What did Vader's dog say to Luke's dog

Join the bark side

Where does Luke Skywalker like to vacation?

The HimaLeah

Yoda and Luke are walking through the swamp. Part of their usual training course involves shimmying along a cliff ledge, but today, there's a long break in the ledge they can't cross.

"Something for this, I have." Yoda says.

He reaches into his bag and takes out a bunch of regular dinner table forks and a roll of duct tape. He tapes several forks together to make a bridge and lays it down, allowing the two of them to get across.

When they get back to Yoda's hovel, t...

Chewie is short for Chewbacca

Chewie is short for Chewbacca

Ani is short for Anakin Skywalker

What is Luke short for?


A stormtrooper

Before Luke Skywalker died, he saw his mother and father before him...

His mom asked why he had blonde hair when he was young, as neither she nor anikin had it.

Luke fell silent, but before he could answer, his father answered " he was going through a rebel phase, dear"

How did Darth Vader know what Luke bought him for Christmas?

He felt his ...presence

Luke Skywalker and Obi Wan are out at a Chinese restaurant and Luke is really battling trying to use the chopsticks to feed his face. ​

After a while Obi Wan turns to him and says "use the forks luke".

What did Obi-wan say to Luke when he saw him struggling with the chopsticks?

Use the fork, Luke.

My son Luke loves the fact he's named after a Star Wars character

My daughter Chewbacca, not so much

Why was Luke under the Christmas tree?

He wanted to feel Obi Wan's presents.

Darth Vader always knew what Luke and Leia got him for Christmas, stating:

“I’ve felt your presents”

For my cake day this year I want to share the love I have of Star Wars and dad jokes so here is one of my favorites: Where did Luke get this cybernetic hand from?

The second hand store.

What do you get when you cross Harry Potter with Luke Skywalker?

Scar Wars.

My pastor asked me to name the four Gospels, but I could only remember Matthew, Luke, and John.

I missed the Mark.

Where did Luke Skywalker go shopping between Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi?

Second Hand Store

What is the average internal body temperature of a Tauntaun

Luke Warm

My son Luke loves that we chose Star Wars characters as inspiration when naming my kids.

However, his sister Chewbacca and his brother Boba Fett are less amused.

What did Han tell Luke about his father?

Luke, I’m not your father, but your sister calls me daddy.

Why were luke and leia Jedi’s?

Because they were children of di vorce

Who is Luke?

And why is he warming my water?

What did Luke say to Han and Leia when they split up?

May divorce be with you.

Was watching Star Wars with my daughter. She asked why Luke was climbing inside a Tauntaun, I said to keep warm.

She asked how warm is it inside. I replied Lukewarm.

What’s Luke Skywalker’s favorite car brand ?

It’s ToYoda.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why was Han Solo

so suspicious when he put his penis inside Princess Leia for the first time?

...it was Luke warm..

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are engaged in a lightsaber duel, when Vader whispers....

"Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas"

Luke ignored him and continued to to fight.

But he whispers again "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas"

Luke stops fighting and says "Ok, what are you going on about?"

"I have felt your presence"

Luke:”Yoda, are we heading the right direction?”

Yoda:”Off course, we are.”

What did yoda say to oni wan, Luke, and ray?

You guys down for a forcesome?

Why was Luke skywalker late to work?

He had to take an R2Detour.

Obi Wan Kenobi decides he wants a change of pace so decides to put his skills into becoming a marriage councillor.

One day a familiar face pops in, Luke Skywalker. Luke sits down an immediately bursts into tears as his new wife is absolutely awful. For three hours Luke talks, almost non stop, about all the horrible things she does to him - putting green milk in his cereal, signing him up to the Jar-Jar fanclub, ...

A teacher worked for an affluential school

She asks her little students to bring something from their family for a show and tell. The next day, she calls little Mary to show what she had brought.

"I've brought a scalpel, teacher. It's my mom's, she is a heart surgeon"

"Oh, how marvelous! And you, Luke, what do you have there?"<...

