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Pics Jokes

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I was on PornHub the other day and there was an ad that read: 'free asian asshole pics'.

When I clicked on it it was just a picture of Xi Jinping.

I matched with a tinder profile that had no pics.

We chatted a bit. Smart and funny so i asked for a date. She said yes!

I'm not expecting much, probably 400lbs. But she answered the door, this little strawberry blomde with a head full of curls and all the right curves in all the right places. We exchanged our real names and i asked what sh...

Be careful today when searching "Giant Black Hole Pics"

All I keep getting are scientific articles.

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Sending dick pics is for amateurs...

Real men get out there and disappoint women in real life.

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I am doing a bra giveaway.

Send me pics of your boobs and I'll see if I have something that fits you.

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Your penis is so small..

That when you put it in a girl her immune system tries to fight it.

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Guys are now sending dirty pics against a background of the night sky with star trails.

They're calling it schlong exposure photography

What did the tulip farmer tell the social influencers who had trespassed to take pics?

I'm a grower not a shower.

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I never send dick pics.

I'm more of a "disappoint them in person" type of guy.

Elon Musk's DM to a hot girl: "Will send pics of my rocket. Lots of thrust. Gets up fast! Wink. Wink." Girl responds…

"Would be nice if it didn’t explode after 2 minutes."

So what if I sell feet pics on the side?

So shoe me

I installed a wind turbine in my yard if you want pics..

Subscribe to my onlyfans site

Hot Shower Pics

I was trying to take a picture of myself in the shower but I couldn't get a good one. The pictures kept coming out blurry.

I guess I have selfie steam issues.

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My girlfriend has a lot of dick pics on her old computer

She has a hard disk drive

Blonde is pulled over by a blonde cop..

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde. The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. 'What does it look like?' she fi...

Why couldn't Anakin Skywalker upload his pics to email them to Padme?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb?

How many redittors does it take to change a lightbulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers ...

Booty pics and golf are surprisingly similar, in that

A hole in one is both rare and satisfying.

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Why do guys ALWAYS send dick pics?

Because they think the camera adds ten pounds.

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Accidental dick pics can happen

I once accidentally sent a dick pic to everyone in my address book.

It was embarrassing and cost a fortune in stamps.

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One night, Wonder Woman sent some nude pics but one failed to impress...

...she didn't turn on the flash...

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What's another name for dick pics?

Junk mail!

I was once in a group project with a girl who did nothing but send feet pics

That was her sole contribution

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I met a very unnatractive girl recently and she likes to send pics

It goes without saying that I'm going to have to be the bearer of bad nudes.

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In honor of the current trend in r/pics: My wife refuses to send me nudes. She says she doesn't trust me with them.

Which is a shame because I know some guys who would pay serious $$$ for them.

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NSFW I was selling my dick pics online until people got angry.

Apparently people don't like microtransactions.

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Superman's flying around.... (comment from r/pics)

Superman's flying around metropolis and he's horny as hell. He's checking out the rooftops and all of a sudden he sees Wonder Woman sunning herself on the roof of the Justice League. I mean she is lying there buck naked and spread eagle. Looks like she wants to get fucked right? So Superman starts t...

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Some guy posted sexy pics of their girlfriend on r/memes

certified bra moment

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When I was young my mom grounded me for having a file on pc with the name "boobies pics"

I never understood why bird watching was wrong

Tried to snap pics of a ghost with my phone but they came out dark

The spirit was willing but the flash was weak

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I send *so* many dick pics

My urologist should not have given me his number.

A woman on Bumble tried to sell me pics of her toes but it didn't work out.

I guess I got off on the wrong foot.

Finally figured out why i look so bad in pics .

It's my face.

Girls hate it when I suddenly send them photographs of parasites

Turns out, no one wants unsolicited tick pics

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Uranus - These a re all true BTW

Uranus is full of gas.
Uranus smells like farts.
Uranus craps diamonds.
Uranus is a cold, cold place.
NASA flew by Uranus and snapped lots of pics.
Uranus is huge.
We can see Uranus with the naked eye.
Uranus is bleeding is an actual astrological (not astronomical...

What do dentists call x-rays?

Tooth Pics!

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A girl asked me for a dick pic.

I told her sorry, my phone doesn't take panoramic pics.

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The Nigerian king

Agnes, a middle-aged New York widow is feeling very lonely one day, so she decides to bite the bullet and try internet dating. Her initial attempts don't go very well, as most of the contact she receives varies from dick pics to guys asking for nudes. She's about to give up when one day she's contac...

Life hack…

To clearly see the blurry pics hot girls post of themselves, take three shots of tequila and Adderall.

How do ships flirt online?

They send deck pics.

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