Violet Jokes

Your Valentine's steak will cost $85

Violets are blue...

WOLOLOLOLOOO!!!!

Ah shucks now the roses are blue too!

if you aren’t red, you get shot in the head.”

\-Stalin 1946

When it comes to flower colours, the person who made this has no clue.

Everything’s black; I’m blind

If you were on acid, you would know what I mean.

When I listen to rock music.
My neighbours do too.

She woke up and chose violets.

Because they're violetors.

I have an art degree...you want fries with that?

Bushes are red,
Trees are red,
My garden is on fire.

Never sneak up,
On oscar pistorious

If it weren't for Christmas, we'd all be Jewish.

I just found out I'm colorblind today.

>!It's becoming a real problem at the traffic lights I'm afraid to say!<

Let's dispel once and for all with this fiction that Barack Obama doesn't know what he's doing. He knows EXACTLY what he's doing. Barack Obama is undertaking a systematic effort to change this country, to make America more like the rest of the world.

That's why he passed Obamacare and th... read more

I'm having a stroke
call a anbulous... ambivalence... weewee wagon pls

Jeffery Epstein did not kill himself

Could you use African violets instead?"

Replied the customer sadly, "No, it was geraniums my wife told me to water while she was gone."

The tape around my house is yellow

Something is Siriusly Ron with you.

I sneezed on the anti-vaxxer and gave him the flu.

Update: He died and know they are gonna sue.

My girlfriend is 9 I'm 62.

If people say you're beautiful they're lying to you

Sunflowers are yellow

I bet you were expecting something romantic but no, this us just gardening facts

Roses are red and Violets are blue

Sugar is sweet and so are you

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead

The sugar bowls empty and so is your head

Have a merry Christmas, unless you are Jewish.

Your mamma's chest, is as flat as her back.

I thought I was ugly,

Until I met you.

There is a lady called Mary who has 3 children: Violet, Rose and Brick.

So Violet goes to her and asks: “Mom, why am I called Violet?”

And Mary responds: “Because when you were born, a violet fell on your head”

Then Rose comes and asks: “Mom, why am I called Rose?”

And Ma... read more