J_ffr_y _pst_in

Anyone wanna play hang man?

Donald Trump was asked what the J in Donald J Trump stood for

He said 'Genius'

What's J. K. Rowling's favourite side of a triangle?

The Harrypotenuse

There’s a fine line between H and J...

It’s called “I”

Harry Potter Joke

Hagrid: "You're a unit of power, Harry."

Harry: "I'm a watt?"

So I read J. K Rowlings announcments.

I finally understand how dumbledore got The title of headmaster.

Why did O.J. Simpson want to flee to Alabama?

Everybody there shares the same DNA.

(Mandatory ba dum tss).

J.K. Rowling recently tweeted out that Hogwarts actually has a full gym for wizards to exercise and lift weights

The entrance is called the Dumbbell Door

Why did O.j Simpson fail as a baseball catcher

Because none of the teams gloves could fit

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A beautiful woman goes to a party.

While scanning the guests, she spots an attractive man standing alone.

She approaches him, smiles and says, "Hello. My name is Carmen."

"That’s a beautiful name," he replies. "Is it a family name?"

"No," she replies. "As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the t...

The cleaning lady at work asked if I wanted to smoke a J with her

I declined because I'm not interested in high maintenance women

Vicar: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T man and wife V W X Y Z

Groom: Why did you say that?

Vicar: Because I now pronounce u 'man and wife'

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The college teacher noticed that his exchange student, André, suddenly had started attracting a lot of female attention

So, one day he asks André about his secret. André replies: "Well, before sex I simply whip out my willy and smack it against the bedside table, like a hammer. It numbs it up and makes me last longer".

Later that day, the college teacher gets home to his wife and finds her in the shower - a we...

What's The Difference Between A Paint Shaker and Michael J. Fox?

A paint shaker works even if you let it keep its pills.

What do Michael J. Fox and the new guy at the warehouse have in common?

Both have trouble with the fork lift

What is O.J. Simpson's favorite drink?

Margarita, but he swears he never wanted tequila.

A man goes into a job interview

A man goes into a job interview, and presents himself well.

The employer is shocked at how professional he is, "Wow, you have an incredible resume, and present yourself fantastically, but you seem to be missing 5 years on this part of your resume. What happened there?"

The man replied ...

What is O.J. Simpson's internet address?

Slash slash backslash slash slash escape

Why does Michael J. Fox make really good milkshakes?

Because he’s rich and can afford the best ingredients

I asked my chemist father for a PB and J sandwich

But all I got was lead poisoning

"Anybody here named Jeff?"

Jeff: "Yes"

Geoff: "Yeos"

A quote of the President: Donald J. Trump

“I have broken more Elton John records. He seems to have a lot of records. And I, by the way, I don’t have a musical instrument. I don’t have a guitar or an organ. No organ. Elton has an organ. And lots of other people helping. No, we’ve broken a lot of records. We’ve broken virtually every record. ...

J: How do you think the unthinkable?

A: With an ithberg.

A B C D E F G, H I J K

LMNT of surprise!

Why doesn’t Micheal J. Fox own an ice cream shop?

He can only sell shakes.

If your dad is a chemist, never ask him to make you a Pb&j sandwich.

Pretty sure I have lead poisoning now.

A rabbi is on his deathbed...

...and a friend asks him if he has any last requests. The Rabbi asks his friend to find him a Catholic priest, so that he might convert.

Confused, his friend asks, "Rabbi, why? You have been a great teacher and leader of your followers, and you have led a good and honorable Jewish life. Why w...

Michael J. Fox

Terrific at making martinis. Terrible at stealing tambourines.

So j made a joke up

A master chef dies goes to heaven. Immediatly he finds himself in the kitchen doing what he loves. He begins cooking all the foood just like he did when he was alive. Finally he gets a strange order, a steak well done sprinkled with holy water. So he asks whats up with this order.

For Christs...

Me and Michael J Fox have a hand shake...

he must really like it because he keeps practicing it.

J.R. Smith can't wait for the NBA Finals to end tonight...

He thinks Cleveland is up 3-1.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What is the difference between Donald J. Trump and the Hindenberg?

One is an exploding Nazi gas bag, whose fiery crash and destruction played out on camera; the flaming doom marked the end, not just of itself, but for all that followed in it's line. Its blaze of failure permanently seared into the collective consciousness of humanity. A disaster that would be talke...

T.J. Miller and I have so much in common!

We're both not going to be in Deadpool 3

T.J. Miller has brought his comedy to a whole new level

At least when it comes to bombing

What's the difference between Tang and OJ?

Tang won't kill you!

Buried Knife Found at O.J.'s Estate

Proof that black knives matter?

What kind of character does J-Roc wish was in Dragonball Z?

Gnome Saiyan

I told my GF that I'm jealous of her V-J. She shows me NO pity, though.

She just rubs it in my face

I ap-p-p-p-lied for a j-job as a r-r-r-radio an-n-nouncer.

Sh-sh-shame on them, rej-jecting me because I'm b-b-b-black.

What do you call Michael J. Fox spinning around in a chair?

A fidget spinner

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Michael J Fox is the next hollywood star accused of sexual assault.

His victim said "his hands were everywhere"

What did the D.J. say to the Vegetable Farmer?

Lettuce turnip the beet.

"You're not gonna get a quote out of me." - Donald J. Trump

"Wrong." - Donald J. Trump

Michael J. Fox asked James Bond to come over for dinner one night.

Being a polite host, he offered Bond a drink when he arrived. "What'll ya have?" he asked.

"I'll have a Martini," Bond replied.

"How do you want it?" Michael J. Fox asked.

"Shaken, not stirred."

"Oh, thank God."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Defective Parrot (Long...)

Got this from another chain letter, actually made me chuckle...

>
The Defective Parrot.

A guy is browsing in a pet shop, and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch.

It doesn't have any feet or legs.

The guy says aloud, 'Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Why did the Nazi refuse to drink the fresh squeezed o.j.?

Because he prefers his juice concentrated.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Adam and his cousin Billie went out to the mall together.

While they were in the mall, they both ran into a cute girl named Jean. Both of them talked a bit to her, and both ended up with her number.

Billie and Jean became good friends, and he even had a crush on her. However, his cousin Adam had her as a fuck buddy which Billie was unaware of.
...

I heard O J Simpson likes to play golf. I think I can beat him.

He's out of practice and I heard he has a terrible slice.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the New York woman on the J train who woke up to find a bum urinating on her today?

Although upset, she was glad she didn't take the #2 train

Things Michael J. Fox would be good at

Grating Parmesan cheese.

I just heard news that the inventor of the Heimlich Manuever, Henry J. Heimlich, just passed away at 96

I'm still choked up about it.

The chemical name for water is H, I, J, K, L, M, N O.

H to O

I used to be a big fan of Michael J Fox...

...but his latest performances have been a little shaky.

Good thing that Michael J. Fox doesn't also suffer from Hayfever.

He's married to Tracy Pollan.

What does 'J' stand for in Donald J Trump?

'Genius'

(This joke was stolen from CharlieDarwin2)

I saw Michael J. Fox in a gardening centre the other day...

He had his back to the fuchsia.

Why did J. S. Bach have so many kids?

Because his organ didn't have any stops!

I carpool with Michael. J. Fox. Whenever he drives, I feel like royalty.

By royalty, I mean Princess Diana.

Apparently O.J. Simpson is getting remarried

He decided to take another stab at it

Do you think Michael J Fox....?

Do you think Michael J Fox ever gets an answer out of an 8-Ball?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

No one is more excited for today than Michael J. Fox...

He's been shaking with anticipation for the last 25 years.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle?

Nobody can.

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