Tugboat Jokes - 8 Hilarious Tugboat Jokes

What did one tugboat say to the other tugboat?

BWOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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I decided not to get my son a race car bed because they were all poor quality.

I went with a tugboat bed because it’s still cool, and the quality is much better. Really ship shape.

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I walked past the charthouse on the tugboat and saw Larry scribbling on the map.

I'm sure he's plotting something!

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Way down upon the Mississippi, two tugboat captains who had been friends for years, would always cry "Aye!" and blow their whistles whenever they passed each other

A new crewman asked his boat's mate, "What do they do that for?"

The mate looked surprised and replied, "You mean that you've never heard of an aye for an aye and a toot for a toot?"

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How did the tugboat get AIDS?

It was rear-ended by a ferry.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a cruise ship where the crew won’t stop masturbating in front of passengers?

A tugboat

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My dick may not be twelve inches...

But it sure smells like a foot.

Heard that from an old tugboat captain today and I had to share.

Last went to temple when I was 13. Still remember this "joke."

A man jumps into the ocean and decides to put his life in God's hands. He is treading water for 45 mins when a tugboat comes by. The captain shouts to him, "get in and we will take you to shore!" The man calls back, "no thanks, I'm waiting for God to save me." The captain looks perplexed but dri...

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