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A Bulgarian spy is caught by the Russian KGB.

They ask him what were the procedures of the Bulgarian agency. They torture him for two weeks but he tells them nothing. On a spy exchange he returns home and his comrades ask him what happened. He said "You'd better start learning the procedures or they'll beat the shit out of you!"

The Bulgarian Train Conductor

Most kids want to become a firefighter or astronaut when they’re older. This man, however, really wanted to become a train conductor. Unfortunately, he gets the job and he loves it. But one particular day, he’s enjoying his job a little too much. He’s driving too fast and accidentally derails the tr...

A Bulgarian, French and US soldier died and went to hell.

The devil was in a good mood so he offered them a deal:
> I have two simple task for you. If you pass them I will let you go to heaven, if not - eternal damnation.

Having no other option, the soldiers agreed.
> For the first task go away and bring back the weapon you defended yo...

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A waitress walks up to one of her tables in a New York City restaurant and notices that the three Bulgarian businessmen seated there are furiously masturbating. She says, "What the hell do you guys think you are doing!?"

One of the Bulgarian men says, "Can't you see? Ve arrrre all verrry, verrry hoongry."

The waitress makes a stroking motion and says, "So how is whacking-off in the middle of the restaurant going to help that situation??"

One of the other businessmen replies, "The menu say, FIRST COME, ...

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So how about a real joke about Bulgarians for a change?

A flying saucer beams up a German engineer, an Indian guru and a Bulgarian. The three of them are informed by an alien in a lab coat that standard procedure when contacting an unfamiliar species is to subject them to the standardized intergalactic intelligence test.

"You will be put in an air...

A Bulgarian goes to the doctor

A Bulgarian goes to the doctor for a checkup. He enters the room, hangs his coat and sits infront of the doctor.

-When was the last time you had an examination made by a doctor? -asked the doctor.

-I don't know. Maybe 20 years ago.

-Do you drink?

-Yes. I drink beer for ki...

There was a Bulgarian man who drove trains for a living.

He loved his job. Driving a train had been his dream ever since he was a child. He loved to make the train go as fast as possible. Unfortunately, one day he was a little too reckless and caused a crash. He made it out, but a single person died. Well, needless to say, he went to court over this incid...

An Elbonian, Brazilian, Bulgarian and Liberian are in a swearing contest.

The Elbonian swears for 1 minute

The Brazilian swears for 3 minutes and everyone claps.

The Liberian swears for 5 minutes and gets a standing ovation.

On the way to the stage, the Bulgarian trips on the stairs. He swears for 20 minutes, cursing the designer of the steps. Then he...

Since we're on Bulgarian jokes - here's one about bananas:

There was this guy sitting on a bench in the park and opposite him there sat an old man with a bag of bananas. He takes one banana out, he peels the banana, he seasons it with salt, and he throws it away.

The guy wonders: "Why is this old man taking one banana out of his bag, peels the banan...

What do you call it when a Bulgarian uses vulgar language?

A Bulgarity.

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an Andorran, an Angolan, an Antiguans, an Argentine, an Armenian....

an Australian, an Austrian, an Azerbaijani, a Bahamian, a Bahraini, a Bangladeshi, a Barbadian, a Barbudans, a Batswanan, a Belarusian, a Belgian, a Belizean, a Beninese, a Bhutanese, a Bolivian, a Bosnian, a Brazilian, a Brit, a Bruneian, a Bulgarian, a Burkinabe, a Burmese, a Burundian, a Cambodia...

A Frenchman, an Italian and a Bulgarian were on a trans-continental flight over Europe.

"Aha!" exclaims the Frenchman. "We're over my homeland of France right now!" The other two asked him how he knows - "If you do some simple math it's easy to figure out."

A while passes "Aha!" exclaims Italian "NOW we're approaching my hometown." When asked how he knows he says "I know those m...

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A very clean joke

A Portuguese, Spaniard, Dane, Finn, Swede, German, French, Italian, Belgian, Austrian, Czech, Polish, Russian, Afgani, Serbian, Brit, Irish, Scot, Sardinian, Corsican, Icelander, Belarian, Romanian, Yugoslavian, Hungarian, Ukrainian, Bulgarian, Turk, Morrocan, Algerian, Liberian, Sudanese, S. Africa...

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A boat was shipwrecked in the South Pacific, as a result...

A group of people from different nationalities found themselves stranded on a remote and beautiful island. The party consisted of:

-Two Italian men and one Italian woman

-Two French men and one French woman

-Two German men and one German woman

-Two Greek men and one Greek...

A rather drunk lieutenant formed up the platoon:

"Soldiers, why is the formation so crooked?"
"Because the Earth is round!" - someone called out.
"Who said that?"
"Galileo."
"Galileo, step forward!"
"But he has died long ago!"
"So then?! People here are dying, and no one is reporting this to me?"
...

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Politically Correct Nightclub

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Ghurkha, a Lativan, a Turk, an Aussie, two Kiwis, a German, an America, a South African, a Cypriot, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Swede, a Finn, an Isreali, a Dane, a Romanian, a Bulgarian, a S...

Satan Visits Three Men on a Boat

Note: This works with any race or ethnic background, but I will tell it as I first heard it.



There are three men on a boat. A Macedonian, a Bulgarian, and an Albanian. Mr. Satan shows up and tells them that he will kill them if they can't throw something he can't find into the ocean....

A Buddhist monk turns to the Dalai Lama for an answer.

A Buddhist monk was pondering what is the difference between a woman and a pearl, but couldn't figure it out. He gave up and decided to ask the Dalai Lama.

"Hmm, interensting question, young grasshopper - said the Dalai Lama. I do not know, but if you give me three days to meditate on this, ...

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Two Men And A Woman From Different Countries Get Stranded...

On a group of beautiful deserted islands in the middle of nowhere, the following people are suddenly stranded by, as you might expect, a shipwreck:

• 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman

• 2 French men and 1 French woman

• 2 German men and 1 German woman

• 2 Greek men and 1 ...

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Fox goes to Amsterdam

(This was told to me by a Bulgarian guy...)

So the fox has just come back from a weekend break in Amsterdam, and managed to sneak some high-grade weed back with her. It's a beautiful sunny day, so she decides to relax at a nearby lake and smoke a joint.

She's just sparked up when a fro...

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