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Doobie Jokes

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Why does Shaggy always let Scooby roll their joints?

Because shaggys joints don't always turn out good but Scooby's doobies do

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One day a guy dies...

...and finds himself in hell. Walking around, he runs into the devil.

Devil: Why are you so sad?

Guy: Why do you think? I'm in hell.

Devil: Hell's not so bad. We actually have a lot of fun down here. You a drinkin' man?

Guy: Sure, I love to drink.

Devil: Well ...

What do you get when you mix scoobie snacks and weed

A Scoobie Doobie

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Fred, Velma, and Daphne don't smoke weed

But Shaggy and Scooby doobie do

A mondegreen courtesy of a four year old

I was listening to pop, folk and soft rock music from the 60s and 70s the other day, artists like Cat Stevens, Simon and Garfunkel, and the Doobie Brothers. My granddaughter came in the room, climbed up on the bed, and cuddled up next to me.

She was listening very intently to the lyrics of on...

Why are pot smokers always asking "What?"

They're doobie-ous.

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What's the difference between old age and someone that designs cannabis bracelets?

With one you'll find the doobie bangles.

With the other you'll find the booby dangles.

What do middle eastern people smoke?

An Abu Doobie

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Three guys die and go to hell [LONG]

Satan meets them for orientation. He asks the first one "What was your favorite sin in life?" He replies "It would have to be booze, I stayed drunk all the time." So Satan leads him to a door and opens it to reveal a giant room containing acres of every type of alcoholic drink imaginable; beers, ...

The Stoned Koala and Lizard

A koala is sitting up a gumtree smoking a joint when a little lizard walks past, looks up and says:

"Hey Koala!
What are you doing?"

The koala says: "Smoking a joint."
"Come up and have some."

So the little lizard climbs up, sits next to the koala
and they enjoy a large...

A lady walks into a perfumery and asks for the perfumer for his finest fragrance.

"Doobie woobie blue bop", says the perfumer.

Confused she looks around and notices that all of the bottles on the shelves are empty. "Do you keep them in the back?" she asks

"Flim flam flibidy blam", says the perfumer.

The lady sniffs the air, then looks at him strangely and as...

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Shaggy's spliffs don't get me very high...

...but Scooby's doobies do

Euclid as a teenager

Back in his youthful days, Euclid was sitting around drawing circles with other nerdy Greek kids like he always would. One day, one of the edgier kiddos brought along some weed.

"I conjecture that if we light it up, we will be as high as Mount Olympus!"

"We must make sure to di...

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So a lizard is walking in the jungle

And he hears someone calling him from a tree.

"Hey Lizard, come smoke a joint with me!" says a monkey up high in a tree. The lizard says "fuck yeah!" and climbs up to hit the doobie.

They're all nice and baked when the lizard gets cotton mouth. "Im gonna go down to the lake for a drin...

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