An Irish Daughter...

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her father cursed her.
Where have ye been all this time? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff, sniff....dad.....

An Irishman walks into an American bar

He sits down and orders 3 beers.

“You know, you don’t have to order these all at once - I’m happy to make them fresh,” says the bartender.

“Oh no, ya see,” replies the Irishman, “the extras are for me two brothers back in Ireland. We all order 3 beers so it feels like we’re drinkin tog...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Simple Math (Read out loud for best effect)

Teacher: A guy plants 3 saplings and they all grow up. How many trees are there?

Student: Easy, 3.

Teacher: No, Tree plus Tree plus Tree equals 9.

Student: Wha-

Teacher: Now a truck drives by and splats mud on all the trees. How many trees now?

Student: 9?

T...

An English man and an Irish man are driving head-on, at night, on a twisty, dark road. Both are driving too fast

for the conditions and collide on a sharp bend in the road. To the amazement of both, they are unscathed, though their cars are both destroyed. In celebration of their luck, both agree to put aside their dislike for the other from that moment on. At this point, the Englishman goes to the boot and fe...

Shortly after a British Airlines flight had reached its cruising altitude, the captain announced: "Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain. Welcome to Flight 293, non-stop from London Heathrow to New York. The weather ahead is good, so we should have an uneventful flight. So, sit back, relax, and

“OH MY GOD!”

Silence followed..... complete silence...

Some moments later, the captain came back on the intercom.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm sorry if I scared you. While I was talking to you, a flight attendant accidentally spilled hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Irishman goes to the doctor's surgery ...

and he says to the doctor "Top o' the morning Doc, I've got a little problem. It's a pain like, in me arse."

So the doctor says "Well we'd better have a look at it. Take your trousers and pants down."

After the patient assumes the position the doctor gets a rubber glove, some lubricant...

An Irish Man Walks Into A Bar...

...and stumbles to the bartender. “Barkeep, Oi’ll have a point”, he slurs.

The bartender looks him over critically. “A pint? Sorry sir, but I can’t serve you. You’re clearly too drunk.”

The Irish man scrunches his eyebrows, peers at the barkeep, turns around and trips out the front doo...

Did you hear about the Irishman who was impervious to bullets?

His name was Rick O'Shea

An American walks into an Irish bar.

While on vacation, an American walks into an Irish pub and orders a drink. After a minute he says out loud, "I'll bet anyone in here $1,000 if they can take 10 shots of Jameson in a row, without stopping or vomiting." The bar gets quiet except for one man who gets up and walks out. The American laug...

What's more Irish than potatoes?

No potatoes.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A poor Irish family...

A poor Irish family lives on a farm and they rely on their single cow for income.

One morning, the father walks outside to find their cow dead.

"There is nothing that could help get us out of poverty now," says the dad as he shoots himself.

The mom walks outside and sees the dad...

An Irishman and an Englishman find a lamp

Upon rubbing it a genie pops out and says For freeing me, I will grant you each one wish!"
The Englishman says "I love my country, but it's being ruined by foreigners. I wish a wall to be built around it so that no one else can get in."
The genie says, "Done. And you, Irishman?"
The Irishm...

An Englishman, Irishman, Welshman, Scotsman were captured while fighting in a far-off foreign land,

and the leader of the captors said, "We're going to line you up in front of a firing squad and shoot you all in turn. But first, you each can make a final wish."

The Englishman responds, "I'd like to hear "God Save The Queen" just one more time to remind me of the auld country, played by the ...

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral?

One less drinker

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar

When the Englishman wanted to leave everybody had to

A man walks up to the store clerk and asks "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?"

The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"

The guy (clearly offended) says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?

Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?

Or...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Two irishmen, lost at sea...

Two irishmen are floating on a boat, lost at sea. They ran out of food a couple of days ago, and ran out of water just today, so naturally they're pretty desperate.

Out on the water, one of them spies a genie's lamp, and they both frantically paddle towards it.

One of them pull out the...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Englishman, a Scottish man, and an Irish man all walk into a pub with their wives.

They all sit down and order a cup of tea. The Englishman looks to his wife and says “could you pass the honey, honey?” The Scottish man thinks to himself how clever that was, then turns to his wife and says “could you pass the sugar, sugar?” The Irish man - not wanting to be out witted by the other ...

What do you call a bulletproof Irishman?

Rick O’Shea

Fire at the Pub

A firehouse got a call about a pub. The firemen rushed there to see the place ablaze. They could hear someone calling for help from inside. Two of them ran in to see an Irishman trapped under debris. They were able to pull him out as the rest of them fought the fire. One of his rescuers asked how th...

