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Go Over Jokes

Little Jimmy and Suzy are in class when their teacher begins to go over grammar and sentences.

The teacher looks at Suzy first and says
"Suzy can you use the word stupid in a sentence?
"Yes I can. Jimmy is very stupid."
"Great!" said the teacher. "Now can you use ugly in a sentence?"
"Jimmy is very ugly."
The teacher turns to Jimmy and says "Can you upstage her, Jimmy? Try us...

If you go over to someone’s house and they have a banner of the former Soviet Union hanging on their wall

That’s a huge red flag.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man, a woman, and a dog are all about to go over the edge of a canyon in a car.

The man and woman get into a heated argument about bad driving, and whose fault this is.
The argument is cut short by the car's horn beeping repeatedly while the dog barks excessively. Glaring at the woman, the man bitterly complains, "Well it doesn't fucking matter, we're about to die anyway. Bu...
AI Image Generator

There’s a guy with a Doberman Pincher and a guy with a Chihuahua. The guy with the Doberman Pincher says to the guy with the Chihuahua, "Let’s go over to that restaurant and get something to eat." The guy with the Chihuahua says, "We can’t go in there. We’ve got dogs with us."

The guy with the Doberman Pincher says, "Just follow my lead."
They walk over to the restaurant. The guy with the Doberman Pincher puts on a pair of dark glasses and he starts to walk in. A guy at the door says, "Sorry man, no pets allowed."
The guy with the Doberman Pincher says, "You don’t u...

I like it when jokes go over my head

Because I really don't like getting hit in the face

I like to tell Dad jokes

But he never finds them funny.

So I went to a birthday party and told dad jokes. It didn’t go over too well, I was asked to leave the orphanage.

My wife asked me to stop with the corny dad jokes. I was doing to do one about chemistry, but now I’m afraid of the reaction.

I was going to write a joke about your lack of stature...

...but it would probably just go over your head.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Shai is excited for his trip to Mexico because he is an avid SCUBA diver.

When he goes, he finds a company that can take him to the reefs and links up with a dive leader. While on the boat preparing their tanks, the leader begins talking him about the different types of animals that they will see. Since the both of them will not be able to communicate verbally, the dive l...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman came crying to her husband and said,

“I was sitting on that park bench when that man over there walked up to me and said he wanted to fill my pussy with ice cream and eat it all up.”

Her husband says, “ok?”

Wife: Well aren’t you going to do something? Aren’t you going to go over there and teach him a lesson?

Husba...

It’s not what it looks like…

At the final days of WW2 French troops are facing a German trench in 50 meters distance and can only see a single remaining German soldier hanging around there and smoking a cigarette. So with a megaphone they demand that he surrenders. In return they hear the guy shouting “One German soldier is sti...

Adam

One day, God summoned Adam for an important task he must complete...

God Said, "Adam, I want you to do something for me."

Adam said, "Gladly Lord, what do you want me to do?"

God said, "Go down into that valley."

Adam said, "What's a valley?"

God explaine...

I went to a birthday party and told dad jokes

The jokes didn't go over well. I was asked to leave the orphanage.

I could tell u a roof joke

But it probably just go over ur head

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A nun was chatting with Mother Superior.

"I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it."



"When did you use this awful language?" asks the elder nun.



"Well, I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 280 yards, but it struck a phone line t...

A Blonde calls her boyfriend and says,

"Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her boyfriend decides to go ...

Sahara Desert.

A somewhat predictable oldie but amusing nevertheless.

A guy was lost in the Sahara Desert, desperate for water, when he saw something far off in the distance. Hoping to find water, he walked towards the image only to find a little old man sitting at a card table with a bunch of neckties la...

A man was having a few in the local bar

when he noticed a sailor sitting at the other end of the bar. The sailor had a completely normal physique except for one anomaly: his head was tiny, about the size of an orange.

The man stared at the sailor in puzzlement, and after a few more drinks screwed up his courage to go over and ask t...

An astronaut flies in his space shuttle

And after flying for a while he stops at the nearest gas station in space to fill up. Once he’s done he asks the cashier where the nearest bar is. The cashier respond with “if you just go over to the next moon, you’ll find it. It’s called The Keyboard.” The astronaut thanks the cashier and leaves. O...

Bad boy and good girl (long)

So a guy decides he wants to date this girl. He finds out that she's quite prudish but he's willing to look past that because she's really, really pretty. After constantly asking her, she finally agrees to go out with him. One date leads to another and soon they have a steady thing going. He wants ...

A large group of Russian invaders on the outskirts of Kharkiv are moving along the road, when suddenly from behind a small hill they hear a voice shout:

A large group of Russian invaders on the outskirts of Kharkiv are moving along the road, when suddenly from behind a small hill they hear a voice shout:

"One Ukrainian soldier is better than 10 Russians!"

The Russian commander orders a halt and his 10 best soldiers to go over the hill...

A tall golf tale. It's a long one....

On Bryan's 35th birthday, his wife gave him a set of new golf clubs. He was excited to try them out, so he drove down to the country club to play. He noticed a man there, in his 60s, who also didn't have anyone to play with and asked him if he would like to join him. The older man agreed and told hi...

Three builders are up on the scaffold one day [long]

They are discussing their lunches. The first builder says ''You know lads, I've been getting the same bloody ham sandwich, every day, for the last 10 years. If my wife makes me ONE MORE ham sandwich tomorrow, I'll jump right off this scaffold and end it all.''

The second builder says ''ha, t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy takes up a new job.

On Monday he calls in and says, ‘I can’t come in today, I’m sick.’ He works the rest of the week, but the following Monday he calls in and says, ‘I can’t come in today, I’m sick.’

The boss asks the foreman about him and he replies, ‘He’s great. He does the work of two men. We need him.’
...

Three lawyers and three engineers are travelling by train to a conference.

The three lawyers buy a ticket each while the engineers by only one. The lawyers laugh at the engineers crying how can three people travel by train using only one ticket. The engineers respond with “you’ll see”.



They all board the train and the lawyers take a seat while the engineers ...

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