What’s Luke Skywalkers favorite type of retirement account?

A Hoth IRA

How did Luke Skywalker get around the forest moon of Endor?

Ewoked.

What did Darth Vader say when he sensed Luke for the first time?

"I have a dad feeling about this."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A teacher has students introduce themselves on the first day of school.

Teacher: Good morning, class. I’ll call on you, one by one, and you can tell us your name and maybe what your dad or your mom does for a living. You, please, over at this end.

Small Boy: My name is Emmett and my dad is a mechanic.

Teacher: A mechanic! Thank you, Emmett. Next?

S...

I’ve been watching the Star Wars movies, and I realized something

It’s not that big of a shock that Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father.


I mean, they have the same no’s.

What do you call it when you have to give money back to Luke Wilson's brother?

*Owin'* Wilson

Knock knock

Who’s there?

Luke.

Luke who?

Luke through the keyhole and you’ll see.

What is Luke Skywalker's favorite candy?

Blue milk duds.

Two of my married (to each other) geeky friends enjoy couples-themed cosplay.

Every convention I see them in different outfits. One year it was Doctor McCoy and Nurse Chapel. The next they went as Luke and Leia. Then they went as the 4th Doctor and Sarah Jane Smith.

Well, the lady had a baby after that. The next time I saw them, He was dressed up as Number 6 Patr...

What did Darth Vader say under the tree?

Luke... I feel your presents...

My sister just told this to me, and I genuinely laughed at it so I thought it belonged here!

C3PO, Luke Skywalker, and Han Solo are taken prisoner on an alien planet

The Millennium Falcon had to make an emergency stop on an uncharted planet. The trio is greeted by a hostile alien race and placed in a horrendous prison.

After some time they are taken in the night to some kind of tribunal where they are told that all outsiders are regarded as evil demons an...

What do you call Luke, Leia, Han, Chewie and the rest of The Rebellion at the beginning of a rugby match?

Rebel Scrum

Yoda: Dark it is, the other side

Luke: Shut up and eat your toast.

Why did Obi-Wan not appear for Luke’s award ceremony at the end of a New Hope?

He was there in spirit.

What did Darth Vader say when he saw his old droid choosing Luke over him?

"E tu, D2?"

I like to tease my friend Luke

One time I gave him 2 forks when he asked for a spoon to have his cereal with. He said "Can I have a spoon?" I said "Luke, use the forks".

Why didn't Luke Skywalker's marriages ever last?

He wanted to follow Obi-Wan's advice: "Use divorce, Luke"

What do you call Luke Skywalker's futuristic frying pan?

An e-wok

Yoda and Luke Skywalker are together in a ship when Luke asks...

Luke: are we on track?

Yoda: off course, we are.

One day, Obi-Wan and Luke visit a Chinese restaurant.

Obi-Wan is eating normally, but Luke is having so much trouble with the chopsticks he's spilling the food all over the table.

Eventually, Obi-Wan becomes angry and says, "Use the forks, Luke!"

What dressing does Luke Skywalker put on a porg before eating it?

Skywalker Ranch

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are engaged in a light saber battle...

...when suddenly Darth grabs Luke by the tunic and pulls him close. "Luke, I know what you are getting for Christmas", he says to the young Jedi.

"How? How could you possibly know what I am getting for Christmas?" Luke says skeptically.

Vader replies: "Because, I felt your presents."

How did Luke make it across Endor after he crashed his speeder bike?

Ewoked.

Why did Luke Skywalker never marry?

Because he was busy riding Solo

How does Luke Skywalker clean his pool ? [OC]

With midichlorian

Luke and Yoda are training on Dagobah

Luke and Yoda are training on Dagobah. Suddenly, part of the ledge in front of them falls off. "Oh no, what do we do, master?" asked Luke. "Worry not" replied Yoda. Yoda takes out a giant 6-foot fork, lays it across the gap in the ledge, and they use it as a bridge.

