UPJOKE
sounddrum kitsnare drumtambourinetimpanicymbalbeatdjembebandcylinderjazzcrammusicpercussionbass drum

Drums Jokes

The Drums Must Not Stop

A man was exploring the African jungle and came upon a tribe of natives, their presence underscored by the distinctive and monotonous beating of drums. The man spoke with the tribe and they allowed him to stay with them and sleep on their grounds.

The first night, the man didn't sleep a wink ...

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff...

Ba dum tiss....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My next door neighbour is an inconsiderate asshole. He knocked on my door at 3AM last night!! 3AM!!

Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums.

People are like drums.

They make noise when you hit them with sticks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was visiting my friend when I saw a set of drums

So I asked him, why do you have it, you don't even play the drums. He said that was not his drums, it was his clock. I was dumbfounded so I asked how and he says, I'll play it loud and night and the neighbours yell which asshole is playing drums at 3 in the morning.

My neighboor rang my doorbell at 5 am..

Luckily I was already up, playing drums.

Playing the drums might hurt your arms...

...but playing the accordion could really harm a knee.

"When drums stop...very bad."

An English explorer was trekking through a remote jungle with a local wise man he had hired as a guide. Two days into their journey, far from civilization, they began to hear the faint, slow beating of drums in the distance.

*Dum. Dum. Dum. Dum.*

The Englishman said to the wise man, “I...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So there's a farm. On this farm, there's a cow, a chicken, and a horse, and the three of them are best friends.

They do just about everything together. And one day, they're sitting at the window of the house, and the farmer's kid is watching MTV, and they're watching it, and they hear the music, and the horse says "you know what? I'm gonna learn how to do that."

So the horse calls up Guitar Center, and...

Jungle Drums

An anthropologist went to study a far-flung tropical island. He found a guide with a canoe to take him upriver to the remote site where he would make his observations. About noon on the second day of travel up the river they began to hear drums. The anthropologist asked his guide, "What are those dr...

I repaired my drums after my son broke it...

Now he has to deal with the repercussions.

I used to play drums when I was little,

and I stopped after a couple years. But during my teenage years I forced myself to relearn the instrument just so I can show the world that I’m not afraid of repercussion

Drums good. Drums stop, bad.

A rich businessman is reading the newspaper one day, and stumbles across an article about North Sentinel Island and the indigenous people there who are virtually untouched by modern civilization. He decides on the spot, that he must see them for himself, however it is illegal to travel there. No mat...

I was air drumming some Metallica at a stop light.

I lost a drumstick out the window and quickly changed to Def Leppard.

I'm good at playing loud on the trumpet, guitar, and drums.

But piano was never really my forte.

How do you describe how Al Gore plays drums?

Al-Gore-rhythms!

I regret joining a band with a turkey on drums.

He usually forgets his drumsticks so he has to wing it.

What happens when you play the drums incorrectly?

You get repercussions

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A horse...

... sees a rock band perform and thinks "Hey, I could do that." The horse calls up his local music store and is like "I wanna learn guitar, just one problem, I'm a horse." The employee says "don't worry we can do that." The horse goes, learns guitar for a few months, gets really good, and is pretty ...

Was playing air drums to AC/DC the other day when I dropped my stick...

...had to switch to Def Leopard

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whats the difference between drumming and sex?

You can drum your fingers

but you cant finger your drums

Two cowboys were riding through a canyon and from far off they heard the sound of drumming.

One of them said, "I don't like the sound of those drums." And a distant voice called out "He's not our regular drummer!"

I told my drums, cymbals, xylophones, gongs, bells, and rattles players to play their part twice...

...but they didn't, so there are going to be re-percussions.

I played the drums once, but I swore never to do it again.

I didn't want to deal with repercussions.

I used to play air drums for Rush in my car until I lost a stick out the window.

Now I can only play for Def Leopard.

Why can't the drums never stop?

A man goes on vacation to a tropical island. As soon as he gets off the plane, he hears drums. He thinks, "Wow, this is cool."

He goes to the beach, he hears the drums, he eats lunch, he hears drums, he goes to a luau, and he hears drums. He TRIES to go to sleep, he hears drums.

This g...

I see children like I see bongo drums

They're slightly irritating but it's fashionable for the rich to bring them back from Africa

I told my music teacher I wanted to play the drums.

He said "Beat it!"

One for the bassists of Reddit

A team of scientists were exploring a newly discovered island with a handful of different tribes that had been living there for centuries, and were being led by a guide of one of the peaceful tribes.

As the trek went on, the jungle continued to get thicker. As they got deeper into the jungle...

It was reported some of the bands performing tonight like to hide drugs in there drums.

But don't worry, we've taken the proper percussions

So, there was a Horse, a Sheep and a Chicken and they lived in a barn

The horse had long dreamed of learning to play the guitar.


So the horse rings a music shop and he says, “Hey, I’d love to learn to play guitar. Is there anyone who can teach me”?


The music shop manager says “That’s not an issue, let’s get you started on some music lessons.” ...

What does a blonde playing the drums sound like?

Dumb chick dumb chick dumb chick...

I paid a fish to come over to re-key my guitar, piano and drums.

He was a professional tuna.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.