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What does a clown and a pornstar have in common?

They both know how to juggle some serious balls.

An Oklahoma State Trooper pulls over a circus clown for speeding

The trooper asks the clown "Why were you driving so fast?" The clown says "I'm headed to Tulsa for a circus show and I don't want to be late." The trooper asks the clown "What do you do in the show?" "I'm a juggler" says the clown.

"Alright" says the trooper, "If you juggle for me here, I won...

Why don’t cannibals eat clowns?

Because they taste funny.

What's the difference between a clown and an athletic rabbit?

One is a little bit funny and the other is a little fit bunny

Two cannibals are eating a clown

Then one asks the other “does something taste funny to you?”

What do you call a clown after you've boiled it for 10 hours?

A laughing stock!

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An old man named Steve is walking down the street and sees a clown walking towards him.

"Hey look, a clown!" Steve says. "Do you think you could make me laugh?"

The clown says, "Not now, I'm tired. I want to go home."

"Oh come on!" says Steve. "Show me a magic trick you sissy! Make me feel young again!"

Steve won't quit harassing him, so the clown reluctantly agre...

My 4yo's first real joke: Why did the clown go to the doctor?

Because he was feeling funny!

#prouddadmoment

What do you call a big, prejudiced, scary clown?

A big It

Two cannibal clowns are eating Jerry Seinfeld..

One asks, "Does this taste funny to you?"

The other replies, "Nah, it's just bland.. maybe a little dry."

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You hear about that girl that only has sex with clowns?

She’s fucking bonkers.

How can you tell when a clown farts?

Because it smells funny.

So these three clowns were eating a cannibal.

One of them said "I think we started this joke wrong."

My wife dated a clown before she started going out with me.

I had some pretty big shoes to fill.

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It's said that guys with big feet have big penises, and guys with big cars have small penises

Now I understand why so many people are afraid pf clowns

My gf told me that I act like a clown

It was so unexpected and upsetting I stopped juggling and almost fell off my unicycle.

Where do clowns go to run?

*laughtrack*

Two clown cars crash in the middle of nowhere.

Over 50 died.

What do clowns fill their cars with?

Laughing gas!

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This has probably been made before, but I just thought of it after my mom, while doing her crossword puzzle, said aloud "fuel for a funny car" and I suggested laughing gas. It wasn't the right answer, unfortunately.

Update, the answer is "Nitro" which i...

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What’s the hardest part about having sex with a clown?

Cleaning the grease paint off your back

Please tag this nsfw I forgot how to.

Cyclists are like clowns

- They dress funny.

- They don't follow any rules.

- If anything bad happens to them, everyone laughs at them.

How many clowns can you fit in a Honda?

One more.

Two cannibals are eating a clown

Two cannibals are eating a clown and one says to the other,

You know i didn't think Boris Johnson would taste that good.

What's a rodeo clown's favorite type of bar?

A honky tonk!

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Did you hear about the model that fucked a clown?

It was pretty fucking funny.

I just read about a group of suicide bombers that were dressed like clowns.

It's a really messed up story, but credit where credit's due...at least someone's trying to put the fun back in fundamentalism

My father was the best clown of all time.

When he died, all his friends came to his funeral in one car.

What clown has killed more children than "It"?

Ronald McDonald.

The other day I was attacked by a gang of clowns

So I went straight for the juggler.

3 clowns are in a judge's courtroom.

The judge, a little thrown off by the individuals turns to the attractive girl clown and asks,
"Miss, what brings you to my courtroom today?"
The girl clown responds,
"I'm here because I was blowing bubbles!"
The judge, even more confused, turns to the second clown. This one being a very...

You’re going to clown college?

You can’t be serious.

An old woman is talking with a relative at her 4th husband's funeral

She says to the relative "he was a good man" the relative nodded she then said ya know I've been married for the 4th time and this is the last, the relative asked "what were your other husband's like" the woman said "my first husband was a banker, he was a hard working man". The relative asks "what ...

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Why did the clown take a bunch of laxatives?

For shits and giggles.

What’s the difference between a homeless clown and a scary clown?

One is penniless and the other is Pennywise.

Yesterday, a clown held the door open for me.

It was such a nice jester!

A little boy and a clown are walking through the woods at 3 am...

The little boy says, "Golly! It sure is dark and scary out here!"

"You think you're scared," says the clown. "I'm the one who has to walk home all alone..."

What do you call a drawing of a clown?

A comedy sketch.

I've been asked to take over as Chief Clown...

I've got some big shoes to fill.

A clown presents the new covid regulations.

Everyone dies laughing.

What did the shark say after eating a clown fish?

This tastes a little funny.

Dude, that scary clown followed us to Wales.

Welsh It.

The old man and Pagliacci

An old man deep in despair went to see his favorite comedian, the great clown Pagliacci.

After the show, the old man made his way backstage and found Pagliacci.

“Pagliacci,” the old man said. “I have always admired your work, and your set tonight was magnificent.”

“I’m humbled, ...

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

A man and his wife are sitting down to dinner.

“Ringling Brothers is coming to town this week,” she said. “The poster says they have a dancing bear. I always wanted to see one of those.”

“Maybe next year,” says the man. “Work’s really busy this week.”

The next night at dinner, t...

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I dated this mime/clown for a while.

After every argument, the silent treatment was awful, but the make-up sex was incredible.

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My girlfriend likes it when I dress up as scary clown when we have sex

I think she has a Stephen Kink.

Did you hear they invented an automatic pen and paper for clowns?

The joke writes itself

"Look Dad! The clowns are leaving the circus to go get food!"

