UPJOKE
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What do you get when you simmer a clown in its own juices?

Laughing Stock

I simmered ten comedians in water for 6 hours.

and made a laughing stock.

Husband eats dog food

A married lady goes to her doctor for her annual checkup and everything is good. In her conversation at the end of all the tests and examination with the doctor she expressed a concern about her husband.

"As you know I raise champion golden retrievers and one evening I was making thier foo...

How do you cook german composers?

Just let Hans simmer for about 2 hours.

I have some great stock tips..

Always keep the simmer low and slow. Save up the odds and ends from veggies. If you're using chicken, skim the fat/floaty bits off to get a clear liquid etc.


If you keep doing this, you end up a bouillonaire.

Adam knew he studied hard for his test, but couldn’t figure out where he went wrong.

He had spent almost 2 weeks preparing for this test. If he didn’t get 100%, he would fail chemistry and have to take summer school.

Knowing this, he panicked and furiously scanned the test to find out where he went wrong. Finally he saw the final question marked with an X. “Draw an atom”.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I heard a man talking in a Scottish pub...

He was saying "Ya noo, I fathered seven children from these loins, raised 'em meself, but do they call me Seamus the Father? No!"

He took a long swig and continued. "That bridge on the edge of town? Built it meself, with me own two hands! But do they call me Seamus the Bridger? No!"
<...

An old man is traveling to a far off land, but is arrested in a city named Runnia along the way.

The townspeople of Runnia are convinced that he was the murderer of Barth F. Bradley, the local butcher. Though there is not much evidence of the claim, a witness claims he saw the old man leave Bradley's shop on the night of the murder. The townspeople, who were always suspicious of strangers, cons...

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