Newsflash! Tanker truck carrying brine has crashed and spilled its contents all over the highway.
Motorists are reported to be in a pickle.
There are two boats (tankers) about to collide at sea.
One is filled with purple paint, the other with red paint.
All the survivors were marooned.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
A black piece of tarmac walks into a bar.
A black piece of tarmac walks into a bar, strolls up to the bar and sighs "give me a Guinness mate"
The bartender gives him his drink and asks "rough day? ", the black piece of tarmac replies "aye I'm part of the A1 North and I've had all sorts over me today. 12 fucking lorries,...
Irish Vs. English
An English naval vessel is called to attention by an Irish Guard.
Irish: Aye, approaching vessel, I advise ye turn 15 degrees south to avoid a collision.
The English Captain replies: "Negative, sir. We advise you redirect 15 degrees north to avoid said collision."
Irish: I repea...
French investigators aren’t sure how the fire started. But Quasimodo said:
Perhaps flying water tankers could be used to put it out.
Two tanker ships collided and sank in the southern Pacific Ocean yesterday. One was filled with red paint and the other, smaller tanker, was filled with blue paint. All crew members survived but now are marooned on an uninhabited island.
(Thanks to The Two Ronnies for this oldie)
A truck driver is heading west across the Arizona desert. He has been driving all night, and as the sun starts to rise, he feels the need to stop and commune with nature.
He pulls to the side of the road, parks, and walks out into the sage brush. As he is standing there, looking around at the beauty of the early morning, he notices a lever sticking out of the ground. After a few moments, he walks over, walks all the way around, and then reaches out to grasp the le...