I like my women how I like my whiskey

Strong, Irish, and at least 18 years old.

An American, an Irish man an a German walk into a bar.

The American orders a Bud Light. The Irish man orders a Guinness. The German orders a Coke. "Why don't you drink a beer?" the American asks the German. The German answers: "If you don't drink beer I won't either."

What’s Irish and stays out all night?

Patty O’Furniture

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish man...

None

An Irish girl tells her mom she decided to be a prostitute.

her mom says "A WHAT"?!! The daughter says "a prostitute" then the mom says "thank god... I thought you said a Protestant"

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Mormon and An Irish Man Get on a Plane

The Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight from London to the US.


After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for a whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him.


The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a...

What's more Irish than potatoes?

Not having potatoes


_(Dont know who came up with this joke but I love it)_

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and and Irishman all enter a pub, sit down at the bar, and each orders a pint.

By some incredible coincidence, three flies come along and each one lands in a separate glass.

The Englishman pushes his glass away in disgust and demands that it be replaced on the house.

The Scotsman scoops the fly out of his beer, drops it on the bar top, and continues to sip.
...

What's the difference between St Patrick's day and Martin Luther King day?

Everyone wants to be Irish on St Patrick's day..

Why do the Irish only put 239 beans in their soup?

Because one more bean would be too farty.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An English man, Scottish man and Irish man having a conversation about their daughters.

English man: I went in my daughter's bedroom today, when she was out and there are empty bottles of beer everywhere, under her bed, in her bed, and all over the floor. I didn't even know she drank beer...


Well said the Scottish man in my daughter's bed room I found empty cigarette pac...

What did the Irish farmer name his potato plot?

Carb O'hydrate

An Irish priest was driving one night

when he gets pulled over by a police officer. Smelling alcohol, the officer walks up to the priest and asks, "have you been drinking tonight?" Holding a bottle of wine the priest answers, "no officer, just water." "So what's that in your hand", asks the officer. "Good Lord, he's done it again!" , ex...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man asks him, "What's wrong?"

The boy says, "Me ma is dead."

"Oh bejaysus," the man replies. "Do you want me to call Father O'Riley for you?"

The boys says, "No tanks mister. Sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment."

What do you call an Irish millionaire?

A ginger bread man.

What do you call an Irish dwarf whose limbs keep falling off?

A Leper-chaun.

Why are Irish people so rich?

Their capital is always Dublin

Have you heard the Irish joke about R. Kelly?

It won’t take much time; it’s only a wee joke.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

HITLER WAS IRISH!!

When Hitler lived in Ireland he went by the name of Spud Murphy
He changed his name when he emigrated to Germany, calling himself Dick Tater

What do you call an Irishman who makes outdoor tables and chairs?

Patty O’furniture.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Crying Irish Woman In Church

And the Priest says, "Mary, why are ye cryin'?"

Mary: "ah jesus Father me husband died last night!"

Priest: "Oh God Bless us and all Harm, did he have any last requests?"

Mary: "aye....MARY PUT THE FUCKIN GUN DOWN!"

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Irishman applied for a job working with the local blacksmith.

“Have you ever shoed horses before?” the blacksmith asked him.

“No,” replied the Irishman, “but I did tell a donkey to fuck off once.”

An Irish man walked out of a bar...

Theoretically, it could happen...

What's an Irish swimmer's favourite stroke?

Margaret Thatcher's.

The sale of Irish cars during the troubles

Was booming

Why do the Irish and those of Irish descent never get offended by Irish jokes?

Because they are all true!

What is a Irish nationalists favourite cartoon?

Fenians & Ferb

Irishman Murphy applied for a fermen-tation operator post at a famous Irish firm based in Dublin.

A Pole applied for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications, they were asked to take a test by the Manager. When the results were in, both men had scored 19 out of 20.

The manager went to Murphy and said, "Thank you for coming to the interview, but we've decided to gi...

What's the most stereotypical Irish name?

Klee Shea

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An irish sailor with the steering wheel of a ship jammed into his crotch walks into a bar

He walks into the bar

The bartender approaches him worried and says to the sailor " What the fuck man is that a steering wheel?"

To wich the sailor replies "Aye lad, it's drivin me nuts"

A Genie Grants an Irish Man Three Wishes.

The Genie inquires what his first wish will be.

​

"A bottle of Jameson!" the man declares.

​

The Genie snaps his fingers and a bottle of Jameson appears. The man quickly opens it and drinks the entire bottle of liquor. "What would you like for your...

