They told me i wouldn’t be good at poetry because i’m dyslexic

But so far I’ve made 3 jugs and a vase and they are lovely.

Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist?

He sold his soul to Santa.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I hate being dyslexic. I went to a movie theater to see some cop porn

And all I got was this lousy popcorn.

Did you hear about the dyslexic alcoholic?

He drank himself into an earl grey

Two dyslexics

Two dyslexics walk into a bra

My son’s dyslexic, and every year at Christmas, he gets all excited and writes his little list of all the presents he wants, and then he goes and sends it off to Satan.

Well, actually I send it off to Satan because he can’t spell.

Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac?

He stayed up all night wondering if there really was a dog.

My best mate’s dyslexic and one of our teachers suggested he try poetry

He’s made 3 vases so far

Dyslexic walks into a bar

Gets slapped and called a pervert.

Why was the dyslexic dog a Christian?

Because he believes in himself.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My teacher told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic,

Well I just made 2 vases and a jug, so fuck you Mr McDonald.

My mate is a dyslexic atheist...

He doesn't believe there is one true dog.

What do you call a drunk, dyslexic CD

Floppy diks

I fell in love with a dyslexic vegetarian

It's going great but she refuses to meat me

What does a dyslexic zombie say?

Brians

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I once had a dyslexic chemist call me out on my bullshit.

He called me a hypochlorite.

Had an encounter with dyslexic witch..

I am safe cause she couldn't spell.

Q: What is the burning question on the mind of every dyslexic existentialist?

A: "Is there a dog?"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I met a dyslexic sapiosexual today

They said they were very attracted to my brian.

Did you hear about the dyslexic guy that sold his soul to Satan?

He is now forced to make presents in the North Pole for all eternity.

Justin Timberlake admitted to being dyslexic.

Take a moment to let that N'Sync

What kind of breath mints do dyslexic military officers use?

Tac-tics

Me and my dyslexic girlfriend sitting in a tree

K S I S I N G

Guys did you hear about the dyslexic guy who wanted to kill all gingers

He used to be a KKK member

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the horny dyslexic with a uniform fetish?

He bought popcorn.

My son is dyslexic. Every year he writes his Christmas wishlist...

...and sends it off to Satan.

My teacher told me I'd never be good at poetry because I'm dyslexic.

But so far I've made three jugs and a vase and they're lovely.



Edit to add: Thank you for the Gold and Silvers kind strangers!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Poor Dyslexic James (long, original)

James was dyslexic. Because of this, he always struggled in school. He was embarrassed by his dyslexia and never let on or got help for his problems, so his grades suffered. His teachers and guidance counsellors told him he’d never amount to anything. All his life, James just wanted to prove them wr...

A man hires a dyslexic hitman and comes home to find his tabby, Mittens, murdered.

Understandably upset he calls the hitman to find out what happened.


“What the hell did I pay you for? My wife is still here and now our little pet is dead. Did you even read my instructions?”


“What are you talking about I did exactly as…Ohhhhh. I thought you wanted me to off t...

How do dyslexic rabbits pass the time?

They buck like funnies.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dyslexic Prostitute

Did you hear about the dyslexic hooker?
She ended up working at a warehouse.

How do you tell a dyslexic person made a Reddit post?

Edit: spelling.

It's not easy being a dyslexic devil worshiper

If you're not careful, you could end up selling your soul to Santa

How many lightbulbs does it take to change a dyslexic?

You may wanna read that again chief.

How did the dyslexic cop subdue the violent male suspect ?

He used his NUTS gun.

Oh, you’re dyslexic? You should join the DNS

The national dyslexia society!

How do dyslexic cows organise their time?

With a dairy

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two dyslexics run into a bank and shout

Air in the hands mother stickers! This is a fuck up!

There was once a dyslexic who decided to become a pimp

but ended up buying a warehouse

Fellow bad speller and dyslexic let's join forces:

Bad Spellers Untied!

