A man walks into a pet store and asks to buy a canary. The owner replies, "I'm fresh out, but I do have a parakeet." The customer insists on a canary, until the shop owner informs him that a parakeet can be made to sound like a canary if one files the beak just so. "But be careful not to file too mu...
Professor and his students
"Just to establish some parameters," said the professor, "Mr. Nichols, what is the opposite of joy?"
"Sadness," said the student.
"And the opposite of depression, Ms. Biggs?"
"And you, sir, how about the opposite of woe?"
One day, at Webster Dictionary's Word Assignment Briefing...
"Nichols," Mr. Lipney, lead word assigner, said, "I'm trusting you to define plethora for next year's edition."
"Thanks Mr. Lipney," Nichols responds, beaming. "It means a lot!"