What does a necrophile get at a funeral?

Mourning wood

Remember when Smeagol choked his own cousin to death to get at the One Ring?

Yeah, it was pretty metal.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you get at the end of a joint of dick weed?

Cock roach.

I definitely think Trump will get at least 270.

But with parole and good behavior, it could be as little as 200.

what did the necrophiliac get at the funeral?

moUrning wood





W H E E E E E Z E ! ! !

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm so get at sex...

that after every session, my wife has to go in the bathroom and turn on her electric massager. I think its because of her bad back?

What do orphans get at Christmas?

Lonely.

What grades did Fidel Castro get at school?

Full Marx

Regardless of which meal i get at McDonalds...

they all taste like a #2.

What do you call an injury you get at yoga class?

Yoghurt.

What do mathematicians get at the DMV?

A deriver’s license.

What's the worst kind of illness to get at an airport?

Terminal.

What does a woman with a missing finger get at the nail salon?

10% off.

What do people typically get at Whole Foods?

Ripped off.

What do bears get at raves?

Mauly.

What did the priest get at Toys R Us?

An erection.

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