Soon enough, they come to ...

Luke wanted to find love

But he looked in Alderaan places.

Luke Skywalker and Yoda are hopelessly lost on their journey...

Luke: Yoda, we've been walking for hours! Are you sure that we're going the right way?

Yoda: For the tenth time, told you, I have! Off course, we are!

An old Jedi master named Ben stole Luke Skywalker’s last pastry.

Angrily, Luke shouted after him as he ran away, “Hey, you Owe Me One Canoli!”

My friend decided to get a face tattoo of her favourite Star Wars character.

You should have seen the Luke on her face.

Luke Skywalker went to the Jedi temple

Obi-Wan Kenobi's force ghost materialized and noticed that Master Luke seemed perturbed, and so asked him what the matter was.

Luke replied "Ben, my life outside the Jedi Order is in shambles. It's mainly my marriage. It started off great, but something's changed in recent times. Drastical...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A girl’s invited to his boyfriend’s family dinner. But she made a mistake of eating a jumbo can of beans.

When she is on her way, she feels the need to fart, but she figures she can wait until she gets to his house.

When she arrives, his parents are so happy to meet her. His parents immediately invite her to the dining table. Since dinner is almost ready, she feels bad to step out. She figures s...

"Update the force, Luke"

Adobe Wan Kenobi

I guess you could say Luke Skywalker single-handedly defeated the empire.

I told this joke to someone in a dream, and when I woke up I realized it was actually funny.

"Remember, Luke, a Jedi always has doubts about something. Only a Sith can be 100% sure about everything."

"Dad, are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

This joke is translated from georgian.

A teacher is having a lesson about good deeds.
She teaches the kids to help people cross the road and such.

The next day a group of kids go over to the teacher and one of them says:

Hey teacher, Me, Zach, Andy, George, Tom, John and Luke helped a lady to cross the street.

The...

What did Darth Vader tell Luke?

Luke, I am your [Unlock Content for 20000 Credits].

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Luke cage

In marvels luke cage everyone thinks that luke has super powers because he's bullet proof.

But bullet proof black people isn't a super power it's straight up evolution.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Luke Skywalker and a black man?

Luke Skywalker eventually finds out who his father is.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

a list of puns!

Here's a list of puns I've been collecting:

How do you throw a space party? You planet.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

Nope. Unintended.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.

A scarecrow says,...

So Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are locked in their final showdown...

...light sabers are flashing, the balance is delicate, but suddenly Luke knocks Darth's weapon away. As it's skidding out of reach, Luke moves in for the final blow. Quickly, Darth holds up a hand and says "Luke, wait! I need to tell you something". Luke, sensing a trap, asks why he should do such a...

What does Anakin do when Luke doesn't eat his vegetables?

He force-feeds him

Some priests told their victims it was okay to touch them because it said so in the bible.

That is, according to John,10, Luke, 8, and Matthew, 12.

Luke Skywalker goes to eat at an Italian restaurant, finishes dinner then orders desert.

Only one canoli.

After Luke Skywalker found out Princess Leia was his sister...

He became best friends with hand solo.

One day Darth Vadar said to Luke Skywalker

I know what you got for your birthday.
Luke looked at him and said "how do you know that?"
Darth Vadar replied "I can feel your presents".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Luke 14:10

A priest and a nun are driving in a car towards a monastery, priest behind the wheel.

Approaching the red light, priest places gently his hand on the nuns knee to which the nun looks at him and says:
-- Father, remember "Luke 14:10"
Priest apologies, removes his hand and keeps on drivi...

Luke chided Han for blaming Chewbacca when everyone got caught in the tree net on the forest moon of Endor.

But let's be honest: it *was* a Wookie mistake.

Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant.

Luke and Obi-Wan walk into a Chinese restaurant. Ten minutes into the meal, Luke’s still having trouble with the chopsticks, dropping food everywhere. Obi-Wan finally snaps, “Use the forks, Luke.”

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