Rascal Jokes

He is now known as Kareem of Wheat

If you give them the opportunity, they’ll eat Buckwheat and Alfalfa.

This is one of the first "long" jokes I learned as a kid.




So Spanky, Alfalfa, and Buckwheat are in the 1st grade together. The teacher tells the class " Today students we will pick a word and use it in a sentence. You may pick any word but don't pick a word that someone has alread... read more

The Little Rascals are sitting in class one day when the teacher decides it's time to do some spelling. She says "okay students it's time to spell our word of the day. Today's word is DICTATE. Who thinks they can spell it?"
Spanky, being the leader that he is, raises his hand first "I can te... read more

Oat Hay!

read aloud for best effect ...
Teacher stands in front of the class full of the Lil' Rascals.
She asks Darla to spell dictate.
Darla, "dictate: d-i-k-t-a-t. Dictate."
Sorry Darla that is incorrect.
Teacher asks Buckwheat.
Buckwheat says, "dictate: d-i-c-t-a-t-e. Dictate."
"very... read more

"Oh you little rascal, you took a sip of my beer, didn't you?"

Buckwheat raises his hand.
“Ok Buckwheat spell the word.”
Buckwheat spells, “ d-i-c-t-a-t-e”.
Miss Crabtree: “Very good, now use it in a sentence.”
Buckwheat says, “ How my dictate Darla?”

Bartender asks if he can help the dog with anything.

Dog says, "I'm lookin for the low down rascal who shot my paw."

Secretary: He asked me if I was free tonight.
Friend: And?
Secretary: I said yes......and that rascal gave me 50 pages to type!

Bank: Hey government. I need money to pay my workers or we're gonna go out of business.

Government: Hey bank. Sure. I remember you from Harvard, how are you doing?

Bank: Doing great, actually! I remember you too. Frat bros for life. Thanks for the cash.

Government: Frat bros for... read more

An Italian man is kidnapped by the mafia, who want him to tell them where his company’s money is hidden. They put him in a chair at gunpoint and demand the location, but he won’t tell them a single word.

After a while, the mafia members decide that he isn’t going to be of any use to them,... read more

He stealthily begins to stalk up on him, intent on making a meal of him. However, the dachshund catches a glimpse of him out of the corner of his eye. Knowing that there's no way he can win a footrace against a leopard, he decides to employ other tactics; he sits down by a nearby pile of bones. Once... read more

Her husband calls says: "Be careful love, It's just been on the radio, that someone is driving opposite to the traffic on the highway.."

She replies: "Someone...? These rascals are in hundreds!"

"Moses, is that you?"

"Jesus, you rascal, how have you been?"

"Oh, good, no complaints. Say, you know that thing you did with the Red Sea?"

"You mean parting it?"

"Yeah, that. I missed watching you do that the first time, and well, we're here by this big lake, so I was wo... read more

Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren’t prepared for the answer! In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand. He approached her and asked; "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you,... read more

A reporter was interviewing a pirate.
He asked, "Sir, how did you lose your leg?"
"Well, matey, that was back in the bloody war o' '72, when we cut the heads off o' every last one of the deadliest rascals on the Seven Seas, The Mutineers."
"How did you lose your hand?"
"T... read more

Is it wrong to sleep with other women after marriage?God replied"NO". Man:So why do people say its bad?
God:Its not bad..But the problem is that you Rascals don't SLEEP!

An 80 year old man went for his annual check up and the doctor said: "Friend, for your age your in the best shape I've seen."

The old feller replied, "Yep. It comes from clean living. Why I know I live a good, clean, spiritual life."

The doctor asked him how he knew that.

"Wh... read more

A woman ended up caring for two female parrots belonging to her father, who had to enter a nursing home and couldn’t take them with him.

But he was kind of a rascal and taught them to say some rude phrases whenever anyone new walked into the room.

Their favourite was, “Hi, we’re hooke... read more

A little bar in a small town was having a concert night and most of the town showed up. They were curious to see who in this town of everyone-knows-everyone would go up and perform.

The barman introduced up on stage a couple of highschool kids, the Little Rascals, that were going through the... read more