I wanted to tell a joke about planes

but I think it'll just go over your heads...

I Once met a old man who said he took down 23 planes on WWII

he was the worse mechanic i've ever seen

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Baby Planes

A mother and her son were flying on Southwest Airlines. The son, who had been looking out the window, turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs, and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?" The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the...

What do you call a 60 year old Canadian woman who flys planes over the pacific ocean for living?

A pilot.

Why do babies always cry on planes?

Because they go from at no fear to atmosphere!

I have 1,800 nuclear missiles, 283 battle ships, 9,400 planes.. I spend more on my military than the next 12 nations combined and despite spending more every year I still feel insecure...

I have a military-industrial complex.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A russian, an american and a dane are drinking beer, and get into a bragging contest.

The russian says: "Our navy is so large that if all the ships set out to sea at once, the fish in the ocean won't have a single spot where they can reach the surface"

The american looks sceptically at him and says: "Well, our mighty airforce is so large that if all the planes take off at once...

Standing in Schiphol airport, I overheard the two women next to me. One was trying to remember the name of the Dutch company that builds jet planes. I knew the answer and thought....

Fokker.

My grandfather destroyed over a hundred German planes during WW2

He was the worst mechanic in the German Airforce.

A joke my Polish friend loved.

[Full of errors I'm sure. On to the brilliant joke.]

A polish farmeris tilling his field. It's another beautiful spring day when suddenly his plough hits something. Upon inspection he sees that it's some sort of golden lamp. He dusts it off and a genie comes out of it and says to the humble p...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Ireland Declares War on France

The French President is sitting in his office when his telephone rings.

"Hallo!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy Down at the Harp Pub in County Clare, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," the President of France ...

I’ve never understood the idea of invisible planes.

I just can’t see them taking off.

Throughout WWII, my great-grandfather was responsible for 43 German planes going down.

He was the worst mechanic in the Luftwaffe.

With the massive downturn in international travel, aircraft manufacturer Fokker has started developing planes for the military. Their latest is a small, super stealthy reconnaissance plane that is almost undetectable!

It's called the Sneaky Little Fokker.

A man spots an empty beach as he frantically searches for a place to land his plane.

He's run out fuel but he is a skilled enough pilot to guide his aircraft down and gracefully crash into the sand. He comes in at a small angle and exits his vehicle without a scratch on him.

"Damn it, what could have gone wrong?" He ponders for a short while before he starts assessing the da...

My grandfather was responsible for 35 downed German planes in WWII.

Still to this day he holds the record as the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.

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