Shortly after take-off on an outbound, evening Air Lingus flight from Dublin to Boston, the lead flight attendant nervously made the following announcement in her lovely Irish brogue:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I'm so very sorry, but it appears that there has been a terrible mix-up by our catering service.

We have 103 passengers on board, and unfortunately, we received only 40 dinner meals. I truly apologize for this and anyone who is kind enough to give up their meal so th...

A British ship is on a collision course and this is the following transcription with an Irish:

Irish: We need you to divert your course 15 degrees to the west to avoid collision.

British: No, you need to move your ship 15 degrees to the west to avoid collision. We’re not moving.

Irish: Negative. We’re gonna need you to divert your course to avoid a collision. Now!

British...

An irish dwarf and a doctor walk into a bar

An irish dwarf and a doctor walk into a bar, its about 5 in the afternoon but they start putting down drinks like no other. The dwarf not wanting to risk it and drive home decides to call his wife for a ride. He tells her "i was just with a doctor, and I'm a wee bit smashed" and she tells him "Reall...

Al the Irish jokes I've heard - Irish this sub a happy St. Patrick's Day!:

* What do you get when you cross a 4 leaf clover with poison ivy? A rash of good luck.
* What do you call a fake Irish stone? A shamrock.
* Why shouldn't you iron a 4-leaf clover? You'd be pressing your luck.
* What instrument did the diva musician play on St. Patrick's day? Brag-pipes....

What's sick, Irish, and hates Captain Kirk?

A leper Khan.

Irish Dancing Manual

Lost for centuries, volume 2 of the Irish Dancing Manual has finally been rediscovered.

It’s titled “How to Move The Arms”

​

Yesterday was my Irish Uncle second anniversary being sober.

Yeah he's been in a coma for 2 years.

Irish-man and Scot-man walk into a pub...

As they walk through the front door, the Scot walks in first. "A round of drinks for the whole house. I'm buying".

The next day, the lead article in the local paper read: "Irish ventriloquist found beaten to death behind local pub".

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Irish fireman (slightly racist)

Paddy was at a fire one day but he had forgot his ladder. He managed to persuade the first person, a middle aged white woman that he would catch her, and he did. Then her mother followed, again paddy caught her. Next a black man jumped out and fell straight to the pavement.

Paddy shouted up "...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Hey girl, are you Irish?

Because my penis is Dublin.

What do you call an Irish fella trying to break up a fight?

Liam Malone

An Englishman, a Scottish man and an Irish man walk into a bar.

They all had to leave because the English man voted to.

The only thing more Irish than a potato is...

The lack of even a single one.

PS: No offense.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A very drunk Irish man runs out of money for beer while in a pub...

In desperate need of another drink he says to the bartender "Please, I am out of money but I will do anything for another beer"

The bartender thinks about it for a minute and says "well mate I got a dog in the backroom with an awful toothache, I don't have the heart to pull it out myself but...

If Tarzan and Jane were Irish what would that make Cheetah?

The designated driver....

An Irish bride is interviewed by police after a fight broke out at her wedding reception.

*“Well officer, it’s customary for the bride to dance with the best man before the bride and groom leave for their honeymoon. I was dancing with the best man Paddy when all of a sudden me husband Seamus came running on the dance floor and kicked me as hard as he could smack bang between my legs.”*...

An English Man, An Irish Man and a Scotchman are caught by cannibals.

The cannibals tell them they will all be skinned alive and turned into canoes and all. Of their insides eaten however, they have one last request before this happens.

The English man says "For my last request I want to have a cigar" the cannibals provide him with this and as soon as its fini...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Skinny irish man and a black guy in an elevator

Skinny little Irish man goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE black guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little Irish man staring at him, he looks down and says: '7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pounds of testicles, Turner Brown.'

The little white Irish man fa...

An Irish person wants to find something in the dark

He takes his pack of matches, lights them up one by one, looking for something on the floor.

His friend walks in and asks “what are you looking for?”

The Irish person responds “I think I dropped a match”.

What do you call an Irish Donut Knot?

idk

Paddy was sitting in his local pub when a fine looking Italian woman walks in.

He offered her a drink and over the course of the night he charmed her with funny Irish stories and songs. She’d never had a night like it before and decided to invite him back to her room.

They had a passionate affair all that summer.
One night, she confided in him that she was pregnant....

Irish bar joke

An Irishman leaves the bar

An English man, a Scottish man, and an Irish man find a magic slide!

