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What has 75 balls and screws old ladies?

Bingo

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One day a farmer buys a cock and brings it home, as soon as he lets the rooster go it screws all 150 hen and impresses the farmer.

One day a farmer buys a cock and brings it home, as soon as he lets the cock go it screws all 150 hens and impresses the farmer,
the next day the cock screws all the ducks and geese too. On the third day the farmer sees the cock laying on the ground passed out with the vultures circling overhead...

Where do screws that have been screwed too much go?

The strip club

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A farmer goes out and buys a new, young rooster. As soon as he brings him home, the young rooster rushes and screws all 150 of the farmers hens. The farmer is impressed.

At lunchtime, the young rooster again screws all 150 hens. The farmer is not just impressed anymore,he is worried. Next morning,not only is the rooster screwing the hens but he is screwing the turkeys,ducks even the cow. Later farmer looks out into the barnyard and finds the rooster stretched out, l...

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"Alright guys, we have lots of pictures to mount before the art gallery tonight. Like I said in the email, we'll have to use these adhesive hooks. Under no circumstances will you penetrate the wall with nails or screws. Tim, I've noticed you've already hung one picture. Great job.

Tim (hiding his drill and muttering under his breath): welp.. I screwed that up.

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to assure the public that they’re doing everything they can to fix the issue while the other screws the bulb into a faucet.

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Past me always screws over future me.

But honestly, future me is probably a dick. So fuck that guy.

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