Did you hear about the geometry teacher who left his parrot's cage open?


I don't understand why we study circles in geometry.

They're pointless.

What do you call a person who likes geometry and farming?

A pro-tractor!

Why was Yoda bad at geometry?

Because to him there are no triangles, only do-or-do-not-angles

I just finished up my spherical geometry class

Dunno why I bothered, there's literally no point.

I’m really glad I learned geometry instead of taxes.

Now that trapezoid season is coming, I’ll be prepared.

How is communism like geometry?

It's really all about Engels and most people only ever think of marks.

Why was the geometry teacher late for work?

Because she took the rhombus.

Teacher: "Little Johnny, give me a sentence using the word, 'geometry.'"

Little Johnny: "A little acorn grew and grew until it finally awoke one day and said, 'Gee, I'm a tree.'

Why were the geometry students so bad at sports?

Because they were really out of shape.

Worst Geometry Joke I Know

When does a Pentagon have only 4 sides?

When it is intercepted by a plane.

I need help with my geometry homework

it said to draw 2 planes intersecting 2 buildings.

Who's in charge in the land of geometry?

The rulers.

Girl, forget chemistry, you and I have solid *geometry*

Because our points are maximally separated, and it’s perfectly platonic.

One day a teacher asked her students to use geometry in a sentence

The teacher was baffled that nobody could come up with just one sentence, and finally asked one quiet student in the back to say one... The student looked at her and said:

Once there was a little acorn and it was planted in the ground and grew and grew until one day he awoke and said "gee I'...

I've got a fetish for geometry.

Sorry, I'm getting off on a tangent right now.

Geometry is the work of satan.

It makes people sin.

I used to be terrible at geometry

But I turned that around 360 degrees

Geometry class brought out the worst in me...

I used to go off on tangents.

I like to do algebra, I'll do geometry,

but graphing is where I draw the line.

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

Why do churches hate geometry?

Editted and deleted by Power Delete Suite. Get that shit over here:

What do you call a girl that can table dance infinitely due to unusual geometry infinitely due to unusual the geometry

A Mobius stripper

This joke may contain offensive words. 🤔

What's a porn star's favorite geometry term?

Cir "cum" frence.

What do you call a fisherman who is good at geometry?

A master angler.

Little Johnny was sitting in Geometry class

The teacher asks the class: "If a whale is swimming in the ocean at 314 miles per hour and the ocean impales it with a harpoon, what is the mass of the whale?"

Little Johnny raises his hand and says "That's impossible! What do you mean the ocean impaled it?"

"Well, it doesn't r...

Geometry professor goes into a tattoo shop and asks to get π on his back.

After a few hours he asks the tattoo artist, "Why is it taking so long to do the symbol for pi?" "Oh!" said the artist, surprised. "You wanted the *symbol*."

An artist found a way to draw a two-sided figure, but the International Geometry Summit immediately began to furiously contest the new shape...

I say, let bi-gons be bi-gons

Rick is sitting in his bar in Casablanca, enjoying the sublime beauty of geometry...

He raises his glass and says, "Here's looking at Euclid."

Why doesn't Hitler like geometry?

Because he's anti-symmetric.

The best geometry joke I know...

Once upon a time, there were three kingdoms, all bordering on the same lake. For centuries, these kingdoms had fought over an island in the middle of that lake. One day, they decided to have it out, once and for all.

The first kingdom was quite rich, and sent an army of 25 knights, each w...

Did you hear about the geometry teacher who tried to take a selfie?

It was a protracted process but eventually he found the right angle.

How did the geometry teach kill himself?

He used a hypote-"noose"

Why are fishermen so good at geometry?

Cause they're good anglers.

I'd like to teach under-privelaged kids lattice geometry

Nothing would give me more pleasure than getting at-risk youth hooked on crystal math.

**EDIT** I'm terribly sorry for misspelling under-privileged

I'm trying get a job as a geometry teacher...

Because I want to make at least 6 figures.

Why did the priest dislike geometry?

It's sin-ful.

[self made joke]

Geology rocks, but geography is where it's at..

And geometry's a cute one too.

I was fine with my earlier math classes,

but geometry is where I draw the line.

What did the oak tree say to the math professor?


God and his 2 omnipotent friends are deciding how they should make their new world,

When trying to decide what to add to their world God's first friend says "We need to create a large strong animal that can pull around our people's machinery and that they can ride long distances to save their legs"

"Don't worry" said God "I have just the thing from the last world I made, the...

What do you do when you have 10 minutes to complete your math test?

Geometry dash

An Arkansas farm boy goes off to college...

When he comes home for vacation, Maw and Paw are glad to see him. That night at the dinner table, Paw says, “So, tell me, son, what are you studyin’ in that there college?”

The son says, “All kindsa stuff, Paw. F’r’example, I’m takin’ a course in Geometry.”

Paw says, “What kinda stuff ...

A British fellow just doesn't understand why people like cricket.

He tries, he tries so hard. He knows it's his national sport. He also doesn't care much for football and rugby, and always feels left out at the pub. Then one day, he comes in early for a pint, and there's this strange game on the screen. "What's that game up there, Albert?" Albert looks baffled, "w...

There was a horse who was a genius at arithmetic...

...which it learned with no difficulty. Algebra was a breeze, and it could even prove theorems in Euclidean geometry. However, when someone tried to teach it analytic geometry, it would rear back on its hind legs, kick ferociously, neigh loudly, and make violent head motions in resistance.