Boating Jokes - 8 Hilarious Boating Jokes

I've started a boating business from my attic.

The sails are going through the roof.

upvote

downvote

report

A woman goes out boating one day...

A woman takes the boat out one afternoon, but does not come back. The next day, her husband answers a knock at the door to two grim-faced State Troopers.

"Good afternoon sir, regarding your wife we have some bad news, good news, and really great news. Which do you want to hear first?"
...

upvote

downvote

report

Boating sounds like a terrible idea on paper

But it's a thousand times better on water.

upvote

downvote

report

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Will I Live to see 80?

Will I Live to see 80?

Here's something to think about.

I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, He
said I was doing fairly well for my age.

A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, 'Do you think ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Boating accident

Paddy and Mary divorced a year ago. Paddy was boating with his son Michael when a storm came up and they both drowned.

Officer Murphy had to tell Mary the news. "Well, Mary I have good news and bad news."

"Give me the bad news first."

"Your ex has drowned in a boating accident....

I’m considering a career change to global boating logistics...

...so when people ask what I do, I can say that I spread my seamen all over the world.

upvote

downvote

report

I went boating with cast of friends the other day...

None of them could use an oar, but Lisa Kudrow.

Sorry.

upvote

downvote

report

I once knew a Nurse who was really into boating...

... she was always going down on the docs.

upvote

downvote

report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.