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Acknowledging Jokes

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Antonio dreamt of meeting the Pope

He put on his best Armani suit to attend mass at the Vatican. In the row of pews in front of him, Antonio noticed a bum in dirty, raggedy clothes. During the processional the Pope came up the aisle acknowledging and reaching out to people along the way. Sure enough the Pope headed toward Antonio. He...

A woman was taking her late husband to the undertakers.

He was wearing his best suit, a charcoal grey suit. The woman knew it was her husbands dying wish to be buried in a blue suit, something that they had never been able to afford when he was alive. So, she told the undertaker about her husband's wish, acknowledging that she couldn't afford a new suit,...

The number game

A redhead is walking along a railroad track saying "24, 24, 24, 24," etc. A blonde asks "watchable doing?" The redhead just continues on without acknowledging her, so the blonde begins walking along the track repeating "24" as well. A train comes and the redhead stepped off the track. The blonde is ...

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(*bad pun goes here*)

(*necessary edit acknowledging upvotes and more bad puns in comments*)

(*necessary second edit for the anon's gold*)

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Baseball

A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet. One day, the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet as well. Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in here, isn't it? "Yes it is. " the man repli...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In medieval times in Rome, the Pope, influenced by some conservative advisers, decided to expel all Jews from the city

The Pope, not wanting to seem as forcing his decision on the Jews, allowed a debate to be held so the Jews could defend their citizenship.

That night, the Jewish Rabbis gathered in the synagogue to decide who will debate against the Pope. However none of the Rabbis wanted to debate against hi...

Guardian Angel

A man was walking by a construction site when he heard a woman yell "STOP!!!" The man stopped abruptly, and seconds later a brick fell and landed in his path. He looked around but saw no trace of the woman whose voice he heard.


A day or two after that, he was driving to work. In the midst...

A guy goes to the ENT Doctor and says:

"Listen doc, my wife is slowly becoming deaf. What should I do? How can I cure her?"
The doctor answers: "Well, take her to me and I'll see what I can do."
But the guy says: "No, I don't want to."
The doctor is surprised and says: "Why? How can I make a diagnose without seeing her?" ...

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