother from another mother likes to take the stairs.

I guess he is more of a step-brother.

80,000 blondes meet in a football stadium for a "Blondes Are Not Stupid" Convention.

The leader says, "We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?"

A blonde gingerly works her way through the crowd and steps up to the stage.

The leader asks her, "What is 15 plus 15?"

After 15 or 20 seconds she says, "Eighteen!...

The Popes at the airport,

The popemobile broke down so he hails a taxi,

He demands the driver get him to the cathedral
in 10 minutes or less,

The driver says its impossible, the pope offers to drive,

The taxi driver considers the offer and eventually agrees and hops in the back seat,

The pope ...

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