They have to slide down the slide and scream what they wish for, and it will come true. So the English man slides down and screams money, so he is rewarded with a massive pile of money. The Scottish man slides down and yells a massive house, so he is rewarded with a massive house! The Irishman slide...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

2 Irish strangers sitting at the bar....

After a beer one Irish man points out the window to the other and says, "you see that bridge laddy? I BUILT that BRIDGE with me bare hands! But do they call me McGregor the BRIDGE BUILDER? No..

​

After 2 beers the Irish man points out the window again and says, "you see that...

If Mick Jagger was Irish

would he go by McJagger?

An Englishman, a Scottish man and an Irish man were captured by a serial killer.

The serial killer said “I will kill you all, but as a final act of kindness I will let you each decide how I will kill you.”

The Englishman accepting his impending death said “I want to die by suffocation, but please make it quick.” So the serial killer picked up a pillow, smothered the face ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A London lawyer is driving

A London lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by an Irish cop. He thinks that he is smarter than the cop because he is a lawyer from LONDON and is certain that he has a better education than any Irish cop. He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the Irish cop's expense.
<...

Two Irishmen have a bright idea...

Paddy and Murphy are working on a building site. Paddy says to Murphy,

"I'm gonna get the day off. I'm gonna pretend I've gone mad!" He climbs up the rafters, hangs upside down and shouts "I'm a lightbulb, I'm a lightbulb!"

Murphy watches in amazement.

The foreman shouts: "Pad...

What do you name an Irish baby that bounces when you throw it at a wall?

Rick O’Shea

The Irish Priest

An Irish priest was transferred to Texas.

Father O'Malley rose from his bed one morning. It was a fine spring
day in his new west Texas mission parish. He walked to the window of
his bedroom to get a deep breath of the beautiful day outside.

He then noticed there was a jack...

Time to confess.

A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest, "I almost had an affair with another woman." The priest said, "What do you mean, almost?" The Irishman said, "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped."

The priest said, "Rubbing together is the same ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A black man, an Irish guy, a Jew and a Greek guy die and go to heaven.

When they get to heaven, St. Peter says “All of you will go through a test of temptation, if you pass the test, you can come back to life”. The four men agree and begin their test.

It involves them walking down a street with multiple forms of temptation on the sides.

As they’re walki...

An Irish Setter, a Dalmatian, and a Beagle were talking

The Irish Setter says to the Beagle: "I am excited for the party next weekend."
The Dalmatian says: "Me too."
The Beagle says to the Setter and the Dalmatian: "You guys weren't invited."
The Irish Setter and the Dalmatian both say: "What? Why not?"
The Beagle says: "Probably because you ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Paddy drinking at the Irish pub

Patrick staggered home very late after another evening with his drinking buddy, Paddy.   He took off his shoes to avoid waking his wife, Kathleen.
He tiptoed as quietly as he could toward the stairs leading to their upstairs bedroom, but misjudged the bottom step.   As he caught himself by grab...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Father Pat, a Catholic Priest in a small Irish town call everyone together.

He starts the service very bluntly

Pat: "Alright you all know why you're here. We need to talk about all these stories about... ghosts."

Pat: "So how many of you hear have heard the stories about ghosts?" - Everyone raised there hand.

Pat: "Alright, now how many of you believe i...

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman were standing looking at a prize cow in a field.

The Englishman says “Look at that fine English cow.” The Irishman disagreed, saying “No, it’s an Irish cow.”
The Scotsman thought for a moment and then clinched the argument. “No, it’s a Scottish cow – it’s got bagpipes underneath”.

Ireland puns

what do irish people call split personallity disorder?

doublin

what do irish people call mytosis?

a doublin cell?

what do irish people call twins?

sean and connor

Three Irish brothers

Three Irish brothers go to the pub every Friday for a pint of Guinness after work. One day one of the brothers informs the other two that he’s been offered a new job in England and it’s too good to pass up. They’re upset but understand and wish him well so long as he goes to the pub every Friday and...

An Irish man frees a genie

and happy to be released from his confinement, the genie grants him 3 wishes.

The Irishman thinks about it, and says "I want me a pint of Guinness that is never empty."

So *poof* a pint appears, filled to the rim with the rich brown drink. The man drinks it down, and when he places it...

What’s Irish and left outside all winter?

Patty’O Furniture

What do you call an Irish man that smokes weed?

A baked potato.

Two Irishmen were walking down a street in London.

Paddy turns to Murphy with a look of amazement on his face and says: "Murphy, will you look at that shop over there. I thought that London was supposed to be expensive!"

Murphy says: "Paddy you're right so you are. Suits £10, Shirts £4, Trousers £5, I think that we should buy the lot and take...

