Albert Einstein says “If I can’t answer your question, i’ll give you a million dollars. If you can’t answer my question, you have to give me five dollars.”
Homer says “ok”
Albert Einstein says “I’ll start: What is the capital of France?”
Homer says “lol idk”
Homer gives E...
Doctor, doctor, I think my hearing's going!
What are the symptoms?
Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa and Maggie
What game does Homer Simpson always lose?
Tic Tac Doh!
I went to the doctor with hearing problems
He said "Can you describe the symptoms?"
I said "Homer is fat, Lisa is smart and Marge has blue hair"
Why did the Italian Homer Simpson buy his wife cheese?
Because it was Formaggio
A baseball manager calls up a Chinese rookie from the minor leagues
The player shows up before his first game and goes to take batting practice. The manager sees him walking to the batter's box with a frying pan sitting on his head. He says "You can't wear a frying pan in the batter's box, son. You need a helmet."
The player responds: "This is my lucky frying...
What was Homer's favorite letter?
If Homer Simpson goes to see the Scottish Play, what beer does he drink at the Globe?
Why did Homer think Marge was cheating on him?
Because she said she had just done Apu in the toilet
How does Homer Simpson say watermelon in French?
Why did Moe finally decide to kill of Homer Simpson's son?
he realized he was a Bartender
What is Homer Simpsons favorite bread?
If someone sends you a link to download the Homer's Iliad, don't download it...
It's full of trojans!!
I visited the doctors yesterday
Because I've had trouble with my hearing. I sat down in front of the doctor and he asked what the matter was. I explained I had trouble hearing the past few days, he asked if I could explain the symptoms. I said "Marge has blue hair and homers fat"
Things need to know about me
A. Bad at grammar
B. Bad at titles
H. Don't know the alphabet
7. Don't know number line
237. Too ambitious
(7) Easily distracted
What does Monsieur Homer say after spilling water on himself?
I realize the writer of the Iliad and the Odyssey was better than me every time I enter my house
I am home, but he was Homer.
Doctor: I understand you're experiencing hearing difficulties. Please describe the symptoms.
Patient: Well, Homer is fat and Marge has blue hair.
^(Posted on behalf of /r/ScottishPeopleTwitter's comment section)
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall?
That same guy in your pool? Bob
Same guy in your hot tub? Stew
Sitting under your car that's missing a wheel? Jack
Same guy on your porch? Matt
Same guy getting hit with a baseball bat? Homer
Same guy lying in a pile of leaves? Russel
What do you...
So my friend had some issue with his hearing....
My friend was having some issues with his hearing, so he booked a doctor's appointment. The doctor checked him over and had a look in his ears. The doctor said "okay. So, describe the symptoms". My friend said "well, there's homer. He's the dad. And there's Marge, she's got big blue hair..."
Hard of Hearing
I went to the Doctors yesterday as my ears were a bit blocked and I couldn't hear too well. The Doctor asked if I could describe the symptoms, I told him the Father is called Homer and is fat and his wife is called Marge with big blue hair.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
What do you call a person with a Simpsons fetish?
An ear doctor gets a phone call from a patient and asks him to describe the symptoms.
He says, "they're yellow, Homer's fat and Marge has blue hair".