Scientists annoy me, they’re always going on about Boyle’s Law and Archimedes’ Law.
One came up to me and said: “If you had an apple which experiences no net force, then its velocity is constant: the apple is either at rest, or it moves in a straight line with constant speed – Newton’s Law”
So I said “Here’s one for you: If you have an apple, a carrot, a cabbage, mayonnaise ...
Archimedes, Newton and Pascal are playing hide and seek.
It's Arcimedes' turn to seek and so he starts counting down.
Pascal quickly runs off to some bushes nearby.
Newton starts walking, stops thinks for a while and them draws a large rectangle around himself in the dirt.
The time is up and Archimedes turns around: "Found you, Newton...
Archimedes wasn't just known for inventing his many inventions. He's also considered to have invented the first insult when talking to his brother who was a cheese maker after discovering a early form of lindburger cheese....
He simply stated, You reeka!
Newton, Pascal and Archimedes are playing hide and seek...
Archimedes starts to count, Pascal hides in a bush and Newton draws a square on the ground and steps into it. Archimedes finds Newton first, of course, but Newton replies, "Nope. One Newton on one square meter is equal to one Pascal."
I explained to my friend that he shouldn't be afraid of drowning in the sea because of Archimedes principle.
But he was too dense.
Archimedes law of bathing
When your body immersed in water, the phone rings
A Russian joke
An American, a Serbian, a Russian and a Greek are stuck in a falling airplane. There are only three parachutes there.
The American says “I am from the most important country. Let me jump, I am important.” The Serbian gives him a parachute and the American jumps.
Then the Greek says “I ...
Moms being Moms
*Issac Newton's mother--* "But did you wash the apple before eating it?"
*Archimedes's mother--* "Didn't you have any shame running naked in the street from? And, WHO is this girl Eureka???”
*Thomas Edison's mother--* Of course I am proud that you invented the electric bulb. Now tu...
In response to the invitation for a rather unusual reunion of all time greats.......
\* Newton said he'd drop in. \* Socrates said he'd think about it. \* Ohm resisted the idea. \* Boyle said he was under too much pressure. \* Darwin said he'd wait to see what evolved. \* Pierre and Marie Curie radiated enthusiasm. \* Volta was electrified at the prospe...
One scientist to another...
"Have you ever seen an Archimedes screw?"
"No, but I imagine they do it pretty much the same as other Greeks."
This joke may contain profanity. 🤔
The Immortal Bard
*This is not my joke, it is actually a short story written by Isaac Asimov, but it is written like a joke. One that I found quite humorous. Hope it belongs here.*
"Oh, yes," said Dr. Phineas Welch, "I can bring back the spirits of the illustrious dead."
He was a little drunk, or maybe ...