What does being Catalonian and not being acknowledged as an independent country feel like?

It Spain.

A business man got on an elevator in a building.

When he entered the elevator, there was a blonde already inside and she greeted him by saying, “T-G-I-F” (letters only).
He smiled at her and replied, “S-H-I-T” (letters only).”
She looked at him, puzzled, and said, “T-G-I-F” again.
He acknowledged her remark again by answering, “S-H-I-T.”<...

New Pope

There were two Roman Catholic boys, Timothy Murphy and Antonio Secola whose lives paralleled each other in amazing ways. In the same year Timothy was born in Ireland, Antonio was born in Italy. Faithfully, they attended parochial school from kindergarten through their senior year in High School.
...

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Bill Clinton and the Pope die on the same day, and due to some administrative foul up, Clinton gets sent to heaven and the Pope gets sent to hell.

The Pope explains the situation to the hell administration, they check their paperwork, and the error is acknowledged. They explain, however, that it will take about 24 hours to make the switch.

The next day, the Pope is called in and the hell administration bids him farewell and he heads for...

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Square testicles

An elderly woman walked into the Royal Bank of Ireland one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money.


After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is alwa...

Starbucks has starting to offer free drinks during funerals

They acknowledged the need for mourning coffees

Little Henry’s father

Little Henry was in class and the teacher announced that they were going to try something different to help everyone get to know each other a little better, and to help with their spelling.
She explained, "I want you to stand up and give us the occupation of your father, spell it, and say one thi...

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NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN:

**NOTICE IS HEREBY GIVEN:**

Please be advised that anyone planning to dash through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are required to undergo a full Risk Assessment addressing the safety of open sleighs. This assessment must also consider wheth...

A rich man died and went to Heaven.

He stood at the pearly gates, waiting his turn to talk to St. Peter. He noticed a sign that said you can bring one briefcase full of anything you want from Earth. He noticed a stack of empty briefcases to the side and picked one up.

When the rich man got to Peter, the saint acknowledged him a...

A comedian was on vacation in London.

A comedian was on a vacation in London when he came across a large crowd. He pushed and squeezed his way past the ocean of people and saw the Royal Family who were on their way to have lunch. As he takes out his phone to snap a photo, he saw from the corner of his eye a shady man pushing past the cr...

Why don’t we pronounce k in knowledge

We haven’t acknowledged it yet

I’ll walk myself out

The Redditor Named Jock

After years of intense research, Jock had figured out a cure to every illness and disease known to man, mainly using Reddit as his go-to website.
Throughout his research, Jock had only confided in one person, his trustworthy PA. Because of this, Jock had never been acknowledged for his work, and...

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were walking through a park...

They passed three women sitting on a bench each eating a banana. All three women greeted Sherlock Holmes "Good afternoon Mr. Holmes." and Sherlock acknowledged each woman with a nod and a smile.

When they were some distance away, Dr. Watson turned to him and asked "Sherlock do you know thos...

A man just bought a religious horse...

A man was searching for the fastest and noblest steed. Finally, after much searching, he finally found a horse he was satisfied with. Its mane was silky, its coat was glossy, and it was the finest stallion that the man has ever laid his eyes upon.

While paying for the stallion, the seller rem...

Mrs. Smith is having trouble with her husband falling asleep in church...

... and it was really embarrassing for her to be seen with him constantly nodding off. So Mrs. Smith asks the preacher before Sunday service if he has any ideas for her. He thinks about it, then hands her a pin and says, "Every time I signal you with this gesture, poke your husband with this pin." M...

A man visits an enchanted wishing well,

deep inside a forest. This well, unlike most wishing wells, had a peculiar quality: as well as granting wishes, it could talk. That made it, in some sense, alive.

So the man knelt in front of the well, and spake his wish: "Please, enchanted well. Grant me the wish of death upon the man who be...

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Dear Santa

Dear Santa,

How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone
4 for Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.

Merry Christma...

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So Three People Died...

Three "perfect" people had died. These people had never done anything wrong in their entire lives, and had never sinned. Because of this, they were not acknowledged as living a full life: therefore, an angel had met them halfway to Heaven.

"You three have not committed any sins in your entir...

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Phil dies and is met by the Devil in front of three doors.

The Devil takes him to one side. 'Look, Phil,' he says, 'we're trying something out to cut down on admin down here. We used to assign punishments to the damned that fit their sins, but now we're letting people choose themselves.'

He gestures to the three doors. 'What I can do for you is this:...

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"Whoever can answer who quoted these gets to stay home from school Monday..."

"'Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo'. So, who said this one?" Patty, a Chinese girl in the class replies with "H. G. Wells." "Correct" the teacher says "enjoy your day..." Patty interrupts saying "I am a proud Chinese and I value my education, I will be here Monday."

"Ok... How about ...

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