TIL that the "o" in Irish names denote that you're a grandson

My great-great-great-great grandfather was Reilly, Vehiclepiece. I'm O'O'O'Reilly, Autoparts

What's Irish and stays outside your house all year no matter the weather?

Paddy O'Furniture.

An Englishman, Scotsman and Irishman are working on a building site...

High above the city, they sit together, eating their lunch as they do every lunchtime.
The Englishman, Arthur, opens his lunchbox and picks out his sandwiches.

"I say! roast beef sandwiches. I'm sick of roast beef sandwiches! If I've got roast beef sandwiches tomorrow, I shall throw myse...

A Guy walks in an Irish Pub

A guy on vacation in Ireland walks into a pub and says
"I hear you Irish can drink, I'll give a thousand bucks
to the guy who can drink 10 pints of Guinness in under 5 minutes"
Everyone is quiet but one of the Irishmen gets up and leaves.
In a few minutes the Irishmen walks back ...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

An Irish man walks into a pub.

The bartender asks him, "What'll you have?"

The man says, "Give me three pints of Guinness please."

So the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He then orders three more.

The bartender sa...

An Irishman was drinking in a bar in London when he gets a call on his cell phone.

He orders drinks for everybody in the bar as he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Irish baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the man just shrugs, "That's about average up our way, folks...like I said - my boy's a typical Irish...

A Texan visits Galway.

A Texan walks into a pub in Galway, Ireland and raises his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He shouts, "I hear you Irish are a bunch of drinkin' fools. I'll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back to back."


The room is quiet and no one takes of...

Irish Wedding

A wedding occurred just outside Cavan in Ireland. To keep tradition going, everyone got extremely drunk and the bride's and groom's families have a storming row and begin wrecking the reception room and generally kicking
the living daylights out of each other. The Police get called in to bre...

Irish Toast

John O’ Reilly was at the local pub ...
He hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife !"

That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!

He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the best...

An Irish man knocks on an old lady’s door.

He asks her, is there any work I can do for you?

She says yeah can you paint the porch

He agrees and she gets him some paint.

Some time later he comes back and says, “I’m finished, but It’s not a porch it’s a BMW

Irish Joke #76331

Why does an Irishman wear three condoms?


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To be sure, to be sure, to be sure!

There was an English man, a Scottish man and an Irish man

They all went to a magical slide in which you would land in whatever you shouted while riding. The English man shouted

"Gold!" he landed in gold , took it and went home happily.

The Scottish man shouted

"Silver!" he landed in silver, took it and went home happily.

The Ir...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A young Irish man called Paddy wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new girlfriend.

A young Irish man called Paddy wanted to buy a Christmas present for his new girlfriend. They hadn't been seeing each other for very long and she lived in Donegal and he lived in Kerry . Paddy consulted with his sister and decided, after careful consideration, that a pair of good quality gloves woul...

Two Irish guys are looking at the want ads for jobs

They see an ad for tree fellers wanted.

One turns to the other and says

"Damn if there were only one more of us"

What do you call a big Irish spider?

A paddy long legs.

Two Irish guys, Paddy and Mick are drunk in a newly renovated pub in their town

Paddy announces that he has to go to the bathroom.

"I'llll assk the baarman where the bog isss" Paddy mumbles to his mate and then he stumbles up to the bar.

"Wherrre'ss the jack's?" He asks the barman.

Pointing to a door in the back, the barman says "Go through that door, take...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

A Dublin thug corners an Irishman in a dark alley... [Religion] [Irish]

The thug raises a club and says "Got ya! I'm gonna split yer skull, ya Protty bastard!"

"No, wait!" says the man "You've got it wrong. I'm not a Protestant."

"Ah-ha!" Shouts the thug, "I tricked ya! I knew ya were a damn Croppy all along! Now die, ya papist!"

"No, you don't unde...

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

The Irish Square testicals

An elderly woman walked into the Royal Bank of Ireland one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.


After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is alwa...

What do you call a someone who is a mix heritage between and Asian and and Irish?

rice paddy

Irish animal rights activists have broken into a turkey farm.

They say they are going to release thousands of turkeys into the wild...

as soon as they’ve defrosted

Scotsman, Englishman, and an Irishman walk into a bar

Sitting in a bar the Scotsman says, "As good as this bar is, I still prefer the pubs back home. In Glasgow, there's a wee place. The landlord goes out of his way for the locals. When you buy four drinks, he'll buy the fifth drink."

"Well," said the Englishman, "At my local in London , th...

Have you heard about the Irish boomerang?

When you throw it it doesn't come back, it just sings songs about how it wishes it could.