Why didn't the dough boy take his medication?

His pills were buried.

I accidentally took my cats medication today.

Don't ask me'ow I did it

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My doctor prescribed me a new medication.

It’s called Fukitol. Unfortunately, the pharmacy had none left to give.

In Russia, just saying "thank you" is enough to cure some illnesses even without taking any actual medication.

Scientists are calling it The Spasibo Effect

What happens when you leave your ADHD medication in your Ford Fiesta?

It turns into a Ford Focus.

Apparently 25% of women are on some form of medication for mental illness. 25%! That's horrifying.

It means 75% of them are running around untreated!

Why did the Mexican take anti-anxiety medication?

For Hispanic attacks.

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I mixed up my viagra and depression medication today.

No matter how much I try, everything just keeps getting harder and harder.

I was bored this morning and decided to take my wife's medication just to see what the side effects were

Funny, it didn't make me want to sleep with my best friend...

Me: I'm here for medication to help with my fear of the spice girls

Doctor: we have 3 types so tell me what you want

Me[screams]

What do you call someone who is slowly quitting medication?

A weaner.

My wife and I spend so much money on arthritis medication and weed that we made a whole new bank account just for those two things!

It's a joint account

I just spilled water in a $100 bottle of medication

That's a hard pill to swallow...

Which medication kites behind your boat?

Parasailtamol

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What do you call it when you drop your medication?

Viagra Falls

Did you know that 38% of American women are on medications for being some form of crazy?

This is terrifying because that means that 62% of American women are walking around unmedicated!

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You guys hear about the medication for premature ejaculation?

You can get it with expedited shipping so it should come quickly...

What's the name of the erectile dysfunction medication used in Pokemon?

PP up

Why does Donald Trump need anxiety medication?

To prevent hispanic attacks.

My mother's sister is on heavy duty medication for schizophrenia.

I call her Aunty Psychotic.

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New nurse at an elderly care centre: "Hey, I was checking though Bills medication list and got curious, why would a 90 year old man need viagra while staying here alone?"

Nurse 2: "It stops him rolling out of bed."

My roommate couldn’t remember whether he took his anti anxiety medication or not.

I said, “Are you worried about it?”

The Chinese medic , opens a private clinic.

At the front dor , there was a huge banner saying : " The treatment costs $20 , if you don't get cured , we will give you $100 back"

A lawyer walking by saw the sign and thought it's a good opportunity for him to make an easy $100 , so he walks into the clinic .

- I have lost my tas...

After trying many medications, my uncle learned he is only happy when his wife is miserable

He now only takes auntie depressants.

What medication does a snake take before giving a presentation?

An antihissstamine.

My daughter used to be scared of her anti-depressant medication.

But now look at her - she takes it like a Lexapro.

My dad has Parkinson’s medication.

His medication is labeled “shake well before use”

I just found out that 23% of women are taking psyche medications.. I can't believe it...

That means 77% are walking around untreated.

My submission for a new drug name was rejected by big pharma. I don't know why.

'Dyquickr' is a perfectly good name for a cholesterol lowering medication.

Just got a new medication for my narcolepsy.

I'll let you know how well it

Grampa told me this one!

Two very active seniors (Jacob, age 92, and Mary, age 89), living in The Villages, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way, they pass a drugstore. Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses the man behind the counter, "Are you ...

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I'm fucked. I just dropped my wife's epilepsy medication in the washing machine.

My wife's furious. Her clothes don't fit now.

What medication are ants prescribed to deal with their low moods?

Anty depressants.

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