What did Gold say to the periodic table?

Hey you!

What is a pirate's favourite element on the periodic table?

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgon

Have you heard the joke about the periodic table?

It’s Oxygen Potassium.

Eminem is that guy in chemistry class that raps the whole periodic table.

But skips Oxygen.

What's a weeb's favorite element on the periodic table?

Manganese

Periodic table lesson

What did the scientist say when he found two helium atoms?


"He-He!"



(It's ok I know where the door is, bye)

My friend drew a giant periodic table and tripped on number 10

He's fine, but he could have hurt his Neon that

There was an election amongst the elements of the periodic table and Iron voted for Zinc...

... because Zinc was able to galvanize Iron.

The periodic table just got one block smaller

Scientists now say Plutonium is not a real element

Who wants to hear my joke about the periodic table?

Actually Na, people won't get it.

If you ever encounter an evil witch show them the periodic table

They're good at chemistry

What did the rest of the periodic table say as gold went home at the end of the day?

Au revoir!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is a pirate's favorite element in the periodic table?

Gold. Why the fuck would a pirate need Argon?

What did the student say after learning all the symbols on the periodic table?

“Fluorine-Uranium-Carbon-Potassium this! Never again!”

I auditioned for a musical about the periodic table

I got the lead role!

I just noticed the Periodic Table has been updated recently. Welcome #119- "AH"!

The element of surprise!

Which element of the Periodic Table is the poorest?

Antimony. ^I'm ^so ^sorry...

My friend asked me if she could use my periodic table

I said "sorry, I left it atom"

What's another name for the Periodic Table of elements?

The atoms family.

What element in the Periodic Table of Elements can you not take seriously?

Silly-con!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My boyfriend should be on the periodic table...

Because he's the densest motherfucker I've ever met.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apparently some people on Tumblr say they're sexually attracted to elements on the periodic table.

That's not really my thing ... except for that time in college when I experimented with carbon dating.

The rapper and the artifact

A very famous artifact recovered from an old monastery had been set for auction, with the promise that the money would go to an orphanage supported by the same monastery. This artifact was one of a kind, nobody knew exactly what it was but they knew that it was incredibly rare. Very few people knew ...

The chemistry department cafeteria has good food, but finding a place to sit can be a challenge.

They only have periodic tables.

Chuck Norris joke cause it's been a long time.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

How do you track the reproductive cycle of pachyderms?

With the Periodic Table of Elephants.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A student isn't paying attention in a Chemistry class.

The teacher notices this.

"JOSEPH!" She shouts.

Joseph, the student, snaps his head up, to look at the teacher.

"Have you even heard a WORD I've said?!" she yells.

Joseph nods.

"Oh REALLY?! Then, I hope you won't mind telling me and the rest of the class the 116th ...

Some (eye-rolling) Chemistry Pick-up Lines for the Valentine's season

* Are you made of Carbon? Because it feels like my world revolves around you.
* You're my Lithium.
* Are you an anion? Because I'm positive we're meant to be together.
* My heart is made of Gallium. It melts when you're close to me.
* Are you Fluorine? Because i can't seem to get myself ...

What is all this #Brexit going around?

When did Bromine decide to leave the periodic table?

Nerdy pickup line.

Hey baby, Are you uranium because I'm Iodine and if it was up to me I would rearrange the periodic table around and put U and I together. ;)

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