UPJOKE
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My daughter just got a boyfriend who’s from Hong Kong, but I keep forgetting his name…

He’s just Sum Yung Gai.

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A woman was on the way to winning $100,000 on a game show, but her final question was suspended for the next night.

Her husband sneaked into the studio and found the question and answer. He raced home and told his wife "Your question is 'What are the three main parts of the male anatomy', and the answer is 'The head, heart and penis.'

The woman thinks about this throughout the night, but keeps forgettin...

The cost of forgetting fresh, hot tea...

...is steep.

I keep forgetting what the opposite of night is called.

I gave up and just called it a day.

I told my doctor, “I think I have ADHD because I keep forgetting where I parked my Ford.”

Doctor: That’s not how ADHD works.

Me: But I keep losing my Focus.

I’ll never forget the time I had to do PE in my underwear after forgetting my shorts.

It ended my teaching career there and then.

What do you say when you can speak two languages, but keep forgetting vocabulary in both:

I am BYElingual

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Three sailors are discussing their cargo

They are used to transporting goods and make a good living doing so, this time however they've been tasked with taking 300 boxes of penis shaped potatoes across the channel and they all think it's a joke.

"We'll be a laughing stock" says the first sailor.

"I'll never be able to live it...

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Bob's wife was very mad at him for forgetting their anniversary...

At this point, she had enough of Bob's shit. "When I wake up tomorrow, I expect to see something shiny and silver that can go from 0-300 in under 4 seconds!" said the wife.



When she awoke the next morning, to her surprise she noticed a box with a bow in the garage. When she opened it ...

Brain reduction

A man went to a doctor, and said he wanted to be able to get a job at the local Post Office, but unfortunately he was too smart.

The doctor asked him his IQ, and when he gave a three-digit reply, the doctor told him that the procedure would have to involve the removal of over half of his bra...

A theater actor kept forgetting his lines, so he painted the script on the stage.

It was a play on words.

I keep on forgetting what the Roman numerals are for 1, 1000, 51, 6, & 500 are.

I M LIVID

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Are pirates ass men or tit men

Ass men. It’s all about the quality of the booty, not the size of the chest.

Came up with this a few months ago and keep forgetting to post it.

I tried to sing “Danger Zone” five times at karaoke night, but kept forgetting the lyrics.

They eventually kicked me off stage.
Too many Loggins attempts.

I've been forgetting things

for as long as I can remember.

An Old Couple has Memory Problems

They both continually struggle with short term memory issues, forgetting their keys, glasses and everything else you could possibly imagine!

One day they went to the doctors to ask him what they could do. He told them that one of the best things they can do is write everything down. Not only ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Everybody is saying Harvey Weinstein is the worst person in history, but I think they're forgetting that Hitler is the worst person in history

I mean if he finished what he started, we wouldn't have to deal with Weinstein

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Two old timers were at the old folks home

Sean turned to Paddy and asked him: if you had to choose between having Parkinson’s or Alzheimer’s, which one would you chose?

Aww for Fuck’s sake, said Paddy. I’d rather spill half a glass of whiskey, than forgetting where I put the fucken bottle.

Forgetting your backpack while going to school is bad

But forgetting it while going skydiving is worse

I keep forgetting what "Armageddon" means.

Oh well. It's not the end of the world.

Forgetting to check your pockets for money before washing clothes could land you in some trouble.

Laundering money is illegal.

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