UPJOKE
lengthmagnitudelargesmallresizewidthheightdiameterbigscalesmallnessmassnumberweightclass

Sizing Jokes

My grandfather could communicate with ghosts, who would often ask him about his clothes sizing.

He was a medium.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A gambler dies and goes to Heaven...

A professional gambler wins big and dies of an aneurysm. When he gets to the afterlife, he finds himself at the back of a miles-long line to get into Heaven.

Drawing on his experience, the gambler immediately thinks of a way to get ahead of everyone else. He taps the old man ahead of him on t...

I once had a job circus sizing elephants.

The pay was lowsy, but the tips were huge!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Man goes into a pharmacy

and asks the woman at the counter for a pack of condoms. She asks him what size he needed, and when he answered that he did not know, she directed him go into a room at the side of the counter and try his penis in the three holes in the plywood wall to see which fit the best.

As he made his ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The young bride approached her awaiting husband on their wedding night and demanded $20 for their first love-making encounter...

The young bride approached her awaiting husband on their wedding night and demanded $20 for their first love-making encounter.

In his highly aroused state, he readily agreed.

This scenario was repeated each time they made love for the next 30 years, him thinking it was a cute way for...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.