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Simpson Jokes

Did you hear that OJ Simpson finally confessed?

Yep. They squeezed it out of him.

I was heartbroken the day OJ Simpson was acquitted…

I’d already picked out which TV I wanted…

Why can’t Bart Simpson go to the bar?

Because of the BartEnder

What is Homer Simpson’s Favorite State?

Colora-doh’!

What is OJ Simpson's computer password?

Slash Slash back-Slash escape.

What does Homer Simpson do all day as he recovers from monkeypox?

He watches "The Itchy and Scratchy Show".

What does Scottish Bart Simpson say

Aye, caramba






He is also called McSimpson

What martial art does Homer Simpson practice?

Jeet Kune D’oh!

Why does Moe syzlak from the Simpsons, hate Bart Simpsons?

Cause he is a bartender

What is Homer Simpson's favorite part of a pizza?

The D'oh!



This one occurred to me while I was making pizza today. Yeah, clearly I'm 6...

Bart Simpson goes to a bar

He introduces himself to the barkeep and orders a drink that is enthusiastically provided to him.
Bart downs the drink, keels over and dies.

A patron sitting at the bar observing all this exclaims to the bar keep, "Oh my God! What just happened? Did you just poison Bart Simpson?!"

T...

If the Simpsons entered a witness protection program, what would Homer's alias be?

John D'oh!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Marge Simpson was one of TV’s first LGBTQ+ characters

She was animation’s first Homer-sexual

Word on the street OJ Simpson is getting married again..

Sounds like he wanted to take another stab at it.

Oj Simpson is ready to remarry...

He knows the last marriage didn't end so well... but he's ready to take another stab at it.

Robert Khardasian was OJ Simpson's lawyer

And thus began the family tradition of getting black men off.

OJ Simpson was in a different kind of courtroom this week attempting to regain custody of his two children.

In order to prove to the court how much he loves his kids, OJ pointed out quote "Hey, they’re still alive, aren’t they?"

- An ol' chunk of coal

Remember when OJ Simpson was found innocent and all of us white people hit the street looting and damaging property?!

Oh, that's right, we didn't...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An old Simpson's joke.

A man walks into a bar, and sits down on a barstool, placing a small brown bag on the counter next to him. He signals to the bartender and then proceeds to down 3 shots of scotch.

The bartender, being no fool asks, “Hey man what’s wrong?”

Without replying the man slowly reaches over an...

What’s the difference between OJ Simpson and Christopher Reeve?

OJ got to walk, Christopher got the chair

OJ Simpson was being interviewed the other day. The reporter asked if he'd considered getting married again.

OJ said he had thought about taking another stab at it.

Albert Einstein and Homer Simpson had a bet.

Albert Einstein says “If I can’t answer your question, i’ll give you a million dollars. If you can’t answer my question, you have to give me five dollars.”

Homer says “ok”

Albert Einstein says “I’ll start: What is the capital of France?”

Homer says “lol idk”

Homer gives E...

What is Homer Simpson's favorite toy?

Play D'oh

Ford is working on a special edition O.J. Simpson Bronco

But instead of white it will be Nicole Brown with blood red interior

Man o.j simpson was a great football player

He killed it on and off the field

In which Australian city does Homer Simpson fling his son around?

Throwbart

What's Homer Simpson's favorite song?

Sweet Child D'oh! Mine

What Simpson's character does the best power points ?

Slideshow Bob

My 10 year old Son just came up with this one and I couldn't be more proud: What's Batman's favourite fruit?

A Banananananananananananananananana

EDIT: Thank you everyone for the awards and kind words! Just to clarify:

* Yes, he does know the 60's batman theme. My partner loves campy batman so it was inevitable. [The Simpsons](https://youtu.be/TQepz5rsS6E?t=88) also made sure of that.
* Gi...

What's the difference between OJ Simpson and Caddyshack?

One had a Bronco pursuit and the other had Chevy Chase.

How many writers for "The Simpsons" does is take to change a lightbulb?

None. They won't admit that it burnt out 15 years ago!

