Providing Jokes - 16 Hilarious Providing Jokes

It’s great that Turkey is providing heavy armoured vehicles to Ukraine.

Everyone loves tanks giving turkey.

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In these tough times Taco Bell is providing more value than ever

Where else can you get gas for $1.19?

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I finally found someone who cares as much as I do about providing sources for every claim.

It was love at first cite.

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North Korea providing updated coronavirus case numbers every 30 minutes today -

8:00AM - 1 case
8:30AM - 0 cases
9:00AM - 1 case
9:30AM - 0 cases
10:00AM - 1 case
10:30AM - 0 cases

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The Chinese government is trying to help working women by providing breast milk couriers...

The couriers take the breast milk from the factory where the mother works to the factory where the baby works.

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In response to the American coin shortage, Canada has committed to providing the U.S. aid

They give us Nickelback

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A king had 10 wild dogs. He used them to torture and kill any minister that misguided him.

A king had 10 wild dogs.
He used them to torture and kill any minister that misguided him.

A minister once gave an opinion which was wrong and which the king didn’t like at all…
So he ordered that the minister to be thrown to the dogs.

The minister said,
"I served you loyall...

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Programming is like sex:

one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The British Army found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus

They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of £1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be.

The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head...

McDonald's is providing a special crutch to all disabled customers for use in their bathrooms, but the POTUS doesn't like it.

It's called the john McCane.

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Little known fact: Michael Caine tried to make it as a pimp, providing prostitutes for rock stars.

It didn't work out, though. One girl was hired to perform oral sex on Jim Morrison and his band mates but she ended up at a festival shagging every musician. Caine reprimanded her severely, telling her "YOU WERE ONLY SUPPOSED TO BLOW THE BLOODY DOORS OFF!"

Heard at Mass today that the government is providing scholarships to students who'd like to attend religious institutions...

Someone Alert the Masses!

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Donald Trump...

-A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter scale hits the Middle East.
-Two million Muslims die and over a million are injured.
-Iraq, Iran and Syria are totally ruined and the governments don't know where to start with providing help to rebuild.
-The rest of the world ...

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England is finally honoring it's longest river entirely in it's border by making repairs to the over 45 navigation locks used for transportation, improving the many drinking water systems abstracting flow from it's discharge into the sea, and providing for wildlife sanctuaries near the coast.

The people will vote on the entire referendum poised to fund the project.

It's called the Bond...the Thames Bond....

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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Can we give a little appreciation to our silent friend

Can we give a little appreciation to our silent friend,

The one who is there at the best and worst times, offering us support and comfort, providing relief to our times of desperation, taking our shit and never complaining no matter how bad it is, and leaving us feeling relaxed and mu...

Landmark

As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system."Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when ...

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