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Why don't Italian appetizers remember you?

'Cause they Foccacia!

What do you call people who take all the appetizers?

Hor d'oeuvres.

There should be a show where cops sit around a restaurant table order appetizers and tell cop stories.

The could call it "Law and hors d'oeuvres"

We went for Indian food on our first date so I tried to get conversation going at the table by ordering appetizers...

Turns out that was a naan starter

Snails for Dinner

This guy and his wife lived somewhere where it was fairly common to go out and gather snails and cook them as a delicacy.

So they were having a dinner party, and the wife asks the husband to go get some snails to serve as appetizers. He takes a bucket and goes out and sets about his task. ...

A couple are dining at a German restaurant...

A couple are dining at a German restaurant, and so far it has been awful. The appetizers were cold, the beer was warm, and the main course has been in preparation for over two hours.

They call over their waitress to complain about the appetizers and the beer, and to ask where their entrees a...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pete met a French girl

Pete grown up in a faraway suburb, however, he was lucky, he got hired by a big company in the downtown area.

On his first day to work, he met a French exchange colleague, he instantly had a crush on her. But he kept silent all the time about it.

It was the Bastille Day, the Fr...

Before celebrating a baptism, the deacon approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you sure you’re prepared for it?”

"I think so,” the man replied. “My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for our guests.”
“I don’t mean that,” the deacon replied. “I mean, are you prepared spiritually?”
“Oh sure,” came the reply. “I’ve got a keg of beer and a case of whi...

A man and a woman are out to dinner at a fancy restaurant

Right around when the appetizers they hear a loud sound like galloping hooves on the marble floor.

They both turn to see a half-man half-horse jogging around the restaurant

Eventually it stops running and stands at attention.

They stare

A loud trumpet sounds and the Head ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Unfortunate

This guy lives in Westchester, NY and goes to school at Ithaca College. For two years, he has wanted to ask a certain girl (who is also from Westchester and also goes to Ithaca) out on a date, but has never had the courage.

Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and musters up...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man receives an invitation to the execution of a cannibalistic serial killer

Because of the nature of his crime, the judge had decided that his punishment was to be cooked and eaten by randomly selected members of the public. Not willing to pass up such a unique opportunity, the man decided to go and enjoy himself.

Upon his arrival, he was led to one of many comfy lea...

The Sheikh trying to be smart.

Naseeruddin Shah was one of the few courtiers that the Sheikh had for actual advice rather than to please his father's acquaintances.


As such, he tested Naseeruddin a lot when it came to matters of patience and understanding, hoping to know where he put the line between displeasing the H...

So a man is on a cruise...

That's sponsored by the Democratic party for a fundraiser. He's walking around enjoying his time when he comes across a group of people watching a game of limbo.
He sees that the crowd is really enjoying watching the game, so he hops in.
When it's his turn to go under, he ducks waaayy under ...

There was a young man who was obsessed with tractors as long as he could remember...

When the “World’s Biggest Tractor” was going to be displayed at the county fair, he knew he had to go. He saved up some money, drove to the event, and was first in line to see the tractor up close.

As he was examining the wheels, the tractor ended up lurching forward, pinning his legs as he t...

Three little pigs walk into a restaurant

They are seated at a table. After a few minutes to look at the menu, they decide to start with some appetizers. The waiter asks the pigs what they will have.

"I'll start with some chips and salsa," the first pig replies.
"I will begin with some mozzarella sticks," the second pig says. "Wat...

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