"Son how many times do I have to tell you? Those are called *Senators* leaving the *Capitol*"

What do you call a clown that saves money by being homeless?

Penny wise

what did the shark said when he ate the clownfish

this tastes a bit funny

A guy took his small daughter with him to work one day...

After he introduced all the other employees to her she began to cry. He asked her what the matter was and she said, "You told Mom that you work with a bunch of clowns. Where are they?"

A baby clown fell down and broke a bone.

The doctor told the baby clown’s father that they broke the bone in between their shoulder and elbow.

The man laughs.

“Why would you laugh!?”

“Its humerus.”

My father who comes from a long line of clowns just retired and wants me to continue the family legacy.

I've got some big shoes to fill

What's the worst part about playing tag with a clown?

When the clown is it.

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A story is told that in the mid 1990s, two men go to visit a doctor who is acclaimed for his ability to treat melancholia.

"We can’t eat, we can’t sleep,” say the men. “We feel contantly miserable. Please help us, doctor.”

“Laughter is the best medicine, my friends,” says the doctor. “Take yourself off to The Gathering of the Juggalos, where you will find Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope of the Insane Clown Posse perf...

If you dressed up like a rodeo clown, broke into the capitol, and tried to destroy the democracy of the United States

You might be a redneck

I don't like that clown from IT.

He's always fooling around and cracking jokes instead of fixing our computers.

I read that the three most popular Halloween costumes this year are clown, pumpkin, and dinosaur.

I'm capitalizing on this trend by selling costumes of Trump.

Expert Marksman

Three snipers are out on the range, bragging about their skills.

“I can out-shoot either of you clowns. See that beer can out beyond the target?” The other two confirm. The first sniper lines up his shot, squeezes off a round and BOOM, can pops up in the air and lands 20 yards back.

...

What's red and smells?

Clown nose.

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What did Gordon Ramsay say when he caught a clown in bed with the Egyptian Sun God?

IT's fucking Ra

You all have heard about Joker, the Clown Prince of Crime.

But have you heard about his father who was Joking.

My friend swears he loves horror movies involving clowns

I'm not certain, but I think he means It.

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Maybe repost, but it is a fabulous joke so I'll risk it. (Long, and works better when spoken)

A man is waking up in the morning, when he reads in the newspaper that the circus is coming to town. So he decides to go and see. He gets into his seat and the show starts. He watches the lions, the elephants, the tight rope walkers, and at the end there's a clown insulting people in the audience. T...

A blind clown is asked to perform at a children’s hospital. He is led into the amputee ward and begins with some jokes, but not one child laughs.

“A song, perhaps,” he thinks. “That’ll cheer ‘em up!”
“Ifffffff you’re happy and you know it....”

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As told to me by an 85 year old shriner clown.

Little 8 year old Susie is in her back yard digging a hole. Her neighbor Mr. Johnson peeks over the fence and says "gee Susie, what's going on?"

Susie says "I'm digging a hole, it's pretty obvious."

Mr. Johnson asks "why are you digging a hole?"

Susie replies "I'm burying my gol...

I took my daughter to my office for, "Bring your kid to work day". BIG MISTAKE!

After meeting everyone she started getting cranky and began to cry. As everyone gathered around to try to console her, she looked at me and in a loud voice complained, "Where are all the clowns you tell me & mommy you work with everyday?"

What do a clown and someone who snores have in common?

Honk Shoe.... Honk Shoe..... Honk Shoe....

I asked a hitman for advice on how to kill a clown. He told me...

Go for the juggler.

Last night on the episode of "Criminal Minds" my wife was watching, the cops arrested a clown.

As a Dad of long standing, I'm happy to have seized the opportunity to yell "Don't try anything funny!"

How do you make a Clown cry

You throw a brick at it

What does a clown living in a sewer and a person working in technical support have in common?

They both are from IT

How do clowns measure their money?

Pennywise.

Daddy, can we go see the clowns again?

For the last time, Billy, we are not visiting congress again.

Death of a clown

Two cannibals came to his funeral. One tried to chew off a piece, and he said that it tasted funny. The other man just stared and remarked, “this is no laughing matter.”

A clown and a little kid were walking hand in hand down a dark deserted forest path and the little kid says "Gosh, it's spooky in here!"

And the clown says "What are you scared about? I gotta walk back all alone!"

A man goes on an overnight business trip, and hires a babysitter to watch his two kids. It's an easy job with good pay, but she's creeped out by the life-sized clown statue he has in his den.

That night, the man calls to see how things are going.

The babysitter says: "Everything's great, the kids have been wonderful. But I had to throw my coat over that clown statue in your den. No offense but it's really creepy."

Horrified, the man replies: "*What?! I don't have a den! Gra...

My friend asked me if I believe in killer clowns

I replied, "No doubt about IT"

The best insult ever is, "who is this clown?", because...

#1- You are calling them a clown
#2- You are saying they are not even a well known clown

What do you call a demon clown that is good with small amounts of money?

Pennywise.

Been think of opening a clown brothel,

Gonna call it “the funny bone.”

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My 80 yr-old uncle was caught planting secret listening devices in a hotel room while wearing a clown costume.

What a silly old bugger.

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Timmy just loves clowns. Favourite thing in the world.

He's got clown bed spread, posters in his room, the whole shabang. Totally idolizes them

One day, Timmy sees that the big top circus is coming to town. He gets so excited that, when it finally arrived, he camps outside the ticket booth, waitimg to get the best seat in the house. And when he g...

How do you get a clown off a swing set?

Hit him in the face with an axe.

What did sideshow Bob work as after he got fired from being a clown?

A bartender

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