UPJOKE
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Umbrellas Jokes

I don't trust umbrellas.

They're shady.

A man went to get his umbrellas repaired.

He brought eight umbrellas to the repair shop and came home by bus. He absentmindedly took the umbrella of the woman next to him as he got up to leave and she cried, "STOP! THIEF!". He sheepishly gave it back and got off the bus. A few days later he collected his umbrellas from the repairer and g...

Don't tell clever jokes about umbrellas.

They just go over people's heads !

Here’s the oldest dirty joke I know

Ethyl and Gladys walk the same route every day, and they stop at the same bench to smoke a cigarette before finishing their walk back to their apartments.


One day, just as they lit their cigarette, it starts to rain. Neither ladies brought umbrellas.


Gladys, the innovator s...

why do people carry umbrellas?

because umbrellas cant walk.
(ba dum tsss)

i suck at jokes :((((

You know how i know you play bullet hell?

You don't own any umbrellas for rainy days.

Today I let a woman stand under my umbrella

So the number of women who got wet because of me is down to -1

Saw a man selling umbrellas in the rain today.

He ironically was umbrella-less. When I asked him why, he replied: "Man, I don't stay dry off my own supply."

A teacher asks class to draw and colour a duck holding an umbrella

She notices Jerry colouring his duck blue and asks "where did you see a blue duck?" He replies "where did you see a duck holding an umbrella?"

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