What do you call a flamingo at a red light?

A flaminstop.

Do you know why flamingos lift up one leg when sleeping?

Because if they lifted both legs they'd fall

My wife and I have been arguing recently. I do this really fantastic impression of a flamingo..

But she keeps telling me to stop. Eventually I had to put my foot down

My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo

So I had to put my foot down

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Here's a collection of the best/worst dad jokes I know.

"When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo, I had to put my foot down."

"Why are skeletons always so calm? Because nothing gets under their skin."

"What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care."

"Why can't T rexes clap their hands...

What do you get when you cross a lion with a flamingo?

A visit from an ethics committee and your funding revoked.

I pulled an all-nighter watching a flamingo sleep...

It was outstanding all night.

So this guy at college keeps calling me a flamingo

one of these days I'm going to put my foot down.

I keep on getting peer pressured into playing the flamingo game

But I'm not going to play anymore. Im putting my foot down

A dead flamingo...

would be called a flaminstop

I’m 28, and my parents got really angry at me for acting like a flamingo all the time.

When they told me that, I had to put my foot down.

The pink, plastic birds that are popular lawn ornaments in Florida.....

are they called, "Placebo Flamingos"?

21 One-Liners

1. I hate Russian dolls, they're so full of themselves.

2. I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn't complain.

3. My girlfriend started smoking, so I slowed down and applied Lubricant.



4. Don't let an extra chromosome get you down.

5. I ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A flamingo, a duck, and a lawyer...

Q: What can a flamingo do that a duck can't that a lawyer should?

A: Stick its bill up its ass.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I walked into kindergarten on my first day of school...

I was worried, but nonetheless excited to learn. We began by learning about animals. My teacher asked students what their favorite animal was and when it was my turn I said “Pink Flamingo”

The teacher began screaming and sent me to the principals office. “Why are you here son”, he asked. I to...

I wore a pink t-shirt out the other night and my girlfriend said I looked like a Flamingo..

So I had to put my foot down.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

FACE DOWN ASS UP. THAT'S THE WAY...

Flamingos hangout sometimes, not really sure why.

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.