UPJOKE
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It turns out, 'Fox News' has no actual coverage of foxes.

I was also disappointed by BBC news.

After a group of scientists invented a tasteless orally ingestible Covid vaccine they had a meeting to decide which products would be best to put it in to get to finally get to 100% coverage in America.

Ranch dressing will get 98% and Horse dewormer paste to cover the last 2%

I tried to buy a life insurance policy today

They said all I could afford was coverage for lightning strikes

Politician visited a village in India.

A politician visited an Indian village and asked what their needs were.
”We have 2 basic needs sir,” replied the villager.
“Firstly, we have a hospital, but there’s no doctor.”


On hearing this, the politician whipped out his cellphone, and after speaking for a while he reassur...

With all this media coverage about the clowns...

I'll be so glad when the election is over.

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An Australian joke (but it may translate..)

ScoMo (the Australian Prime Minister, right wing, evangelical, ex marketing specialist) is visiting a remote indigenous village, surrounded by the fawning Murdoch press. He speaks to the village elder and asks him how he can make the locals lives better.

"Well," says the elder, "We've got two...

Will there be 4G coverage on Mars?

Sadly it'll only be 0.4g.

Why is the suicide bomber getting so much coverage?

I mean seriously, the guy is all over the place!

Last week I went to the AT&T headquarters in Dallas to file a formal complaint about their poor wireless coverage

When I walked into the lobby no one was there. There was a front desk with a few phones and computers. Taped to the back of one of the monitors was a note:

"Currently no receptionist in this area"

Volvo pulls its ads from 'Hannity' after Moore coverage

Volvo owners begin smashing their cars in protest.

House republicans couldn't agree on contraceptive coverage...

... so they just pulled out instead.

A politician visits a remote village to garner some votes. He gathers a group of villagers and ask what problems they face.

One guy says crying "sir, we have not had water for months, our crops are dying, we are suffering"

On hearing this the politician takes out his phone and talks into it. "I want all the fields washed with water poured from helicopters." He puts the phone back in his pocket and asks " Ok, what...

A politician visits a rural area to gain appeal for the upcoming elections

He schedules a meeting with the local leaders to discuss problems the town has been experiencing so that he could provide help and solutions.

"Governor, our town has been experiencing two big problems," says one of the leaders

The politician pounds his table, "Ok tell me what they are,...

Four insurance companies are in competition.

One comes up with the slogan, "Coverage from the cradle to the grave."


The Second one tries to improve on that with, "Coverage from the womb to the tomb."


Not to be outdone, the third one comes up with, "From the sperm to the worm."


The fourth insurance company re...

A team of British archaeologists dug to a depth of 15 feet and found an intricate network of copper wires.

From this, the team concluded that the Britain was advanced enough to have telephone connections in their cities 150 years ago.

In response to this, American archaeologists started their own expedition. They dug up to a depth of 20 feet and found an even more expansive network of copper wires...

Some actors are famous for playing the same role in multiple movies, but none so much as Lee Navarre.

Lee Navarre had starred in a couple of low budget films like Greta's Gallery and Fisherman Flanagan, but no one really took note of him till he was seen in the first movie of the mystery series "When Midnight Chimes". As we all know, it was an instant hit and Navarre gained a lot of critical acclaim...

You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.

You just have to have cell coverage.

Homeless man tells the tale

I talked with a homeless man this morning and asked him how he ended up this way.

He said, “Up until last week, I still had it all. I had plenty to eat, my clothes were washed and pressed, I had a roof over my head, I had HDTV and Internet, and I went to the gym, the pool, and the library. I ...

Government official visits a remote village

An official once went on a field trip to one of the small remote villages.

He asked, what can the government do for you?

They replied: we have a health center, but there is no doctor.

He immediately picked up his phone and dialed

a number and in a very strong voice deman...

The Exam

Three Highschool Sr's decided to blow off their final exam for their logic class, and spend the day getting wasted.

When they returned to class the next day they explained to the professor that they were unable to get to class the day before due to a flat tire and no cell phone coverage in th...

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An engineer dies and goes to hell...

He is welcomed by his orientation demon, who shows him around and explains how things work. The engineer notices that a lot of things aren't working and are in dire need of fixing. The air conditioning is busted, the network is overloaded, there's power shortages everywhere, everything is overheatin...

Sales pitch

Bubba Joe's first military assignment was to a military induction center, and, because he was a good talker, they assigned him the duty of advising new recruits about the government benefits, especially the GI insurance to which they were entitled.

Before long the Captain in charge of the ind...

A politician walks into a small town...

An election campaign politician visits a small town and asks the mayor what problems do they have. He replies that they have two problems. The first one is that they have a hospital but they don't have a doctor.

The politician takes out his mobile phone, makes a call and discusses for a while...

They stopped putting pictures of missing kids on milk cartons, and started posting them on r/jokes

They get much wider coverage. No one reposts more than r/jokes.

I needed some paddles for my canoe

So I found someone selling some on Craigslist. I went over, but his directions were all screwed up and there wasn't any cell coverage so it took me three hours to find the place. And then when I got there he tried to charge me four times what he'd posted on the site! So I argued with him for wha...

My jean jacket doesn't fit right

I can only fit my arms in the leg holes but I don't have torso or back coverage

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A wizard is walking through a cemetery one day. . .

A wizard is walking through a cemetery one day, and after paying his respects to an old friend he walks past two grave markers that each had a statue of the person buried in the grave. Both statues looked across a wide space toward each other with sadness and longing. The wizard read the epitaphs to...

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Why did the stripper need more insurance?

She had little to no coverage.

Sir, I pulled over a VIP and I'm not sure what to do.

When the Pope was visiting Philadelphia, PA this past year there was an incident that did not get any coverage in the news. The Pope after leaving the church went to his limosuine and was feeling a bit impulsive and decided he wanted to drive. So he asked the limo driver if he could drive, the dri...

How to catch a bear.

Dig a deep hole, fill it with twigs and other pieces of firewood, and burn the wood. When the wood is all good and burned, cover the hole with some sort of coverage, and open a can of vegetables, like peas and place the peas all around the entrance to the hole. Hide somewhere downwind of the hole...

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The hospital is being audited

The auditor, accompanied by the hr manager, visits one department after another, until they reach a room where the nurses are giving hand jobs to the patients. The auditor is appalled and demands explanation. The hr manager explains that the patients in this area suffer from a condition which demand...

What kind of insurance do you buy for a horse and buggy?

Foal coverage

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Health insurance is rare for exotic dancers.

Most strippers have little or no coverage.

What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson?

A gap in coverage.

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