This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favorite joke

I went to go visit my friend Chuck on his farm out in Greater Minnesota, and he's showing off his barn, crops, and livestock. When we get to the swine corral, there's an enormous boar... with three wooden legs.

So I ask him, "why does that pig have three wooden legs?"

"Well, Steve, tha...

I feel bad for whoever took the silver in fencing.

Their dreams of gold were foiled.

I was all set to be the world's greatest supervillain, but first I had to win a fencing duel.

Alas, I was in anguish when I lost, for my plans had been Foiled.

A plan to rob a bris was foiled by the Rabbi today...

Police are still baffled at how he managed to get a tip off!

What foiled the Presidents suicide attempt?

Fake Noose

Today my dinner plans were foiled...

Potatoes on the BBQ

(P+L)(A+N) = PA+PN+LA+LN

Ha! I just foiled your plan!

Why does aluminum make a great bad guy?

Because it is easily foiled.

First day as a superhero

Villian: why is my calendar wrapped in aluminum?


Me: I foiled your plans

Two scientists walk into a bar...

The first one says, "I'd like some H2O."
The second says, "And I'll have some H2... wait. Why aren't you just referring to water by its normal name? I mean, I know it's our job, but we're just getting a drink."

The first scientist slams the table angrily, for his assassination scheme had ...

I was planning on taking leftovers from the party.

All my plans were foiled.

An art thief once stole some very expensive paintings from the Louvre in Paris. He took two Van Goghs, a couple Monets, a DeGas, and some other paintings.

Everything went perfectly, except he was captured sitting in his van with the paintings only 2 blocks from the museum, his van had run out of fuel!

When asked by the police how he could plan such a successful robbery and then be foiled by such a simple error, he replied...

"I had no ...

I had a brilliant plan to cover my neighbor's farm in plastic to destroy his business, but when I returned from the store with the cellophane, he had already enveloped my farm entirely with Reynolds wrap.

It seems my plot was foiled.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had a plan to wrap up my leftovers from the restaurant in a sturdy to-go box...

...then the waitress came by and foiled the whole thing.

In the City of Loafington, there lived a superhero named Wonderbread.

Wonderbread was, predictably, a superhero with bread-themed powers. He could beat up a gang with a baguette, trap someone in a giant pita, or cushion someone's fall with swiftly-rising dough. He was beloved by all in the city, for his escapades had the lovely side-effect of feeding the entire city f...

What did the winless fencer say when he lost another bout

"Curses, foiled again!"

Did you hear about the architect who only had aluminum sheets for stationary?

His plans were foiled.

I love laying naked on a bear skin rug in front of a fireplace.

But apparently there are rules against this at cracker barrel... -_-

::sigh:: foiled again!

I forgot to buy baking paper

Looks like my cooking will be foiled again...

There was a failed art theft today...

the robber reportedly was foiled because he didn't have enough Monet for Degas to make the Van Gogh.

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