There was a man in Jamaica who had only one testicle.
Jamaicans being Jamaicans gave him the street name "Onestone".
He hated that name and asked everyone not to call him Onestone.
After years and years of torment, Onestone finally cracked and said, "If anyone calls me Onestone again I will kill them!" The word got around and nobody ca...
I was kidnapped by mad scientist who experimented on me, replacing my limbs with animal ones.
If I ever see him again I'll tear him apart with my bear hands.
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
One day there were these two guys, John and Bill, and they that decide to go out for coffee together...
So John goes to Bill's house to pick him up. Bill gets in the car and they drive off. As they're heading down the road, the light begins to change yellow, and then red. John continues at the same speed and goes through the red light. "Hey man," says Bill, "You just ran that red light!" "I know......
Why are Americans so stupid?
Because they shoot all the ones who go to school
EDIT: I love jokes and comedic freedom... but I AM SO SORRY ABOUT THIS ONE LOL
EDIT 2: Thanks for letting me share the pain of this one with you, internet. And I’m not European (where are ppl getting this lol), I am also 🇺🇸
An old man walks up to the counter of a pawn shop holding an old, weathered guitar
"I'd like your expert opinion on this guitar, how much do you think it's worth?" asks the old man.
The pawn broker looks it up and down. "Well, I can tell right now that there's a little warping in the neck, the lacquer is faded and there's scratches and dents all over it. It's an old, well-p...
There once was a boy named George Gunderson who did not do very well in school. His classmates ridiculed him every day, as did his teacher, Mrs. Jones. George couldn't stand it, and always came home crying to his parents.
One day, Mr. and Mrs. Gunderson decided to come to the school early to give Mrs. Jones a piece of her mind. The second the door opened to let the kids outside, Mr. and Mrs. Gunderson peeked inside to hear Mrs. Jones screaming at George. "George Gunderson, you are the dumbest kid in the world!" ...