Luke Skywalker Jokes - 45 Hilarious Luke Skywalker Jokes

Why didn't Luke Skywalker want to visit the Death Star?

Because he didn't want death.

(My 5 year old made this joke up and he was very proud of himself. I told him I'd post it here for cheap and easy karma)

How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker was getting for Christmas?

He felt his presents.

Where does Luke Skywalker like to vacation?

The HimaLeah

Luke Skywalker: "You smoke Han Solo?"

Han Solo: "No."

Luke Skywalker: "What about Chewbacca?"

Han Solo: "No, I don't do that either."

Yoda and Luke Skywalker are together in a ship when Luke asks...

Luke: are we on track?

Yoda: off course, we are.

What did the lunch lady say to Luke Skywalker?

Use the FORKS, Luke!

What is Luke Skywalker's least favorite store

The second hand store

Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker are about to engage in a lightsaber duel, when Vader suddenly whispers, "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas."

Luke ignores him and continues to prepare for the fight.

Vader whispers again, "Luke, I know what you're getting for Christmas."

Luke lowers from his attack stance and asks, "Ok, what are you going on about?"

Vader says, "I can sense your presents."

Luke Skywalker and Yoda are hopelessly lost on their journey...

Luke: Yoda, we've been walking for hours! Are you sure that we're going the right way?

Yoda: For the tenth time, told you, I have! Off course, we are!

Why was Luke Skywalker called the last Jedi ?

Because he was the Obi Wan left

What did Han Solo say when he saw Luke Skywalker eating without cutlery?

“Use the Forks, Luke”

What’s Luke Skywalker’s favorite car brand ?

It’s ToYoda.

How did Luke Skywalker get around the forest moon of Endor?

Ewoked.

Before Luke Skywalker died, he saw his mother and father before him...

His mom asked why he had blonde hair when he was young, as neither she nor anikin had it.

Luke fell silent, but before he could answer, his father answered " he was going through a rebel phase, dear"

What do you get when you cross Harry Potter with Luke Skywalker?

Scar Wars.

Why didn't Luke Skywalker's marriages ever last?

He wanted to follow Obi-Wan's advice: "Use divorce, Luke"

Why was Luke skywalker late to work?

He had to take an R2Detour.

A former practitioner in sleeves and tramp stamps, Luke Skywalker had given up his artistry to save the galaxy

But when he was finished, he returned to Tatooine

Luke Skywalker took a hissy fit in a restaurant. Try as he might, using Chopsticks was seemingly far beyond his fledgling Jedi skills. Embarrassing himself and causing a bit of a scene, Ben Kenobi leans over and offers some wisdom:

"Use the forks, Luke!"

Why did Luke Skywalker never marry?

Because he was busy riding Solo

It's ironic the character's name is Luke Skywalker...

He never walks on any skies, but he does spend the majority of the series "hand solo."

How come does Luke Skywalker does not have a girlfriend?

He was looking for love in Alderaan places

Where did Luke Skywalker go shopping between Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi?

Second Hand Store

Luke Skywalker went to the Jedi temple

Obi-Wan Kenobi's force ghost materialized and noticed that Master Luke seemed perturbed, and so asked him what the matter was.

Luke replied "Ben, my life outside the Jedi Order is in shambles. It's mainly my marriage. It started off great, but something's changed in recent times. Drastical...

Luke Skywalker and Obi Wan are out at a Chinese restaurant and Luke is really battling trying to use the chopsticks to feed his face.

After a while Obi Wan turns to him and says "use the forks luke".

An old Jedi master named Ben stole Luke Skywalker’s last pastry.

Angrily, Luke shouted after him as he ran away, “Hey, you Owe Me One Canoli!”

One day Darth Vadar said to Luke Skywalker

I know what you got for your birthday.
Luke looked at him and said "how do you know that?"
Darth Vadar replied "I can feel your presents".

my favorite star wars character is luke skywalker

hand down

I guess you could say Luke Skywalker single-handedly defeated the empire.

I told this joke to someone in a dream, and when I woke up I realized it was actually funny.

C3PO, Luke Skywalker, and Han Solo are taken prisoner on an alien planet

The Millennium Falcon had to make an emergency stop on an uncharted planet. The trio is greeted by a hostile alien race and placed in a horrendous prison.

After some time they are taken in the night to some kind of tribunal where they are told that all outsiders are regarded as evil demons an...

What dressing does Luke Skywalker put on a porg before eating it?

Skywalker Ranch

So Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are locked in their final showdown...

...light sabers are flashing, the balance is delicate, but suddenly Luke knocks Darth's weapon away. As it's skidding out of reach, Luke moves in for the final blow. Quickly, Darth holds up a hand and says "Luke, wait! I need to tell you something". Luke, sensing a trap, asks why he should do such a...

After Luke Skywalker found out Princess Leia was his sister...

He became best friends with hand solo.

Luke Skywalker and R2-D2 go to a Chinese restaurant for dinner...

.... Luke scans the menu and sees his favorite egg fried rice so he say to R2-D2 “Oh I’m definitely ordering that!” Sure enough when the waiter comes along he orders the egg fried rice and a few other side dishes.

Now Luke is absolutely starving, so as soon as his meal arrives he picks up the...

Luke Skywalker goes to eat at an Italian restaurant, finishes dinner then orders desert.

Only one canoli.

Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are having a lightsaber battle

And Luke is losing. He knows that unless he does something soon, he's going to die. So he thinks fast and says to Darth Vader, "Darth Vader, I know what you're getting for Christmas."

Darth Vader hesitates for a moment and says "How do you know?"

And Luke responds "I felt your presen...

Why was Luke Skywalker banned from all the local pubs...

He used excessive force

My girlfriend and I finally decided to try out role-play in the bedroom. I dressed up like Luke Skywalker

And she pretended to be a dead fish.

My friends and I went drinking last weekend

This wasn't casual drinking, we got absolutely wasted. I still have a little bit of a headache from the hangover. I don't remember a lot from the night, but I do remember multiple dares, and a bet about who could drink the most without blacking out. I don't remember what placement I got, but I do kn...

Obi Wan Kenobi decides he wants a change of pace so decides to put his skills into becoming a marriage councillor.

One day a familiar face pops in, Luke Skywalker. Luke sits down an immediately bursts into tears as his new wife is absolutely awful. For three hours Luke talks, almost non stop, about all the horrible things she does to him - putting green milk in his cereal, signing him up to the Jar-Jar fanclub, ...

I’ve been watching the Star Wars movies, and I realized something

It’s not that big of a shock that Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker’s father.

I mean, they have the same no’s.

A long, long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

There lived a Jedi known as Luke Skywalker. Luke was a mighty warrior, and quite the ladies man. His use of his 'lightsaber' attracted the eye of the beautiful Princess Leah. Luke wooed the Princess, and they fell in love. All was great in the world, until Han Solo, the ex lover of Princess Leah, fi...

My sister is trying to become an impressionist but she’s really bad at it.

I asked her to do a Luke Skywalker impersonation and she just said “NOOOOOOO THATS IMPOSSIPLE!”

In the vein of today's Star Wars announcement, a topical joke

In a deleted scene from Return of the Jedi, Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are fighting a duel to the death when suddenly Darth says to Luke: "Not only am I your Father, but I also know what you're getting for Christmas!"

Taken aback by the change of subject and suspecting a trap, Luke replie...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between Luke Skywalker and a black man?

Luke Skywalker eventually finds out who his father is.

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