A Glaswegian has the munchies and wanders into a bakery

and asks the baker "Is that a doughnut or a meringue?"

"No sir, you're perfectly correct, it's a doughnut".


(I don't expect many folk to get this btw)

"Hmm," I said to the fishmonger, examining the selection. "I've got the munchies, I will eat any of these."

"Smoked trout?" he asked.

"No," I replied. "Just a little bit of weed."

Who would DO this??

I swear..only in Waihi!!
I walked into the BP to get some munchies.. As I was going through the forecourt, I noticed these 2 police officers watching a woman who was smoking while pumping her petrol. I saw her and thought, is this lady stupid, crazy or both, especially with the cop RIGHT there ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So a crow is in the woods...

Perched on top of a tree and is relaxing smoking weed. A lizard nearby smells it an looks up and sees this crow way up on the top of this tree. So the lizard asks "hey! Wanna share?"
"Sure I don't mind, come on up"replies the crow.
"Great but let me go get some water first, one sec." Said the...

Red Neck Computer Dictionary

* LOG ON: Makin’ a woodstove hot.
* LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood.
* MONITOR: Keepin’ an eye on the wood stove.
* DOWNLOAD: Gittin’ the farwood off the truck.
* MEGA HERTZ: When you’re not keerfull gittin’ the farwood.
* FLOPPY DISC: Whutcha git from trying to tote too much far...

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.