Roses are red, violets are green..

If you were on acid, you would know what I mean.

Roses are brown, violets are grey

I just found out I'm colorblind today.

>!It's becoming a real problem at the traffic lights I'm afraid to say!<

Roses are red, Violets are blue

Sunflowers are yellow

I bet you were expecting something romantic but no, this us just gardening facts

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My mom doesnt want me to play videogames because she said it makes you violet

Well I don't believe her bullshit. I'm light brown.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. If you don’t like Harry Potter puns,

Something is Siriusly Ron with you.

Roses are red, violets are blue

Never gonna run around and *desert youuu*

Roses are red, violets are blue, Yo Mama so fat

But she still loves you!

Roses are red, Violets are glorious

Don't sneak up on,
Oscar Pristorius

A Priest was reciting a poem, "Roses are red violets are blue".

My girlfriend is 9 I'm 62.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red

The tape around my house is yellow

Roses are red, Violets are blue

If people say you're beautiful they're lying to you

Roses are red, violets are blue(ish)

Have a merry Christmas, unless you are Jewish.

A beautiful poem indeed

Roses are red
Violet's are blue
I stopped using blizzard
And you should too

Roses are gray

Violets are gray

I'm color blind

And not very good at poetry

Roses Are Red

Violets are blue.
Today is my cake day.
Can I get an upvote or two?

How did the polish guy break his arm raking leaves.

He fell out of the tree!

Roses aren’t red..

Violets are gray..
Ever since i looked at the at the sun, i have not been having a great day.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman visits a florist to get some flowers for her mother.

As she's perusing, she notices the most gorgeous rose she's ever seen sitting next to the cashier, and inquires about it.

"Oh, sorry," the cashier replies. "That one's not for sale. You see, I got that as a gift from a fellow florist for hooking him up with a woman I met yesterday."

"...

Roses are brown, violets are grey

I just found out I'm colorblind today.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roses are red,violets are blue

If you were expecting a generic meme fuck you

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Roses are red, Violets are blue

Hitler blew an 11 country lead during World War 2

Programming joke

Roses are Red
Violets are Blue

Unexpected Indent

In line 22

Roses are red, violets are blue...

Let's dispel once and for all with this fiction that Barack Obama doesn't know what he's doing. He knows EXACTLY what he's doing. Barack Obama is undertaking a systematic effort to change this country, to make America more like the rest of the world.

That's why he passed Obamacare and th...

Old ladies' knickers

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Phyllis's are green.

A man had 2 daughters and a son. One day all three of them wanted to ask how Dad had named them.

The first daughter asked, "Daddy why did you name me Rose?"

The father responded, "When you were born, a rose pedal floated through the window and landed on your head."

The second daughter asked, "Daddy, why did you name me Violet?"

The father responded, "When you were born, the...

A little boy asked his father…

A little boy asked his father

“Daddy, why is my sisters name Rose?”

“Because your mummy loves roses”

“And why is my other sister’s name Violet?”

“Because mummy loves violets, too”

“And what about me?”

“I’ll tell you when you’re older, Anal”

Roses are red, violets are blue.

When it comes to flower colours, the person who made this has no clue.

Roses are red, violets ain't black

Your mamma's chest, is as flat as her back.

Roses are red violets are blue

Roses are red and Violets are blue

Sugar is sweet and so are you

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead

The sugar bowls empty and so is your head

Roses are red, violets are violet

Start getting it right, or I'm getting violent.

Roses Are Read, Violets are Blue

I thought I was ugly,

Until I met you.

Three girls are in the back seat, their parents are in the front

Girl 1: Mom, why did you name me Violet?

Mother: Oh Violet, your grandmother dropped a violet on your head the day you were born.

Girl 2: Mom, why did you name me Daisy?

Mother: When we were walking out of the hospital the nurse put a daisy on your head.

Girl 3: Jwoandb...

A blind woman goes out shopping...

A blind old woman goes out shopping, and instead of walking into the local electronics store, she ends up walking into the pet store.

She says to the manager at the desk: "Hello there. I was wondering, do you sell infrared grillers?"

The manager says back: "I'm afraid we don't have tho...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why didn't willy wonka choose violet to take over the factory?

Because that would require a woman to break the glass ceiling.

This is a good rhyme/quote for your ex

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have 5 fingers, the 3rd ones for you.

Roses are red

Violets are bluish
If it wasn’t for Christmas
We’d all be Jewish


I don’t know if this has been posted before but I heard it from one of my uncles.

What does one say to an anti-vaxx kid?

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
omae wa
mou shindeiru.

A mother was sitting with her three children, when one had a question.

A mother was sitting with her 2 girls and 1 boy. The first girl turns to her mother, and asks, with a soft, sweet voice and a smile, "Mom, why is my name violet?".

Her mother answers, "Well, dear when I was in hospital with you your father brought me a bouquet of violets, and when I was tryin...

A short poem about women's underwear...

> Rose's are red,
Violet's are blue,
>!Heather's are green.!<
~Lee Mack


EDIT: added spoiler for 37% better delivery.

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