UPJOKE
sodiumlithiumhydrogencalciummineralanioncarnallitemagnesiumisotopesoapseleniumperoxidemetalargonsymbol

I heard a joke about oxygen and potassium. I’d say it was pretty OK.

Yea, I also heard that sodium was under assault.

Oxygen and Potassium went on a date

It's totally OK

Last week Oxygen took potassium on a date and it was just OK

Then yesterday I saw Oxygen with a date with Magnesium and I was like OMg

Doctor: Our tests show you have no magnesium or potassium in your body.

Patient: 0MG, 0K

I asked my wife, “Did you know there’s a fruit you can eat that provides your daily requirement of potassium?”

My wife: That’s bananas.

Me : I know. I couldn’t believe it either.

which TV/movie character can use the power of the force and the power of potassium?

Bananakin Skywalker!

TIL "saltpeter" is a casual term for potassium nitrate.

The more you KNO...

A guy goes up to a Mexican and asks if he knew what the symbol for potassium was

“¿Que?”

Did you hear about the racist chemist?

He joined the Potassium Potassium Potassium

I have a friend whose favorite element is potassium.

I personally think it's "just 'K."

The alligator was low on potassium

So I ran to the gatorade

TIL a Goose's beak is composed of 4 elements: Hydrogen, Oxygen, Nitrogen, and Potassium.

HONK

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why are you afraid of Potassium peroxide?

Because it KO'd the shit out of U.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I dropped my mixture of fluorine, uranium, carbon, and potassium.

FUCK

Did you hear about the scientist who devoted his life to researching how to create potassium out of thin air?

Some could say... >!he’d gone bananas!<

I got my test results back. Turns out I was dangerously low on magnesium and potassium.

0MG 0K.

Oxygen and potassium went on a date...

...it went ok.

Oxygen and magnesium went on a date.

The other chemicals were like 'omg'!

Two noble gases went on a date.

There was no reaction.

Two protons went on a date.

There was no attraction.

Hydrogen and chlorine went on a date.

They felt...

Recently, monkeys escaped from an animal testing lab and broke into the adjacent chemistry lab. Some ingested potassium metal and exploded.

There were Rhesus pieces everywhere.

I knew a chemist who survived solely on oxygen and potassium.

When I asked him what he felt like, he said OK.

If bananas have potassium...

Does that mean potatoes have banassium?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This should be a standard response to chemistry jokes

Flourine Uranium Carbon Potassium

Yttrium Oxygen Uranium

Arsenic Sulphur Tungsten Iodine Phosphorus Einsteinium

:)

Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. ..

Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day.

Give a man a fish laced with potassium cyanide, and you feed him for a lifetime.

My dad said there'd been an explosion at the potassium factory.

K boomer.

Many years ago, St. Peter introduced some antimony trisulfide and potassium chlorate to a small stick of wood.

It was a match made in heaven.

I was hungry and low on potassium, He needed a device to help him weigh things, it seemed like a fair trade...

Banana for scale

I was told that the friendship between sodium, potassium, and oxygen was bad.

I said, "Na. Pretty sure it is OK."

What do you call it when sodium and potassium surges the electron transport chain?

A deep nap

How did Skrillex get Potassium Hydroxide all over the floor?

He dropped the base.

Doctor: You appear to have potassium poisoning.

Mario: But I've avoided bananas my whole life!

Potassium and Oxygen hooked up

It would have been OK, if Potassium hadn't come first.

Bonus: Oxygen, Hydrogen, and Carbon always wear their best suits when they get together. They're a formyl group.

Want to hear a joke about potassium?

K.

I was gonna tell a joke about sodium but then I was like, Na.

What do you call a fruit that’s high in potassium and likes disorder?

A bananachist.

There is a new Mexican cheese on the market called potassium sulfur monoxide...

Or just K-SO, for short.

Hydrogen asks his parents, Sodium and Potassium if he can go to a party.

First, he asks his mom, Sodium. He knows that she is very strict and she will probably say no.

"Na," she says, exactly what he expects

He decides to ask his dad. He is much less strict, and was in a good mood. Maybe he can let Hydrogen go to the party.

"k," he says

To break the ice before a lab, we were told to tell our assigned groups the chemical element that represents us...

Sally said Helium because she's carefree and doesn't react to much. John said Potassium cause he loves to bring his energy into things and he's not keen on baths. Mary said Iron because she's malleable and likes to support everyone.
I said Uranium because I'm dense, unstable, and toxic.

Is the KKK a good source of Potassium?

Yes, because they're all bananas.

What did the man say when his boss asked him to deal with some potassium?

K.

An oxygen atom and a potassium atom were involved in a car accident

Fortunately, they came out OK

My favorite elements in the periodical chart are oxygen and potassium.

But most other people just find them O K.

An Oxygen molecule go sees a doctor

"Doc, Im suffering from terrible cramps" says the Oxygen Molecule.

"That's an easy fix," says the doctor, "Just eat some Potassium and you'll be OK!"

My chemistry teacher wrote me a heartfelt chemistry poem:

Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, Potassium, Yttrium, Oxygen, Uranium.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

She: I’m done with you and your fucking chemistry jokes..

Me: Potassium

What did the student say after learning all the symbols on the periodic table?

“Fluorine-Uranium-Carbon-Potassium this! Never again!”

What do scientists eat for breakfast?

Special Potassium

What club do racist scientists join?

The Potassium Potassium Potassium.

Gentlemen...BEHOLD! Puns.

What do you call a cool mushroom?...A fun guy!!!

A neutron walks into a bar. "I'd like a beer" he says. The bartender promptly serves up a beer. "How much will that be?" asks the neutron. "For you?" replies the bartender, "no charge"

A guy walks into a restaurant, and takes a seat. Acr...

Joke I came up with (needs work)

So there are this brother and sister who live together, Cee and Sofie. Sofie says she has a date tonight, the guy will be over at 8 and that Cee will have to let him in while she gets all pampered up.


So later that evening, there is a knock at the door and Sofie shouts out from upstairs ...

I always feel like I'm wasting a text message whenever I respond with just "K."

Now I write "Potassium" instead.

Friend 1 & Friend 2

Friend 1: did you know bananas have potassium

Friend 2: K

I tried to ask Google for some good chemistry jokes.

But it just kept returning "Fluorine Uranium Carbon Potassium Oxygen Fluorine Fluorine."

Silver walked up to elements in a bar that was on fire. Silver said "Get out!"

Gold said "Aukay"

Potassium said "K"

Sodium said "Na"

Argon didn't react.

Three atoms, hydrogen, helium, and oxygen walk into a bar.

They go up to the bartender, Germanium, and start to order their drinks, but soon realise they are short on cash.

Hydrogen says to Germanium, "Hey man, we've had a long week, bonding is hard. If we can make you laugh, can we drink for free tonight?"

Germanium thinks about it for a min...

Why did the chemist's girlfriend get mad at him?

He kept responding to her texts with "Potassium."

The way I see it, the March for Science has really turned out to be more of a parade for science puns than an actual protest.

And I'm totally Oxygen-Potassium with that.

A great chemistry

Once oxygen and potassium went on a date. It went OK.
Then oxygen went on with magnesium. They were OMg.
Then oxygen decided to ask out nitrogen, but NO

I wanted to tell you a great chemistry joke, but Na.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.