What game does Homer Simpson always lose?

Tic Tac Doh!

What's the difference between Simba and O.J. Simpson?

One is an African lion. The other is a lyin' African (-American).

Alan Dershowitz has defended O.J. Simpson, Jeffrey Epstein, and Donald Trump

The stabber, the nabber, and the grabber

Why did O.J. Simpson want to flee to Alabama?

Everybody there shares the same DNA.

(Mandatory ba dum tss).

Why was OJ Simpson turned down for the role of Thanos?

The glove didn’t fit.

O. J. Simpson

When O. J. Simpson's kids wanted to go out and play, what did he tell them? "Go axe your mother."

What do OJ Simpson and the Pittsburgh Steelers have in common?

They beat up on the Browns.

OJ Simpson, Scott Peterson, and Oscar Pistorius walk into a bar...

...all three order a Bloody Mary.

I think my new Simpsons shirt is a knock-off

It says “don’t halve a cow, man”.

They really butchered the catchphrase.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call Homer Simpson accidently banging his head at the end of a wank?

A Doh! - nut

If someone doesn't like The Simpsons...

Does that make them homerphobic?

Homer Simpson takes his yellow, spiky-haired son to a bar. The bartender pulls up a shotgun and aims it at the boy.

I regret saying this, but the bartender lives up to his name.

What's OJ Simpson's favorite drink?

A Bloody Mary.

What did Nicole Simpson tell Ron Goldman when they we’re having an affair?

You can eat me out but the juice might kill ya

What would the Simpsons do...

If their clothes were itchy and scratchy?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

O.J. Simpson Dies

O.J. Simpson dies and went to hell. When he arrived the Devil met him and began the orientation process. The Devil told O.J. that here in hell you get to decide how you want to spend the rest of eternity. They go to the first door and inside is Josef Stalin, he is being burnt alive over and over. T...

What is O.J. Simpson's favorite drink?

Margarita, but he swears he never wanted tequila.

What is O.J. Simpson's internet address?

Slash slash backslash slash slash escape

How does Homer Simpson say watermelon in French?

Melon D'OH

Apple is developing a product—invented by Bart Simpson—that cleans your vehicle.

The iCaroomba

I invited OJ Simpson to my Thanksgiving dinner.

He's good at carving white meat.

In the Simpsons, what would you call someone who kills Homer's son?

A Bartender.

New England Patriots to bring OJ Simpson on staff...

In an interview, Simpson stated he got the job after responding to a Craigslist ad. He added, "They were looking for a defensive coordinator, and I just though to myself... nobody has more success at building a strong defense than I do."

OJ Simpson started a business after he got parole. I don't who his competitors are...

But it's a cut-throat business.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

During OJ Simpson's First Trial, He and his lawyer are in the bathroom...

they are both standing at the urinals and the lawyer can't help but notice that OJ has Nicole tattooed onto his dick, he leans over and says "Between you and me, I know you killed your wife, so why did you have her name tattooed onto your dick?"

OJ answers "Just because she is dead, doesn't m...

What did they call it when Bart Simpson met Steve Jobs?

iCaramba

I'm a dad. Here's my joke: Why would Bart Simpson never go to a pub?

Because there's a BartEnder there.

Why did Moe finally decide to kill of Homer Simpson's son?

he realized he was a Bartender

Why does O.J. Simpson claim that he's not a murderer?

He's an ex-murderer.

I heard O J Simpson likes to play golf. I think I can beat him.

He's out of practice and I heard he has a terrible slice.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a person with a Simpsons fetish?

Homer-sexual

What are OJ Simpson's favorite keys on a computer?

Return

Home

Slash

Slash

Backslash

Shift

Shift

Shift

Escape

Disney now owns Star Wars, Marvel, Indiana Jones, Disney World and the Simpsons...

If they acquire my parent’s divorce, they will own my entire childhood...

In an interview Barbara Walters asks OJ Simpson if he thinks he will ever be married again...

He says, "I don't know... One of these days, I might take another stab at it."

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