My dyslexic uncle ruined Christmas...

He warped all the presents

How does a dyslexic atheist feel about God?

He thinks that they’re truly man’s best friend.

Why did the dyslexic association of America stop having their meetings at the YMCA?

They all showed up at Macys.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why could you see the dyslexic girls boobs?

Because she set the bra too low.

I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.

There’s no files on me.

Why did the dyslexic man call his horse "ho"

He was trying to keep her mane short

There was this dyslexic who kept accidentally praying to his dog.

One day, he got so frustrated with it that he sold his soul to Santa.

What did the dyslexic child call his parents?

MOM and DAD.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Have you heard about the dyslexic homosexual rooster?

Dude’ll do a cock!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why can't dyslexics tell jokes?

They always punch up the fuck line

Why did the dyslexic wizard get kicked out of school?

He couldn't spell

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the dyslexic employee at the concession stand at the movie theatre get arrested?

For bootlegging copporn !!!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear the one about the horny, dyslexic, narcoleptic?

He kept falling asleep in warehouses.

A dyslexic IT worker

waited hours for a USB, then 3 came at once.

When life hands you melons...

You might be dyslexic

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

what does the dyslexic robber say?

put the air in your hands mother sticker this is a fuck up

I'm dyslexic but hoping to get a law degree.

One that I can really sue.

Is it possible for an evil spirit to be dyslexic ?

Asking for a fiend.

A dyslexic wine connoisseur went to a wine tasting event...

...one wine he tasted was only half decent at best.

When asked to write a short review he wrote: "It's oaky, but not nearly okay enough."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Who did the dyslexic Jedi hunt down?

The Shit Lord

What did the dyslexic man order at the Italian restaurant?

Tapas

I went on a date with a dyslexic girl, and

she ended up cooking my sock.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

He gets beaten by the woman wearing it as that's not how dyslexia works

Never trust a dyslexic person's tarp

It could be a trap!

Original (I think)

I'm in Denali about being dyslexic

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A dyslexic kid once told me,

"I put the 'sexy' in dyslexia."

Dyslexics of Reddit..

UNTIE!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I refuse to believe I'm dyslexic and gay

I'm in Daniel

Why did the dyslexic kid push his brother out of the window?

He wanted to see Tim fly.

Why do dyslexic chess players have such fresh breath?

Because they're so good at finding Tic Tacs.

Why did dyslexic Karen go to the Christmas nativity?

To see the manger.

What is a dyslexic's favorite food group?

I'm not certain, but they seem to write to "Dear Dairy" quite a bit...

Why did the dyslexic person drink the potion?

Because it was the only option

What do you call a dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?

A man who lies awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.



My dad told me this joke, my apologies if it came from somewhere else.

Your Honor, I'm dyslexic

I couldn't possibly finish my sentence

What is a dyslexic person's preferred alternative energy source?

It's unclear

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I put the sexy in dyslexic

Oh wait

Why does a Dyslexic Ship Captain with Coprophobia never pay his taxes?

He’s afraid of the Sea’s Fee.

Dyslexics Beware! (OC)

Tomorrow is Friday the 31st!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do dyslexic prostitutes and veterinarians have in common?

They’re always talking about sick ducks.

Why did the dyslexic republican politician have to suspend his campaign?

Because he vowed to put an end to texas.

Did you hear about the dyslexic that committed suicide?

He jumped behind a sub.

Have you heard about the dyslexic who was working too hard on his imagination skills?

He ended up in Santa Fe.

Why can't dyslexic people use the internet in China?

Because they get a virus when they open a bat

A group of dyslexic men form a soccer team

When they got down to the name of their team they went with "Dyslexia untied"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dyslexic hype man:

Let’s do shit this!

My dyslexic support group held a slam poetry competition

Doug got first with a great piece about racial tensions in America.

Anna got second with a touching monologue about women's rights.

I got third by smashing an urn.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.