Who else would like to see a puppet show, minus the puppets?

Let's see a show of hands.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Number one reason not to have sex with puppets?

... there's always strings attached.

(I know, I'm sorry, I'll see myself out, bye now)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Puppet Show

A youth group goes to a puppet show. Before the show begins, a man wearing a black turtleneck can be seen behind the stage putting his hand into each of the puppets for a moment and then moving on to the next one. Finally the lights go dark to signal the show is about to begin. When suddenly an 11 y...

So I bought Master of Puppets today

I noticed there was a song missing. When I asked the store clerk later about it, he said "Battery not included".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A black guy, white guy, asian guy and hand puppet are sitting in a bar...

The black guy says, "You know the thing about dating black girls? They're crazy in bed, but you can never trust them around other guys."

The white guy says, "White girls are cute, but they're always spoiled and high-maintenance."

The asian guy says, "Asian girls are intelligent, but th...

Broken puppets for sale...

No strings attached.

I'm surprised Metallica hasn't been on Sesame Street,

After all they are the Master of Puppets.

What is the difference between James Hetfield and Paula White?

One is a master of puppets, the other is a pastor of muppets.

Do you know who really likes to get fisted?

Hand puppets!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Topical Jokes (5/19)

Good evening, folks! It is once again time to relay the jokes.

First up, if you're not following this story, you're missing out. The IRS scandal continues to get stickier. According to a White House insider, President Obama learned about the IRS scandal by watching TV news. As shocking as tha...

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